Would you leave Year 5 and Year 7 home alone after school?

[Jinglejinglejingle7]

Advice please. After a struggle following redundancy, myself & Dh are both getting new jobs. Ive had a job offer and dh looks like he's about to get an offer. Big change in circumstances as I'm going full time in office and dh will be hybrid, possibly 3 days in office. I may have some flexibility to finish early and wfh but I cant push that yet.
Problem is we have 2 dc, eldest year 7 youngest year 5. I think they are old enough to be left at home for an hour/ hour and a half. Eldest makes her own way home already, youngest gets picked up/ dropped off but its 15 minutes walk max and he's 10 now so could walk or eldest could collect. Dh worried that they're too young. I dont think we have a massive choice. Would u let 10 year old walk home, then stay with his sister for an hour or hour & half on they're own? They're sensible, get on well, we leave them now to run to shops/ walk dog etc.

Sorry yes I merged 2 of the cases together. It also states that she didn’t need to accept the caution and that it makes a bit of a laughing stock of teenage parents in that case.

anyhoo - it’s not closely related to the OP situation as she’s not leaving a toddler with her older child,

The school can’t decide that. You’re the parent and those decisions rest with you.

Not at our school. That is their policy and if you don’t like it, you have to collect your child as normal. Given you sign to say an adult is present, if one isn’t then you are lying to school, not ideal…

It might be their policy but it doesn’t supersede the rights of a parent.

But there's no indication the OP's child's school does this, is there?

Most schools, IME, have policies for children in the juniors to be allowed to walk home if it's suitable. Obviously some schools can't for good reasons - if there's no sensible walking route, perhaps.

The OP's children are already used to going out for walks on their own, she says - they go to the shops unaccompanied. So it doesn't seem likely they're somewhere where they can't easily manage the 15 minute walk home from school.

No, and I'm usually pretty relaxed. Might be where we live though.
My year 8 happy to leave and starting to leave her with her year 5 sister, but not after school

Although my year 5 isn't 10 yet as summer born. I think that does change things.

...and raises the hilarious possibility of a parent requesting their child walk home on a Friday and the school refusing and having to hang on to the child until the Monday morning.

It would also be very cheap childcare over the 6 week summer holiday. 😁

If its only for a hour or two and they are not crazy, they should be fine. From Year 7 my Mum could leave me at home for a whole day, she would leave task lists for me to do.

How can they police this? We live close to our primary so my daughter would often go home, drop off her bag and then go back out to the park so she’ll be in the park next to the school within 10 minutes of school ending. If a teacher sees this would hour school then stop her walking alone as they think she hasn’t gone straight home? how would they know?

If no parent/guardian has collected within 1 hr and is uncontactable, SS would be called to collect the child. Not exactly a hilarious possibility. It's a phone call many who work in schools have had to make when a parent is too high/drunk/off with the latest lover to collect their own child.

SS wouldn’t be coming to collect the child. At most, they’d contact the parent to confirm that they had parental permission to leave alone.

It reminds me of the ‘you aren’t allowed to leave the hospital ward without a car seat’ ‘law’ that is sometimes quoted. Most people are happy to go along with the school or hospitals preferences but it is a preference and the final decision lies with the parent(s).

I don’t know about outside the village children but staff patrol the park and the walkways every so often (as there have been problems) and if a child was at the park and the teacher suspected they hadn’t gone home first they would either ring or go to the house (in a pair). Have heard this at other schools too.

The parent would be contactable. They'd pick up the phone and say, "Yeah, I'm here at home waiting for them to arrive home."

Yes I'd love to know how this is monitored, are the teachers walking them home? Or do they request a FaceTime confirmation that their parent is there? and who is coming out to rescue them if they're not?

So many questions.

When mine were the same age my eldest came home and my youngest went to a childminder. Now yr 7 and 9 they both are home for an hour or two before we get back most days and are fine.

How do your kids feel about it? My year 7 needed some practice, I’d make sure my mum was home (next street) and her or my step-dad would check he’d got home ok.

My year 7 is happy to stay in the house on his own for a couple of hours if his sister and I are out at her sports .

Yes. The key word is contactable. But it's not a "hilarious possibility" was the point I was making. It's traumatic. It's distressing enough for the staff having to phone about abandoned children. It's utterly traumatic for the child. And it's not just a possibility. It happens. Scarily often, unfortunately.

But you seem to be talking about children who are actually abandoned, whether intentionally or otherwise. Social work aren’t going to be remotely interested in a child walking home with their parents permission. The school would need to evidence why that particular child in these particular circumstances was at risk if they walked home alone, rather than a general children are at risk under X age.

I have the same aged children. Year 7 gets home by bus and is home alone until we get home at 5ish. Year 5 is at after school club (begrudgingly). I might reconsider this Becky year when years 8&6

Where on earth do you live? Sounds intense round your parts.

Here, kids walk home, drop their bags and go back out to play. Some let themselves in and watch TV until their parents come home

School staff check the park every so often and if a child arrives there suspiciously quickly they will phone home/go home to check if within the local area. They have had safeguarding issues so are very very strict on this. So yes they do check and a friends child was mistakenly thought to be missing (had come home and gone upstairs, parent at home but in a meeting), grandparent turned up at school to collect because the child hadn’t been seen on the way home or at home), school staff arrived at the house very shortly afterwards.

Mine are now in Y8 and Y6. They have been doing this for a year pretty much - usually less than an hour, but sometimes up to 1hr45min. The youngest is ridiculously mature and capable. The eldest is
pretty good. They can call and message me. I think you have to decide what they can manage and also
weigh it up against personal circumstance. Mine have been happy and it’s worked well for us.

Totally normal for y5. I've said so up thread. My DC were doing similar at that age.

My issue was with a pp thinking it would be "hilarious" to call the schools bluff to get free childcare for a weekend/holiday. Having had to make those phone calls and support children through that, it is no laughing matter. It's traumatic. There are some things you just don't joke about and child abuse is one of those things.

That’s not what she was saying @purpleheartsandroses . It was a take the piss response, akin to having a ten year old on a postpartum ward because parents didn’t supply a car seat to leave the hospital with.

Point is, walking to and from school is a parenting decision not one a school should try to impose.