Anyone’s kids done an exchange?

[Ozgirl76]

My 15 year old son has come home and said there are some spots on the school exchange - we’re in Aus and there are places in Germany, S Korea, Canada and S Africa. He is a bit keen (I’ve vetoed SA already) but I am less keen!

I just feel like - if he told me he was going to spend even one night with a total stranger in our own suburb and the only thing they had in common was children of the same age, I would be like “umm no of course not” and yet here we just….jettison all our stranger danger fears and let them go off and stay in a different country for three weeks?

Im totally prepared to accept I’m wrong about it, so have any families here done exchange?

My DC's school does exchanges and we have done several over the years - France, Belgium, Spain. Not as far for us, given you're in Aus! We have hosted the foreign child too of course. They've all gone well, the exchange kids were really nice.

How does your school choose the families? As far as I can see in ours, anyone can do it. Like, I can do it and I’m nice but I could easily not be nice. Is the whole thing just based on trust?

Basically - yes!

Exchanges were extremely common when I was a teenager in the 90s and I went to France and Spain . They are now not common due to child protection issues. I think you just have to go on trust. I’ve hosted foreign students between 14 and 20 years. I had to be dbs checked (check I have no criminal record) and have a house inspection that my house has fire extinguishers, fire alarm, carbon monoxide alarm .
whilst I understand parents concerns for language students the total immersion staying with a family is really helpful. Exchanges made experience much more affordable and accessible than trips are nowadays - back in the day the only cost was the air fare and the coaches from school to the airport.

This is in the UK

When I was at school we did a couple of exchanges in European countries and my dc went on exchanges from UK to Canada. In both, the school arranged it so that one or two teachers went along too. A smallish group of kids stayed with individual host families. During the time away, we'd meet up regularly as a group/go on joint day trips. If there was a problem, our own teachers were easily contacted and would check in to see that all was ok with host family. From a safeguarding aspect, the trips my dc went on were better than those that my school organised. It was a great experience though travelling out/back as a group and having that contact with known teachers while out there did make it less daunting.

Oh that’s interesting that a teacher went too - part of my worry is that he’ll just be sent off on his own with no one there if things go wrong, and at least a minimum 9 hour flight away.
He’s travelled lots before (we’re from the U.K. and we have been back and forth a heap) and he’s 15, not a little kid, but still a child!

Yes, a teacher went too on my DC's exchanges. They all stayed separately with different families though.

I second what was said by a previous poster. UK school exchanges have been phased out now, due to heightened awareness of child protection issues. I went on plenty as a child and had only good experiences. The rules when I used to organise them were that families were dbs checked (criminal record and for working with children) and there was a teacher with the group, but other than that there aren‘t a lot of safeguards. Any children / families that wanted to take part, could. We never had any serious incidents that I’m aware of, but for example one girl was taken for a ride on a motorbike without having first asked permission from parents, which obviously parents were not happy about. To be fair that was the worst thing that happened…

My DC is going on two exchanges over the next year (European countries, we're in the UK, state school). We've been DBS checked and DC is regularly whats-apping their exchange partners. Exchange partners come here first and then our school group return with a couple or teachers in tow (but all stay with different host families). My DC is really excited, I'm pretty nervous but they have a phone, are fairly sensible and I know will have the time of their life. I went on exchanges in the 90s with no phone, no email and loved it.

I don't know how exchanges work in Aus, but I run an exchange every year from my UK school. I've done ones to France and Germany. There is no way that we would be allowed to just send the students abroad unaccompanied! We have to take one staff member per 10 students. We spend all day on weekdays with the students- either in the exchange school or out on day trips. The students are with their host families in the evening and over the weekend, but we are on-call on our school phones 24 hours a day if there is a problem.

There hasn't been a problem with the host families in the 4 years I've been doing exchanges at this school. When the French/German students come here, our host families have to be DBS checked. There is no equivalent checking process for the French/German families. This does put some of our parents off allowing their dc to take part, but for most who don't take part, that isn't the reason.

My kids attend an international school in the UK & exchanges are a massive part of its programme & why lots of people choose it. They do about 10 short exchanges over the 7 year groups each year, then long-term exchanges of 8 weeks-3 months if your child is selected (top % of language class). They also offer work experience abroad for Year 12 & those students stay with families.

DS1 has been on 2, to France & Spain. He loved both although did not get on with the French child & family. He is in daily contract with the Spanish child & went to see them on his own last summer & has been invited on holiday with them this year. I am in WhatsApp contact with the mum & we are also planning to meet up. They stayed in individual families but met up each day as a group for trips etc.

As a hosting family, we also really enjoyed it & found that we benefited from the language & culture ourselves. We were not DBS checked for it although do have to disclose any convictions as well as smoking etc.

We are a family of keen linguists & have found this benefits in a way that no other trip or holiday can. Plus it's cheaper. If it were not for languages I can see it might not be as valuable.

I went on an American exchange with my school in year 10. We were matched with pen pals who we emailed back and forth, then added to bebo/myspace etc (showing my age) spoke on msn messenger and got to know each others families for months. Then my partner came to us (about 15 kids and several teachers) for about 10 days and stayed in our home. The following year we went and stayed with the same partner and their families in New York State.

I’ve no idea what sort of vetting of each family was done, if anything! But me and my exchange partner remained in regular contact for years. It was great experience on both sides. Going on a real yellow school bus and walking down a “locker filled hall” filled with cheerleaders and jocks was everyone’s highlight, the Americans thought we were mental. Equally they thought our houses and cars were so tiny, and kept getting us to say different words, asking us how well we knew the queen and Harry Potter haha

One of mine went to France, French girl came to stay with us. After the first night I got a phone call from the teacher organising the exchange offering me money to have another girl come and stay as she was upset where she was. I said I'd be happy but I didn't have anywhere for her to sleep. She didn't care so I asked our guest and she said they'd share. So I had two of them sharing a single bed for a week.

Never believe anyone who says French kids aren't fussy eaters, these two were the fussiest kids and pretty well lived on crisps and pain au Chocolat.

I never found out what went wrong but I will say it was probably the longest week of my life.