Single mum, 6m old to childminder

[WhatAmIsupposeToDoNow]

I became a single mum when baby was 3 months old. My husband/ dad doesn't want to be involved at least for now. I am heading back to work early April when baby turns 6 months. Will start by taking 1/2 days annual leave and slowly build up full time. Here's what I have on my list to do so far'

1. Get used to formula. Takes bottle with breast milk but refuses formula. I'm gradually increasing amount of formula
2. contact napping. This one is going to be hard.
3. Weaning. Want to get all I might need, have a plan and start introducing soon

Anything else I am forgetting???

Answered in thread title!

Childminder at least for now

Sorry, I should have mentioned I am mixing breast milk with formula. She is taking it ok.

Have you secured one that you’re happy with?

@Eufyon - yes, I met her before and really liked her. We will meet up again just to make sure everything is aligned etc.

What age group are her other charges? You want one very set up for very young babies.

Maybe have a chat her with about how she approaches weaning?

As long as you’re happy with who you leave your baby with, the rest will fall in to place. Trust me

Don’t worry about trying to change the contact naps if you don’t want to. For one, baby will learn to sleep differently with the childminder whatever you do, it doesn’t need to be the same at home as with the childminder. Plus baby sleep inexplicably changes all the time anyway, so if you enjoy contact napping crack on, but you mind find baby starts doing something different soon without you trying.

If you mean weaning on to food, rather than off the breast, you don’t need anything really. Just give baby the same as you cut appropriately (no honey, whole nuts etc) have a look at baby led weaning. They don't need special food. Keep it simple for yourself

Try not to worry to much dc will more likely accept a bottle of formula from childminder than you. My ex left during a much wanted ivf pregnancy (and never had anything more to do with dc). I had to go back to work at 6 months too.
Dc was fine napping at nursery from day one. I had a nursery near work so I could pop in and bf at lunch if needed but dc took milk from a beaker (wouldn't use a bottle) from staff.
Weaning will just happen the less stressed you are the easier it is. It doesn't happen over night and you can make a plan with the childminder on how to slowly introduce solids, maybe starting each new food on your days off if that makes you feel more comfortable.
What helped me was having all bags packed the night before, clothes layed out, packed lunches made, breakfast etc all ready. I had a strict bedtime routine and then once dc was in bed I'd eat, shower and go to bed myself.
This is obviously not what you planned but you will both be ok. If I could tell myself one thing back then it would be relax your doing your best for dc with what resources you have.

Gosh what a lot to handle.

As PPs have said don't worry too much. Babies do fine with learning to feed or sleep differently with different people & in different settings. I would encourage a transition toy that can be handed over every day for familiarity. Apart from that, keeping home consistent and letting your CM establish the childcare routine might be better than trying to change a lot at home now.

Weaning - you just need a plan, you don't need to do it all. The CM will follow your lead. It's normal to start with just one meal a day, usually at lunchtime, and you don't have to do anything more complicated or rush it just because she will be in childcare.

My eldest's at uni. Half my friends went back to work at 6 months because that was what they could afford. One friend planned to go back at 9 months but her baby adapted so well to her early settling sessions that she ended up going back to work earlier than planned. It should be an easier transition for your daughter than if she were older and separation anxiety had kicked it - harder on you though. Good luck, you've got this, and your CM is there to help.

I did this too. It worked eventually!
I didn’t really try any weaning before 6 months, more or less same time as they started at childminders. We both built it up together! At least yours is taking bottles - my second refused point blank up till a few days before he started!

Our childminder asked what time he napped and I looked at her blankly as it was all frankly a bit ad hoc! but she helped us sort that out. Working on no contact napping is probably a good idea.

Other than that - no idea, sounds like you have it sorted! Don’t worry too much about weaning - it’s still going to be mostly milk and if yours sees other children / babies eating it’ll encourage them.

Adding as well - I found the childminder a huge help, she was a brilliant ally. It’s not like I’d weaned a baby before, and she was excellent for years. It was great having another adult who adored our little baby and would talk about him with us, what he liked to eat, things he liked to play with, discussing new steps and stages for him. Best of luck with your setup! Agree with the “get it all ready and laid out for the morning” part - that really helps. And get easy food in that you can cook quickly and easily on the evenings when you get back too. Take care xxx

This! DS now 13 started with his CM at 9 months, left at 9 years She was an amazing person to have around.

@Justneedtogettotheend1 - any chance you are my twin sister 😂I am IVF pregnancy as well. My husband tried to begin with but when baby was 3 months completely lost it. Blaming IFV for everything as well.. fair enough it wasn't easy. But that's another matter completely.

Thank you for your encouragement. It's certainly hasn't been the maternity leave I have planned for myself. I'm just hoping it's going to be better by the end of the year.