As someone who has struggled with poor mental health for most of their life and recently had a diagnosis of adhd and over thinks and over thinks over thinks, I don't think that I handle stress that well.
I can handle the actual stressful situation at the time of and often I will step up when others sit back but I find that it always ends up affecting me physically in the end (bad IBS, nausea, shaking, headaches, muscle pain, exhaustion etc).
For the last 8 years I have been supporting many family members and I no longer feel that I am the strong person I thought I was and wonder how much more I can take before I crumble.
I supported my DS (now 20) when he was going through 5 years of school anxiety/refusal (every single day) but I am his mum so that is my job, supported my DH when he lost his mum during covid (died from cancer due to covid shutdowns delaying her treatment), supported my bf when she lost her mum 2 years ago and I am currently supporting my dd17 whilst she struggles with issues at college.
The most stressful of all my 'supporting' roles has been over the last 6-8 years. I have very much supported my dad whilst my dear mum gets worse every year on her Alzheimer's journey. I supported them both when she had a breast cancer diagnosis 2 years ago and went to every hospital appointment with her (which she found very confusing). I have supported them throughout each week as I live just round the corner from them. I was there for them when mum fell and fractured her neck last summer and had a hospital stay where I needed to be her voice and advocate for her and I sat with mum and dad for 26 hours in A&E last weekend when she had an infection of some kind (they still don't quite know what it was). This week I continue to be her voice now she has been placed on a ward where they have not look after her well at all (whole other story and thread). I continue to support my dad today when I will be visiting a care home this afternoon where mum will go into asap because we are discharging her from that awful hospital before they kill her off.
I do all this whilst I struggle with my own unresolved chronic health issues and my dreadful perimenopause, which frankly has been a crap experience so far (maybe exacerbated by the stress of everything in my life?).
I continue to do all this for people who need me but secretly I just want to go home, crawl into bed, pull the covers over my head and not come out again.
How does everyone else help to hold other people up all the time without breaking? How do you get through really rough times in your life and continue to enjoy life? Some people seem so strong when life gets tough, I may look as though I am but inside I am as weak as a kitten.