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Midlife crisis or career drained?

2 replies

jamiefraserforever · 11/02/2026 12:23

I'm 40 and a full time working single parent. My DS takes up pretty much all of my time outside of work. I don't have time to socialise much or go out, as my son is always with me. I suppose this makes work a massive part of my life, as there isn't much else going on.

I have worked in caring professions for two decades. I have spent my adult life in jobs that are stressful and hold a lot of responsibility. It is a fast paced area of work and the responsibility is obviously never ending. It can be quite restrictive and challenging. By nature, I am a natural caregiver; I have always been a person who puts other's needs before mine. I think this is why I initially went into this area of work.

As time is going on, I am becoming increasingly unhappy and frustrated within my role. I dream constantly about doing something more holistic or creative, pulling back some energy and saving it for myself. Something that brings me joy also, instead of coming home everyday feeling stressed and drained. There's a constant tapping in the back of my mind that something needs to change, that I can't carry on in a role that depletes me so much.

Times are tough for many of us at the moment, the news is full of gloom. My desire to find joy in life again is getting louder and louder. There is also a fear of stepping outside of my comfort zone and doing something I enjoy. I also think there may be a feeling of guilt. The life I'm living right now is really getting me down. My son brings joy everyday however, as work is such a big part of my life, am I wrong for thinking it's time for change? Has anyone else made a midlife career change? Does anyone relate to this feeling of utter depletion?

OP posts:
LesserSootyOwl · 11/02/2026 12:28

YANBU to want a change. How realistic is this? Unfortunately, creative careers that bring you joy aren't always easy to find or well paid. But maybe you could move sideways to find something related but less stressful?

How old is your son? How long before you can leave him alone at home?

jamiefraserforever · 11/02/2026 12:36

@LesserSootyOwl Yes I'm aware of that, I do understand that most jobs of this kind would be self employed also, so take time to build. All I know is that I can't carry on like this for the next nearly 30 years. I get no satisfaction from my role, and I do worry that this will make me desensitised in the long run.
My son is only 8, so way off leaving him at home yet. His dad works all over the world, so not available to him often. It's not really my son that bogs me down, it's how I spend 9/10 hours a day being restricted and overwhelmed by constantly having to meet other peoples needs. It makes me feel really selfish for saying this, but I am so exhausted by it in every single way.

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