Any other mums with ADHD?

[Northstar26]

Hello

I was diagnosed with ADHD (primarily inattentive) whilst pregnant and I’m really struggling with the day to day with my 7mo. I’m on mat leave until August. DP is great and does as much as he can to take load off, he does dinners and often helps plan lunches with me, I just feel like a complete failure.

I know as a new mum lots struggle like this but every day the timings of feeding/napping/me showering & eating, and now weaning is completely overwhelming me and I feel burnt out and upset every day. I used to be bad enough finding it difficult to eat three times a day and keep myself in a routine but now it feels impossible and I’m constantly berating myself. It takes me forever to do anything.

Any other ADHD mums feel the same?

ADHD late diagnosis (kids older) and if it wasn’t for my Alexa booming out reminders I’d be a mess.
Congratulations by the way, having a baby is overwhelming for anybody!!

Also late diagnosis with a teen and single parent. I have about 12 alarms set on my phone at any given time for different things

Yes late diagnosed ADHD and ASD. I have 2 DCs and spend a lot of time overwhelmed. It takes everything I have to keep everything organised for my DCs and give them the childhood they deserve, as well as working and nursery and school runs, so my needs don’t get met.

yes recently diagnosed. Are you on medication? It really helps me in some aspects like I am less overwhelmed, less scrolling on the phone, I can plan something and follow through with it. So I think it can help in some ways. But to be honest still not a magic pill. I just had to lower my standards quite a bit, get help where possible i.e paid childcare. When my daughter wasn't going to nursery we got a cleaner for once a week and it significantly improved things. Maternity lave was very hard on me and I just don't think I can mentally take having more than one child due to adhd and constant overwhelm. Its not great but I am 5 years into motherhood now and things are much better + medication seems to help quite a lot

I’m so sorry typically me I posted and then forgot…….. Thanks @CookingFatCat @Overthebow @StarCourt
I do have lots of reminders on my phone but the more they are the more I seem to ignore them….

No medication yet, I’m on a waiting list but I’m still breastfeeding and unsure if I can take on them?

Thanks for your experience. Yes understand on lowering standards, I just feel bad for baby that I’m always overwhelmed and probably not doing my best. I’m also wondering if it’s more responsible to stick at one but I always wanted two

It’s actually wrecked my life. I really struggle with the ‘it’s a superpower’ narrative.

I have dyspraxia which means I have a bit of dyslexia, bit of autism, bit of adhd and a whole lot of clumsiness. I have 5 nd children and a husband with autism. Somehow we kind of muddle through, with support from school. I have a lot of lists and I have an adhd cleaning planner. I wish I had a super power but mostly I am just a confused disaster.

I’m sorry. I struggle to see the superhero bit too

Diagnosed at 37 12 years ago, when my children were 5 and older. I have 4 dc, 3 also have adhd and asd

I’m unmedicated due to a heart condition.

im completely at sea with it all, i am hyperactive as well as inattentive and my life is a bit of a mess, add peri meno to the mix and its game over.

the only thing that helps me is the ‘do it now before you forget’

doesn’t always work but if something pops into my head that needs doing i make myself do it there and then. Works about 50 % of the time 😂

I also forget to set reminders!

it’s also not a superpower to me either, it’s destroyed my life

Same here - late diagnosis - ADHD is often the butt of jokes , but the reality of overwhelm, overthinking, chronic relentless anxiety and self - judgment , the shame of disorganisation, procrastination and chaos is an exhausting burden to carry .
Please be kind to yourself, dial down your high expectations and aim for just passable .You’re being incredibly hard on yourself .
Most of all enjoy precious time with your baby and future babies hopefully 🙏🏼 as you sound such a loving new mummy xxx❤️

I found the Tracey Hogg Baby Whisperer book the best investment ever.
As it got me into a loose routine & I swear during the times I used it, I was the most organised & put together mum ever (got lots of compliments & totally surprised people)

Its totally different to the G Ford routine/books as it's more into happy mum, happy baby.

As ADHD inattentive I hate routine & timetables yet it's something I need to make my life easier & to function in an NT world. It works! It's amazing!
Ive actually adapted Tracey's EASY (eat activity sleep you) into (eat, activity, stuff, you) so it fits into both SAHM & parent working outside the home.
Though I still have my moments when I think I'm fine & I don't need anything to assist me as I can manage
I do still have my off days where everything goes tits up & I hate having a routine but I know that having some kind of routine makes my life so much easier & I don't get overwhelmed & can cope & thrive in an NT world.

Yes. I wish I was more organised and not such a disaster with life admin. I find trying to sort schedules, kids and dogs and staying on top of work is about as much as I can do. I’m a lone parent, work ft and take the DC to activities 5 night a week so I got a cleaner once a week, which is a total game changer. My DC are older now so much more self sufficient, luckily, but I wish I didn’t always feel so wrung out by the weekend.

I'm with you on the life admin. Other people seem to find it so easy but I find it so hard. Ds2's PIP form was due so had to concentrate on that which made housework get out of control again. So I will focus on that this week and then be in a mess of world book day stuff, odd socks and trying to find ds2 a driving instructor.

I see my SIL just doing all this stuff by pressing a few buttons on her phone and I'm thinking how is this possible.