The birthday blues

[Littlebitlostnow]

Does anyone else get the birthday blues? It's my birthday on Sunday (double whammy with mother's Day too) and I'm dreading it. People keep asking me what I'm doing. I have no plans. I have young kids, maybe I'll get a cup of tea in bed but that's about it. It's weird, I hate the day, but I also want to feel special, but I also want to ignore the day. It's so conflicting

Decide if you want to ignore or make it special and then plan accordingly.

Yes me! I feel the same about birthdays. My life has turned out to be pretty shit and, due to the actions of other family members, my extended family are now more distant than ever so I find birthdays a bit depressing.

There is also the pressure to feel like you need to be doing something totally amazing.

Praise be.

I can't remember ever finding my birthday anything other than cringingly hideous and wishing I could cancel it. Which by my 20s I pretty much had done. So I relate hugely in one way but not to your conflict at all. I don't want to feel special, I just want to ignore it.

I love that basically nobody knows now when it is. I've been at work on my birthday, at other celebrations, helping out with school discos and loving how ordinary it is and that nobody knows.

You don't have too, do anything special.
You don't have to be with family either, there's always friends which is the family you choose for yourself.👌

Oh god I feel this viscerally. I have alot of birthday related trauma which makes me constantly swing from "let's do something nice" to "we are doing nothing at all" because I'm get so in my head about worrying over the feeling of disappointment.
I think the best thing to do is plan one nice kind thing to do for yourself and then decide whether your "doing the birthday" or not. But make sure to do a kind thing for you.

Do you have a SO or adult family to do something with? Friends?

Failing that do something fun with your kids? Ask them what to do for mummy's birthday. You might have a lot of fun. And go to a nice cafe for cake or another treat.

I’m the same - maybe it’s a Pisces ♓️ thing as mine is next week and a big birthday -
lots of kind family & friends wanting to do things to mark it - so blessed I know - but I feel so pressured and burnt out with the stress of it all 😩- feels like the tide is coming in and I can’t stop it 🤦🏻‍♀️