Being an adult means...

[NotDarkGothicMama]

Going to the loo when you have the opportunity, even if you don't need it.

Doing what I want when I want. Well it did before I had a child 😂

Having to figure it out.

Not spending all your pocket money on the contents of the confectionery aisle, despite having promised your younger self that you would do so.

Being over the age of 18 ..

I promised myself I would go to bed as late as I wanted as a grown up. Grown up me realises your up at 430 for work and you go to bed not much later than the three year old child.

Responsibility, whether you can be bothered to live up to that or not. (Not including people who are unable to.)

Endlessly being responsible and making the right choices.

And usually getting it wrong for me 😬😂

“When i grow up im never going to bed early” adult me: pleeease let me get an early night 🙏
“im gonna eat whatever i want”
adult me: this this and this makes me bloat 😠 lol.
”i can do whatever i want”
adult me: can’t find 5 minutes to read my book without a child interrupting me for something they want 🤦🏻‍♀️ 😂.

Realising that being in bed by 8pm and asleep by 9pm is the best thing ever.
Getting excited that it’s sunny outside so you can cut the grass.
Crying because you need to do a shop food and decide what your eating for dinner AGAIN worse chore of them all. 😂

I can remember a friend asking what I’d do if I won a million pounds on the pools (showing my age there!) I confidently replied “I’d spend it all on sweets”. She was surprised and I was shocked that she was surprised. 8 year old me couldn’t think of a single other thing I’d ever want in life, apart from sweets. Which is probably why I’m a chubby adult!

for me, one adulthood arrived in early twenties and was defined by my getting to decide about my own life and not relying on my parents for money. But there was so much to discover and pretty high deference towards what others thought.

The more treasured, but in some ways sadder adulthood has come for me in my late forties. The good part of the feeling is having true sovereignty and self confidence over who I am, my purpose, my person, with something we could call wisdom and perspective, and feeling reasonably free from caring what anybody else thinks of me. The sad part is feeling I don’t have parents, mentors, or people ‘above me’ to go to for advice or care. My father is dead. My mother is lovely, but I am more likely to know or find and implement solutions than she is, and we will likely move towards her needing active care quite soon. Even my professional mentors/ those much older than me, generally are a few years retired and getting out of date, while I am the one leading…. So there is this slightly lonely, tired feeling that the buck stops with me. There’s some pride and confidence in it, but also lonely. And that feels like being fully grown up.

An endless loop of deciding meals for multiple people every day for eternity.

It's weird isn't it how when you're pregnant or have a tiny baby you don't think of how much meal planning and cooking you're going to end up doing. It's definitely one of the worst parts of being an adult with children 😂

Never having a duvet day (haven’t had one since early 20s, over 18 to be fair but I’m 46 now!)

Spending a ridiculous amount of time on food - planning, shopping, cooking, washing up and having to do it all again.

Also laundry.

Oh yes, so much cooking. You just ate, go away!

Getting excited over boring presents, like a new colander.

Making decisions for yourself. Paying bills and food shopping. Again.

Learning to pick your battles

Doing things you don't want to do because they have to be done by someone, and that someone happens to be you.