What can I do about my shrill voice

[Thevegetarianchef]

I've always been a chatterbox and worked in busy bustling environments where it was mentioned but nothing ever came of it.
A couple of years ago I went somewhere quieter and it was mentioned bearing In mind I've worked over 40 years it was hurtful.
I researched and was diagnosed as hyper active impulsive ADHD.
I'm hyperverbalism which I've worked on at my new place for 2 years.
It was mentioned again and I've really tried....This place is busy and bustling.
No it's been noted my voice is shrill.
Any tips on how to tone it down.
Apart from get new colleagues until they mention it.

This is you ! Just be you lovely and if someone doesn’t like it they can always go elsewhere
Don’t try and change who you are 💐

You could try being more mindful if you're really loud, but that's about it. Good luck.

I'm not sure if I can change my pitch.
I think it's a neurodivergent thing.
I'm trying not to shrink too much whilst being aware of others.

Isn’t neurodiversity a protected characteristic. Whilst it doesn’t give you carte blanche to opt out of office norms, you should tell them, and they should be more understanding. I don’t like the thought of you sitting in a corner being afraid to speak. What would happen if they had someone with Tourette’s? Tell them their tics were too much and yo tone it down?

Find out who Thatcher went to - she did it!

Slightly different, but when I moved to a more senior role I made an effort to speak slowly and at a quieter pitch.

I did it because it made everyone shut up to listen!

Who’s mentioning it? Like a manager in an official capacity? Or a co worker? You can try to speak more quietly but expecting you to adjust your tone is unreasonable.

The word shrill is tinged with misogyny in my opinion. Who is calling you shrill?. they're out of order.

You could see an acting voice coach. I think it might be fun to learn to talk clearly like Maggie Smith or other esteemed actors. You can also do voice courses for confidence in speaking. I looked into it after I had a stroke. I didnt do it but I guess it's never too late to try something new.

Co worker supervisor.
She doesn't like me knows I have differences and nit picks them.
I overheard by accident as she herself talks A LOT.

Shrill as in high pitched, or shrill as in loud?

If you want to change your pitch, a voice coach could help you explore your voice and breathe better to express different parts of your personality, so that you have more choice about your tone.

I would change nothing. I would keep a note of what she's said about you and if it becomes bullying as in repeated or used to turn others against you, then complain.

Shrill is horrible word used to shut women up. Men are not described as shrill.

Shrill is a horrible word. In my busy office there are men and women with all sorts of tones and volumes. I guess we notice people who are outside the norm a bit but no one minds or has an issue. Maybe speak to one or two people who you trust to help you identify times or situations where you could work on being more mindful.

I have the opposite problem and have a low monotone voice which I try to soften otherwise I sound permanently pissed off (I'm not)
I'm very sensitive to noises and there's a woman at my workplace with a very shrill voice who makes me physically wince. Her voice actually hurts my ears.
It is hard to try and change your voice and takes a lot of concentration/masking but it's good to recognise when you're causing annoyance to other people and try to tone it down.

To be honest, if your voice is piercing, or loud, and you’re constantly talking then they have a point. It’s incredibly frustrating not to be able to concentrate in a shared office.

I do agree that ‘shrill’ is a very gendered word though. But a bloke’s voice would probably be described as ‘booming’ and both are valid complaints.

The environment is nothing like an office.
I wouldn't fit in in one.

Fair enough, my mistake. Would still be hard to concentrate though, if the job needs that from people.

Tbh maybe she is neurodivergent too.Misophonia is a dreadful thing.I can't do chewing or throat noises.

Where is the inbox now ?

My mum’s friend had elocution lessons. Or voice coaching.
worked really well.
my mum joined her for moral support

“low & slow” was the mantra!

Good advice thank you.

Definitely low and slow. Also, if you speak a little quieter, people have to strain to listen, so it actually engages them more. If they don’t lean in then you know they don’t want to know.

I find shrill and high pitched women's voices very difficult to deal with, I want to put my hands over my ears and back into a corner. It's my issue though as I'm really sensitive to noise, I wouldn't dream of complaining to anyone.

I also hate men's loud booming voices before anyone accuses me of being misogynistic 😅

Good tips thank you.