Our phones are in charge of us

[jimoine]

I usually have my phone on do not disturb. I only switch this off when I’m actively waiting for an important call that I don’t want to miss. Otherwise I just decide when to check it myself so that it doesn’t interrupt what I’m doing.

However, I’ve noticed that even when in DND mode, my phone decides for me that I should still be disturbed even though I’ve told it to leave me alone.

Example one: someone calls me when on DND. The first time, the call doesn’t go through to me, but just notifies the caller not available. They call again, but the second time, the call goes through.

Example two: I’m going for a run with my phone so I can listen to music. Even when on DND, the music momentarily goes a bit quieter in order to tell me I have a notification.

Fuck off DND. You are still disturbing me. Just be honest and tell me you are D.

Smartphones masquerade as being indispensable but we all know they are the devil.

Both of those are features that you can change in the Do not Disturb settings. On Android at least, I don't know about iOS.

My phone must be lying to me because the settings are currently no people or apps allowed when in DND mode. This is iOS.

If this is the worst thing you have to worry about, you're bloody lucky.

I left the flat during a phone call

I panicked no less than 4 times that I’d left my phone at home 🤦‍♀️

Here’s a wild idea. You could turn it off. Then it would only be able to look reproachfully at you from the table.

I literally have nothing else to worry about, it’s amazing!

There’s also an option if someone calls twice in X mins it’ll go through even in dnd

have you checked that option

In iOS you can turn off the repeated calls getting through feature by going into settings>focus>DND

Then click on the bit that says no people

There’s a toggle switch there for repeated calls.

You need to change the settings. It’s you not the phone. You have control

Why do people make this kind of comment? It makes no sense whatsoever. Why would you assume this is the worst thing the OP has to worry about? Even people with very serious problems in their lives do actually think about other issues too.

Speak for yourself. Your phone does not have to control you. Never mind what it does or doesn't do on this or that setting - put it away if you don't want to be disturbed. It might be a revelation to you, but phones do switch off as well!

Imagine a world in which people only ever grumbled about the very worst thing in their life...

OP, I tend to turn off my data and wifi connections, rather than using DND- it's so quick and easy to do that-

True, but there is nothing wrong with making an observation that various things about the way phones' systems (and apps and social media) are no doubt designed to be addictive and to dominate our attention. Looking for convenient ways to reduce those effects through your phone settings rather than just putting your phone away doesn't seem like an unreasonable thing to want to do tbh.

It's not unreasonable but it's overcomplicated - OP is elevating a small, handheld object way beyond its status - if you don't want to receive calls, it can be switched off or put away in seconds, there is no need to trawl through endlessly nested menus trying to find the right 'setting'.

This

I disagree. The huge and ubiquitous issue of smartphone usage and addiction and their effects on human brains and behaviour, combined with the fact that it's hard to actually function in modern society without using your phone for lots of things, can't really be solved by saying 'just switch it off'. I mean... it can on an individual, practical basis, but it's pretty clear from the last sentence of the OP that we are talking about more than simple practicalities about how to switch off notifications here.

I agree you need to look in the settings for the allow repeated calls through. This is usually so someone can break through if there is an emergency. You can turn it off.

I have certain contacts that can break through a normal DND setting ie close family. My phone automatically goes into DND mode at a certain time at night and wakes up at a certain time in the morning. I set these.

Only if you let them be in charge.

Get a £20 MP3 player for running.
Turn your phone off and put it in a drawer when you can't be arsed with it.
Do that a couple of days a week and have a complete break from it.

I didn’t know I had to manually change those settings in DND, so thank you to those who have pointed it out - I’ve now changed them.

Despite my efforts to reduce screen time, I am absolutely addicted to my phone and I admit it. It’s extremely difficult!

MP3 for running is a great idea.

The only thing on my phone I find utterly addictive is MN!

Imagine if you put your do not disturb sign outside your hotel room door and the chambermaid kept knocking anyway or just barging in.