How to support dd with food noise, binge eating and self harm

[Toadstoollover]

Please could I ask if anyone would be willing to share their experiences about food noise, binge eating/bulimia and self harm.

My 14yo dd is really struggling at the moment as she is full of self hatred. She hates her body but she cannot stop eating or thinking about food. She says that she thinks about food even after she’s eaten and when she’s not hungry. She then binge eats and hates herself and self harms and has recently been trying to make herself sick.

We are in the process of getting her support. GP and school are all involved. But I am trying to get insight of what this must feel like for her. And to navigate how best to support her.

Any thoughts and advice would be welcome.

Is she on social media? If so, a detox on that front.

What types of foods is she eating? Does she understand basic nutrition? Like protein Vs carbs etc.

She needs to distract herself when she thinks about food or her body.
Doing something active like walking in nature will not only keep her mind off food, but let her become aware of how strong and wonderful her body is.

I’m so sorry you are going through this. Unfortunately it’s a disease. I went through all this and my parents tired everything they possibly could. Various weight loss surgeries, medical interventions, therapy upon therapy. Nothing worked until Mounjaro came on the market and I feel like finally I am a normal person. For over 40 years thoughts of food consumed me and nothing helped. Now I have no noise and I feel like life is worth living.
I know she is only 14 but I recently asked my mum if Mounjaro was available back then would you give it to me and she said… in a heartbeat.
I wish you the best of luck, it’s not easy.

I agree with PP about detox of phone/social media. I don’t have experience of binge eating but do of teenage self-harm. There’s a form of therapy often used to treat it called DBT and it’s very very effective. If you can afford private therapy, I’d look into that. If you can’t afford private therapy, it’s possible to get a grasp of it through free resources online. The different elements include emotional regulation and distress tolerance - both of these can held situations become less likely where the person would self harm.

Thank you everyone so far. We haven’t done a social media detox but we have had conversations about it and she has definitely cut down on the doom scrolling.

She understands nutrition as I’ve always tried very hard to give the dc a balanced diet. Although she often binges on chocolate, it really can be anything such as one banana not being enough or eating a whole punnet of grapes. It’s like there’s no off switch.

@PonyPals thank you for your story. With all the recent stuff about WLI I’ve become more educated on food noise and it being a disease. I doubt they are available at her age and I’d be reluctant anyway just due to the unknown long term effects especially on a developing body. I just can’t imagine what it’s like to be consumed by thinking about food.

@CannaeBelieveIt I haven’t come across DBT but will look into it. Thank you.