How do I address this envelope?

[Inbedat930]

Need some wisdom!
I’m sending a card to someone who is divorced and now lives with a new partner.
What surname should I put on the envelope- their married name (Mrs XXX) or their maiden name?

Do they have children with XH name? Most, not all women retain married surname in this situation.

I wouldn’t overthink it.

What name do they use on SM? Use that. (I mean assuming it's their real name and not "crazy panda" or something).

If using their "married" name, I might just write "first name/last name" rather than adding "Mrs"

I would just put first name if I wasn’t sure. It’s a minefield with some people. If you think she will mind it being wrong, avoid the issue!

I'd put Ms and their married surname if you aren't aware they have changed it.

first name and surname

Wwhere I am not 100% sure what they prefer, I use Ms instead of Mrs if I address them.

For an envelope I only use first name, last name, never a title.

Unless they’ve told you that they’ve changed their last name then use their “married name”.
a last name isn’t something you borrow and then automatically rescind upon divorce.

if you’re unsure if they’re using Mrs then just put first name last name.

Don't put Ms. That's entirely separate and could be insulting. Just name and married surname unless you know they switched back.

I’d just use the last name you knew them as.

My sil didn’t take brothers name so i just write first name and first name. Can you do first name only, particularly if it’s not a bank statement or aome such which I doubt it is!

Why would Ms be insulting?

First name and the last name that you know her as, unless you've been told, or seen a social media update 'my name is now X'. Titles are meaningless and an annoyance that women are afflicted by and men are free from, they spend their entire lives as Mr first name last name.

Don't try to guess what you don't know, there's endless possibilities. I know a divorced woman who's gone back to Miss Maiden Name, another one who, while married to DH number 2, is still known as Mrs DH number one. Another one who is Ms Maiden Name.

Do you even know that she was Mrs Married Name, many married women are Ms Maiden Name even when they are married and unless she's explicitly told you she's called Mrs Married Name, you might be working off other people's assumptions, she may have been Ms Maiden Name all along.

DO NOT USE MRS

Don't you know what surname they are currently using?
Can you check before sending the card?
Don't put Mrs.
Put first name last name

First name only if you’re not sure
The post office only need the
door number / hse name and postcode anyway

Traditionally it would be Mrs Clare Marriedsurname (to distinguish her from Mrs Herbert Marriedsurname, pre-divorce). That's old-fashioned now though.

I would just put Clare Marriedsurname unless she's switched back.

I'd ask them

I wouldn’t put ‘Mrs’ anyway - I never do, or Mr or Miss/Ms either - just their name, Jane Green or whatever.

Well you don’t need to be debating over Mrs/Ms/Miss as titles are not compulsory, so just write her name. Equally if you don’t know what surname she uses just put her first name. It’s the address that dictates where the letter goes anyway, you could write Mickey Mouse and it would still get there.

Just write her name “Henrietta Brown“.

Traditionally, when she was married, she’d been Mrs Edward Brown. Once divorced she’s Mrs. Henrietta Brown. The partner is irrelevant, unless and until she changes her last name, whether to his or a completely new one.

… but I agree with earlier posters. Why can’t you just address it to her first name and her last name? Whatever the last name is, depends on whether or not she’s changed it after divorce.