Is this relationship fading out, or am I being strung along?

[Muddle4Puddle]

I have been in a relationship for a year now and after a lot of arguments, it seems like (to me atleast) that we are now in the slow fade/fizzle out stage.

In the past month alone we have spent barely any time together- maybe 10 days dotted over the course of a month and all included sex. Nor have we communicated outside of argumentative messages (at times I have had to block him), no good morning, nothing emotive, etc. I have been told that I don't initiate or reach out to him at the moment, but when I do I either get ignored until I provide a reason for reaching out or blunt messages until I give up. However when I leave it, I get bombarded with messages about how he is the only one trying to save anything and threats of him moving on with others if I dont try and reconcile. In this time I also get accused of wanting or trying to date other people (i'm not) but he is obviously expecting me to wait around for him and I really dont think he is doing that for me, I have no proof other than him getting a new number to apparently message me off when he was blocked and a dud Instagram account for the same reason (?).

I admit I am now starting to see this low level energy from him and just feel like I am being strung along to keep me stuck, like I am a maybe until the grand reveal that he has managed to move on. I am really confused about all this. I care for him deeply and want us to work but I dont want to be investing in something and being left on a string for the day where I just end up ghosted or I see he has met someone else.

Help please.

Just because you care about him doesn’t mean this relationship is the right one for you. I would end it immediately. It sounds miserable.

Who could be bothered with all this nonsense? Move on.

Fuck. That. Time to move on op.

This sounds absolutely miserable and exhausting. Move on

Pretty sure everyone is going to say the same thing - time to move on.

If you’re arguing and only meet up for sex, then it tells you the relationship is over.

A year is still the honeymoon phase when people are on their best behaviour. It's only going one way from this. Time to move on.

Just to clarify the meeting up for sex isnt something that is explicitly stated or planned atleast for me. It is usually where he says he wishes to talk and attempt to reconcile. However we do that, end up having sex then the next day it is back to ghosting. I feel now I am being led up the garden path and used, I dont want that to keep happening.

I also feel like I am ready to move on, I somewhat have made peace with it, maintain no contact then he turns up at my door, the above happens and I am sucked back in thinking we are trying to make things work, then feel really stupid afterwards because I have been a fool. However when I say no and that I am trying to move on, he accuses me of cheating and gives ultimatums.

I guess I just want something solid to say it is one way or the other. Its all just very confusing and my body doesnt know whether to shut off or stay somewhat open. I know im being ridiculous from an outside perspective but the dynamic is trapping me with the unknowns. I think he is just keeping me around until he actually moves on and doesnt want me to do that first. As I am more than willing to cut everything off dead now.

“he accuses me of cheating and gives ultimatums”….

Let him … he doesn’t even like you.
Get rid and move on- you owe it to yourself.

Dump him, you deserve better than these miserable stale crumbs. He's treating you so horribly and not like someone he cares about. You can do better than this, honestly.

I care for him deeply and want us to work

Why? What is it about him that makes you feel like that? You don't have to tell us but I'd like you to answer that for yourself.

He's not just stringing you along, he's actually treating you very cruelly. I suspect he doesn't really want to be in the relationship (I use that word advisedly) in any meaningful way but is thoroughly enjoying the ego boost of being able to treat you appallingly, feeding you crumbs to make sure you don't leave, and you keep coming back for more. Oh yes, and he likes the sex. Bet he's selfish in bed.

This relationship is dead. Sounds like he is just using you for sex now. Time to call a halt to this for once and for all.

Far too much drama in the first year. Agree with others he’s just picking you up for sex.
This is the time to be having fun and enjoying each others company not being subjected to accusations and blocking.
he sounds very immature.
Dump and don’t look back!

You care about a previous version of him not the current one. It is akin to liking an old version of windows and you are too scared to restart and update in case it doesnt do for you what the previous version did however the update is always better in the long run.

Shut him down. Move on and update when you are ready x