Childcare. Would you?

[Gonnagetgoingreturnsagain]

My DB has got some film work which involves him working abroad for 6 weeks maybe more. His wife works but sometimes long hours. They’ve got a toddler and 7 year old and need help with drop offs and pick ups. I currently don’t work apart from volunteering work, I’ve got time to do this. Would you do this if you were me? I’ve childminded young children in the past but a long time ago. Kids are good with me and I drive.

They’re not keen on childcare apart from the nursery and school. They’ve told me this.

I'd maybe offer to pick them up on Fridays but wouldn't expect to be paid. Just like I used to go to my nan's for tea after school once a week. Does it have to be all or nothing?

Their mum literally couldn’t do all the drop offs and pick ups by herself due to her commute. She could possibly wfh more. My brother’s current job means he picks up the childcare load mostly. I’m torn as outside childcare would be good but it’s only for a short time.

I would do it for a set period of time, and certainly wouldn't want to be paid. They haven't even asked you though

It kind of sounds like you just started this post to criticise your SIL to be honest...

This!!

I would always help my family in this situation

In your position i would definitely do it. But that’s me. (But no way would I ask to be paid)

I’m not criticising her! She has a long commute and needs to be in on time sometimes early. Morning rush is always busy.

They would insist I was paid.

Whether intentional or not it certainly comes across as you being judgemental.

You say your brother would love you to have the children, implying it's your sil who wants to use childcare?

You say you brother has to do the pick ups but she could work from home more implying she's not chasing the load.

It's a really odd thread to be honest. They've told you they prefer to use proper childcare, haven't asked for you help and seem to have arranged cover as needed but you somehow think you would be better placed to look after their children?

“Let them” do the thing they were always planing on doing, and never spoke about doing anything else?

SIL would probably prefer childcare as she knows it’s a lot of work. My brother only found out this weekend about this work (which he’s accepted) and my SIL has been doing lots of overtime (stopped this weekend) so they barely get a chance to talk. I do know SIL prefers them to be with friends family rather than outside childcare apart from school and nursery as that’s what she’s told me in the past.

Read my latest post. They have no idea what they’re doing. Would an au pair do this? Nanny? It’s not like they can ask neighbours or school friends parents to do this. Whereas I’ve got time and I know the kids well. If I didn’t have time or didn’t want to do this I’d say no. I can also do things like cook, run a bath for kids. If SIL was running late or working late.

Taking on too much when you don't work?

I wouldn't dream of not helping out if I didn't work and I wouldn't ask for money. It's what families do. It would be very different if it was for a long period but for a few weeks...

I don’t really understand this thread. Your brother who you seemingly like, needs some help and support for a few weeks. You have capacity to help. You think he would like your help, But you aren’t sure if you want to offer even a small amount of support for some undisclosed reason. Yet simultaneously you were already planning about asking for payment..even though apparently they’d offer anyway so you wouldn’t need to ask.
Then as the thread goes on you decide not to offer at all but are still posting about how they’d pay you and they’d love you to do it.

your language about them being backed into a corner, not knowing what they’re doing and ‘letting’ them get childcare is all a bit odd too.

You volunteer outside the family but assume they would want to pay you for this?

Anyway , I would do it, I have done it. No payment, but some lovely memories of my sisters kids.

The kids especially younger can be hard work. Nothing I haven’t dealt with with them though.

My SIL at least would insist on paying me. Or paying toward something I wanted.

My main thing. They’ll need childcare. My SIL isn’t keen on external childcare apart from what she has already. I know the kids and look after them for a day sometimes. I’m just thinking out loud as to what to do. SIL’s brother might come down from outside London to stay and help out, he’s done this before and can wfh but couldn’t commit to 6 weeks. My parents couldn’t do this.

I volunteer because I want to do this. It is quite a lot dropping off both kids and picking up. I’d have to work my day through that but could do things on my laptop. Though brother mentioned to me by text today that SIL may do nursery drop off. As on her way to station.

If they needed your help though then they would ask for it? You don't know they've not got something lined up, it would make sense to have sorted the childcare before your brother agreed to the job.

Your whole thread is based on the assumption that they need your help but nothing about the situation suggests they do?

Wait until you are asked, then decide once you know just what it is they would expect you to do.

Not quite sure what the issue is…if you want to do it 5 days per week, say ‘Hey DB, I’d be happy to do it’. If you’d rather have one or two days for yourself then offer the amount of days you’re happy to do. Not sure what else there is to consider apart from your personal preference of how to spend your time (which people on Mumsnet can’t help you with), you said you don’t work and don’t have children.