I didn't realise quite how feeble I was

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I'm fit. I run and I do lots of yoga, I'm surely stronger than most my age (55).

I had a box to move onto a shelf in a cupboard. I couldn't lift it enough to get my hands under it to eventry and lift it up iyswim.

I asked DS (22yo, with a manual job) to help, imagining it would be a two person job, and he lifted it like it was nothing.

I didn't like having my frailty demonstrated. I know people will tell me heavy weights are the way to go, but even so, this was a shock.

'Frailty' is a bit extreme! I run and do pilates but also do weight training four times a week, it's really important. I'm 53 and can chuck my 10kg cabin bag in the overhead locker on the plane with no effort.

Men are stronger than women, their muscles are configured differently and even the angles of their joints are different. It's not that you're old.

Men do tend to be stronger
but neither yoga nor running really build a strong upper body

Besides if DS is 22yo with a manual job he's going to be quite a lot stronger than your average man. My mid-30s DH with a sedentary job is fairly fit but would be a better comparator for "average man" than your DS!

I agree. It's very frustrating. I'm not strong enough to do a lot of things and not tall enough at 5ft 5" to reach high enough for others. I have to get my adult sons to help. I hate having to rely on other people but there's no way round it.

You might be “fit” but you’re not strong. Yes lift heavy weight, it helps with bone density as well get older.

Running and yoga isn’t going to build muscle and muscle decreases after menopause. You need to do some strength training or something that involves heavy lifting.

My MIL and my mum are the same age. Neither of them has ever done much exercise beyond going for a walk. But my mum does a lot of very heavy gardening, always has done, whereas my MIL never does anything like that. Both now in their early 80s and MIL can honestly barely lift a bag of shopping whereas my mum can still pick up massive bags of compost, big heavy boxes, suitcases etc with ease.

It depends on so many things, though - if you were trying to lift something high (not quite sure from the description), it will be much harder for you to lift to over waist height, than for him, because women's lifting strength is mostly in their legs whereas men can lift more with back and shoulders.

I'm 41, quite strong and fit; I work a manual job and I regularly have men surprised by what I can lift - and I still know perfectly well that a 22 year old man, even one who isn't as fit as me, will simply be able to lift heavier weights without even trying. It just is what it is.

In terms of fitness it is very good for women to do some weight lifting, because it helps with bone density as we age. But smaller weights over longer periods is better for you than trying to heave up one heavy weight every now and then.

Well im not as strong as I thought either and im mod 40s!! Had to lift a washing machine to the lip of a skip with a male friend today, nearly went soooo wrong as he lifted quicker than me throwing the machine off balance. Got there in the end.

Theres no way round it? You can increase your physical strength by weight training.

You can be strong doing yoga it very much depends how you practice and frequency. My mum is a yoga teacher and insanely strong! (In her 60s)

I am one of the strongest in my Pilates classes, usually the weakest at CrossFit. It’s all relative. However I’m getting stronger all the time, and research seems to be showing that we can get significantly stronger at any age so it’s never too late. There’s no comparison between a 22 yo man and a woman in her 50s though!

Look up Caroline Girvan and/or Growingannanas and/or Heather Robertson on YouTube if you want to try working out with dumbbells.

(I started weight training and at 65 I am super fit…)

Yes, I can do that too.

Yoga does build muscle. Maybe not as much as heavy weights do, but it definitely does. Lots of weight bearing exercise there, and I can definitely do things now that I couldn't when I started.

Sally gunnel on face book has been posting simple functional fitness videos for starting strength training in your 50ish+ exactly this situation. Really easy entry level strength training. I’m in my mid50s and my teen girls are stronger than me but just doing 3 months of weights I’m feeling stronger. I also run, yoga, cycle but struggled with 5kg weights.

Obviously I expected a fit 22yo man to be stronger than a fit middle aged woman. I was surprised just how much stronger.

There’s a massive difference between a 22yo man ans a 55yo woman. Anyway why were you lifting a bulky heavy box when you’ve got a beefcake son to do it for you? Enjoy the benefits of adult DC.

2 years ago I broke a rib lifting a heavy box! Delicate wee flower that I am.

A young, fit man is pretty much always going to be stronger than a middle aged woman, so I think “feeble” is being very unfair on yourself.
I’ll always ask DH to lift heavy stuff because he’s much stronger than me, what’s the point in me risking injury when it’s nothing to him?

It’s a young man thing I’m afraid. I would (modestly!) consider myself very fit but watching my (also fit!) son go through puberty and overtake me in all aspects of strength and speed over a period of a few short years was an eye opener. He still doesn’t have his mum’s endurance though.

It does a bit, but not in the same way that actually lifting weights will. You might build a bit of strength but if you want to be stronger than you are now, you’d need to do some weight training.

I'm older than you and super fit/active for my age by most standards. I do Yoga or reformer Pilates 5 or 6 times a week and walk a minimum of 5 miles a day. However my very unfit, couch potato husband can still lift things I can't budge. Generally speaking, men are just stronger than women. However my grip is stronger than his so I'm better at opening jars.

Running will improve your cardio, yoga will improve your flexibility. Neither build muscle. You need to regularly be lifting weights for that, and actively lifting to failure

Running and yoga aren’t for strength.