What support is available for a bereaved teenager facing homelessness?

[BakingLady2323]

A friend of my son is about to find himself homeless, I think, and I am worried about what will happen.

His mum died about 1.5 years ago -he has no relationship with his dad and I think the dad is just not interested.

After his mum died he lived with his aunt and grandmother for just less then a year bit moved out, against their wishes and advice as they were too strict and controlling. He returned to the house he had lived in previously, with his late mums boyfriend. It wasn't a very long relationship, maybe they had lived together for 18months before? The house was a state and he turned upto school in dirty clothes and didn't eat properly. He seemed uncared-for. There was a lot of alcohol.

The partner has just died. The house belongs to HIS daughter. The child doesn't want to live with his dad (who probably would not want him anyway), and really won't want to live with his aunt and grandmother.

Does anyone know what will likely happen? This is England btw. Social services are visiting him tomorrow.

How old is he?

What a sad situation.

https://england.shelter.org.uk/housing_advice/homelessness/emergency_options_for_homeless_16_to_25_year_olds

https://centrepoint.org.uk

https://foyer.net

https://www.crisis.org.uk

I know you said he was 15, not 16, but hopefully you can get some help and advice from these organisations.

How close are the kids? And what are your finances like?

I think that often at this mid-teenage stage, ss will try and home the child with someone who they know well - family, friends etc.

Realistically it’s 2 or 3 years of full support plus some soft-touch support once at uni/appprenticeship stage. Would that be something which you could consider?

Where are PPs seeing the age?

He is a vulnerable child and SSD have a responsibility to help him.

Hopefully Social Services will be helpful. I just wanted to put a suggestion out for him to call Childline anytime if he ever wants to just talk about his ongoing situation.

Social services should accommodate him if he has no family or friends to stay with. If he's still of school age this should be foster care or once he reaches school leaving age it could be a foyer type placement. They will allocate him a social worker who will support him into adulthood. There is a fair bit of advantage for him coming into local authority care so if you can, advise him to take whatever they offer him and play the long game. If he's still looked after when he turns 18 he will get a fair bit of leaving care support.

Oh sorry, I wrote in the title that he is 17 and a bit (but then the ai suggesteda different title).

He's 17, at 6th form. We have actually moved last summer so live about 2 hours from him now. The aunt/granny and father and school are in the same area.

Social services were involved when he went to live with the aunt/gran. They received no financial help. His father only paid me child benefit when he was made. Their mum left no money.

It's not workable for him to live here, but maybe he could come for holidays?

Christ, my typing! That father did not pay ME any child benefit, obviously.

That's interesting, thank you. Could you say more about the advantages of care? Also, would he be supported to finish 6th form, which would be about 6 months after he turns 18 ?

... and do you mean school leaving age of 16 or 18?

Foster care / supported living is quite hard for kids: outcomes aren’t great and rates of abuse and neglect are pretty high.

Would he consider term time with aunt/gran and holidays with you do you think if his concern is that they are strict? Possibly with you offering a mid-term weekend?

If he’s 17 that’s older than I thought so you’d only need to commit for a year plus some soft-touch support for a couple of years afterwards.

You could try contact the NHS Children in Care nursing team where he lives and they may be able to help or at least signpost you about who to contact. Agree with others that he needs to get into the Local Authority system to get the right support. He is eligible for support until 18 and would then have access to some support as a care leaver. College have some responsibility from a safe guarding perspective too if he is at risk of homelessness

My ds thinks he should go back to his aunt/gran, but he's saying absolutely not. I don't think they were especially strict, just that he lived with no rules at his mum's and then her partner. It was basically a doss house. Lots of alcohol (they both died from it) and men coming and going. I didn't let ds go there.

My house probably has the same rules! I also worry about the possible influence of the boy on my son tbh so not sure I really want to commit to that.

Where is he staying at the moment, OP?

Is he at the ex partner's house?

Does he have a roof over his head until school starts back?

Does his school know what has happened?

The leaving care act sets out legal duties to careleavers - this is a legal status that applies to people who are still legally 'looked after' on their 18th birthday. They get a personal adviser until 21 (25 in some circumstances), support to get into accommodation, training, sometimes help with university or other further education, a small grant to set up home, housing priority with the council etc.
https://england.shelter.org.uk/professional_resources/legal/housing_options/young_people_and_care_leavers_housing_rights/social_services_duties_to_children_leaving_care

Outcomes aren't great on the whole but the negative impact of being a looked after child doesn't really apply to a teenager who comes into care at age 15/16. If he is minded to put his head down and make the best of it then foster care could open a lot of doors for support that otherwise wouldn't be available.

Social work will contact LAC nurses, there is no point OP contacting them.

The school should make a referral to social care. They need to be made aware of the situation and will look at all his options. Poor kid.

It would be worth looking at any benefits he would qualify for. If he's unable to manage these himself someone else can be his appointee.

Universal credit looks possible https://www.gov.uk/universal-credit/eligibility Citizens Advice may be able to advise. Outcomes with social care aren't great, if there are any other viable safe options would go for those first.

As someone who has brought up bereaved children … firstly my heart breaks for this kid. The poor sod. Secondly he does need to go back to the aunt and the gran. You should step in and persuade home that wherever he lives there will be rules. Explain that he needs family around him. I would have had to step in months ago tbh and I’d probably have him living with me. I’d don’t expect you to do that but that’s just because of our experience.