Not sure what I want

[50nifty]

I'm 50 in the summer. I want to be with my 2 adult children to celebrate after work on the actual day.

A particular west end musical has been a favourite of our family for over 10 years. I'd like to splurge on top seats + champagne for me and the kids.

Their father introduced the family to the musical and our love of it grew from there. He and I got divorced in 2021. The last time I saw the musical with the kids, it was a big family event as we were still married.

I've been with my boyfriend for 18 months. We've been to see the musical together. He loves it too. Things are great with him - it looks like he's my new Mr Forever.

I can't decide if I want my boyfriend to come to the musical with my kids and I on my birthday. They are fine with him coming - they all get on great. I'm not sure where my head is at with it though, given just how many memories we all have of the musical with their dad.

I know I want to see my boyfriend on my birthday and I suspect he'll be a little sad too if he didn't see me. He'll understand if I don't want him at the theatre, but it feels dismissive not to invite him.

Help me process my thoughts on this please.

I can totally understand the sort of turmoil this is bringing you. Putting myself in your shoes, I would see the musical with just my kids, and if it is possible have your partner round to your house together with your kids later.

I can see the other hand of it though, having your partner and kids together to see the musical. It will be poignant, it might be a little sad, but life changes and that feeling will be there too.

I've just given you two opposite and equally valid scenarios so I'm not sure I've been much help !

I'm glad you've met your Mr Forever

I think it’ll mark your new chapter and family set up to go all together with your boyfriend.