Child maintenance application, what do I do?

[BlueWhale21]

So basically my partner left me and a week later I found out I was pregnant, back story I already had a child from a previous relationship and this relationship was new and was only a few months in, maybe 4? I was shocked, upset and a little confused as he had blocked me, totally ghosted me out of no where. I got excited as I wanted a second baby at some point and thought this was my chance as my 4 year old (at the time) has special needs and the older she gets the harder it would be to manage her and a baby. I booked a private scan for 9weeks and saw my tiny baby and heard the heart beat. I got home sat in the car and called him using no caller id. He answered and I told him it was me and I was pregnant, he told me he didn’t want a baby he wasn’t ready and asked if I would have an abortion. I told him mentally I couldn’t go through with an abortion and I really wanted a second baby and was sorry that it wasn’t what he wanted but he had a right to know I was pregnant and I didn’t plan on relying on him for money. That was it, never heard from him again. When she was born a few months ago I used a friends phone to text him to say our baby had been born. Nothing, read and ignored. Everyone has been pressuring me to apply for child maintenance as he should pay for her. Do I apply and make him pay or should I leave it as he didn’t want her and I said he didn’t have to? I have no idea what to do someone please help

Go through CMS. Let them contact him. Of course he needs to pay for his daughter. The money is for her not you. If you don't need it put it into an ISA for her.

I think you should leave it. He ghosted you before he found out and he made it clear that he didn’t want it. The main reason why you kept it is because you wanted another child. Yes, he should have taken precautions, but you have more of a responsibility too than he does Because you’re the mum and the baby’s gonna be growing in your body and you will always be the default parent.

If the child was wanted from the start I would say, definitely get every single penny you’re entitled to. We are lucky to have access to abortion in the UK For free - If your conscience meant that you couldn’t go through with it, then you have to live with the consequences of that. The child has just only one parent because of your decision. No doubt you will do your best and the child will probably have a great life with you but that absence of the other parent is going to have a gaping hole in their life, And you chose that for them Because you wanted to have another child ultimately.

That’s just what I think though and I’m sure many other posters will disagree and say yes get it, it’s for the child. Sorry I don’t mean to be mean I know you just want what makes life easier for you and children.

What contraception were you using? I only ask because it does sort of sound like you planned this? Maybe I'm harsh!

Personally I think it would be unfair to claim - but others will disagree, probably strongly.