Frenemies and Not True Friends

[FaceIt]

Got an event coming up soon that I can’t get out of, and I’m dreading it already, as an old ‘friend’ of 22 years will definitely be there. She’s highly competitive about our DC’s and brow beats me about their achievements, and everything really, including a recent cancer diagnosis. Who’s is worst. It’s unbelievable. I’ve never known anyone like it (apart from her father who is a narcissist).
She’s also very arrogant, which goes with the territory, and has known a lot of people over the years, but it’s clear to see they have all distanced themselves.
I like an easy life and I’m quite laid back, and I don’t want to be fair game and taken on by her, as it’s exhausting and I can so easily end up looking like the one with a problem by defending myself.
So over to you lovely MN’s, have you got any good lines I can have ready to come up with pleeeeaaaase 🙏 😁?

I don't engage with people like that. They ask about my kids, I just reply "All good thanks, anyway how is [whatever is in her life at the moment]". If she asks about illness "Oh you know, we're getting there, oh! there is friend X I must catch up. I'll come back to you later". And move on to someone else as soon as you can and avoid her. Never give her a snippet otherwise she'll be all over it. If she stops talking to you then job done, I say!

Hi, Julie, how are you?

Me, oh I'm doing fine, thanks. You?

My cancer? Oh, keeping an eye on it, you know. Yours? Oh good/oh dear (?as appropriate).

My son, oh he's doing fine, just fine. Your boy?

Holidays? Oh, haven't decided yet. You?

Just vague, non-commital, polite. Give her nothing to work with; and depending on the format of the event, excuse yourself from her physically or start a convo with the person the other side of you, as relevant.

The best thing about being an adult is you don't have to deal with this high school shit anymore. Avoid, don't engage, spend your time with people you want to spend your time with.

Thank you all. I love all of these.
Really helps. I’m such a weed 😂

Never ask a question back. “Nice to see you” “all is well” “dc are growing up fast”. Keep it short and polite. Do not give her reason to question your life. I learnt the hard way!