First Valentines Day after break up - anyone else?

[ScullyD]

It’s been 9 months since my break up from the person I thought I’d spend my life with and I know not everyone does but we always celebrated Valentine’s Day. I’m feeling a bit sad and weepy although I’ve had less of those days over time.

it’s pathetic but I have errands to run tomorrow and worry the sight of a happy couple or rosy bouquet will cause me to get upset or something.

anyone else?

Awe sorry OP. That’s rubbish. Anything you can treat yourself to?

@HK04 I’m actually just recovering from flu so not up to much anyway. Will be a quiet one. Last night I dreamt about my ex for the first time in ages - that was tough.

single or coupled, hope everyone has a nice day.

You won’t always feel like this so do something to keep yourself occupied and tomorrow it’ll all be over.
Be thankful you escaped a bad relationship, some people are still in them and have to pretend they like the utter numpty they feel pressured into buying crap for.

Celebrate yourself and feeling better. Pick yourself some flowers, who cares who paid for them, you will still enjoy them. Your ex doesn’t deserve you feeling sad for 9 months. Be more positive and happy. Lots of self care. Nobody is worth wasting your time like this. I bet your ex isn’t. Time to move forward. That was then. Done and dusted. Exciting times are ahead of you . How much more time are you willing to give to this situation? You are worth more than this. Your time is precious.

The first year of anniversaries and special occasions is the worst. Next year you might not feel sad about not being with him at all, certainly not as intensely as this year.

Try to distract yourself with something that makes you happy. 💐

@trirose i understand your sentiment but it’s not that simple. you can’t simply switch off deep loving feelings and I truly loved the man.

ive done the right things. I’ve been through therapy. I’ve started new hobbies and spent time with loved ones. But today is hard. We always celebrated together.

im not exactly wanting to still be dreaming of him either. I’m really trying.

I really truly hope I don’t feel like this in a year. It is hard to go from sharing your life with someone to nothing.

clearly it’s going to take me more than 9 months.

Did therapy help?

@trirose it did. It helped to rebuild my confidence and stop romanticising him/see the problems clearly. It helped me move forward.

but it doesn’t fix everything especially when alone on valentines day. There were some aspects I found annoying like ‘is it really him you miss or just having a partner?’ - funnily enough my best friend who is in therapy repeated this.

Yes I specifically miss him because I chose him for specific qualities. But he turned out to be a very disappointing partner at the end.