Do you start things and never finish them / stick with it?! If so what is wrong with you?

[BrainNuked]

I do this with every single thing. It can be a course, learning the piano, taking exercise classes, taking multivitamins, doing my physio, lasering my legs, reading with my dc, - it can range from not so important stuff to very important stuff but it doesn't matter, I'll throw myself into research and book things / buy stuff and don't last more than a month tops.

I'm sick of it. Why do I do this? What is wrong with me and more importantly how the fuck can I stick to a thing just even ONE thing at this point would be amazing.

I don't have ADHD or not autistic I don't think. I really don't understand it. I think I have been like this as a kid but it wasn't so bad then, it's much worse now as an adult.

DH does and he has ADHD and possible autism.

Isn't this pretty average human behaviour? You finished GCESs/A-levels presumably, and when you were pregnant you did all the stuff they told you to.
As an adult you have more to do, and you are possibly doing the typical mum thing of putting yourself and your health last (looking at the physio and vitamins).
Regarding the reading with your kids, you can pick it up tonight again if you want. It doesn't lose value if you don't do it every day.

You're excited by the learning and not the mastery. This is me too. I love to learn how to do a new thing, but not interested in then spending time mastering it. I went back to art again and started an art class. I realized I love the class because I'll do something that takes 2 hours start to finish, but the idea of working on the same thing for hours and hours over days or weeks to make it perfect makes me so bored. Maybe it's ADHD, or just a trait that's also seen in ADHD, but I don't beat myself up about it now.

I do this. Probably ADHD but I'm not diagnosed.

Yes and ADHD!

Yes, I do this relentlessly. It can be really important things too. And then I get this sort of paralysis where I’ll wake up at 4 am and catalogue all the things I need to finish and it’s like a mountain of failure.
Agree with the excitement of learning and the crushing boredom of mastery.
I’d describe myself as a dilettante. I can do lots of things a bit ( sometimes quite surprising things)but excel at nothing.
Sorry, I have no advice!

I also do this and I don’t think there’s anything ‘wrong’ with me. I think it used to be seen as normal. Otherwise everyone would be a virtuoso musician, multi linguist ultra marathon runner. We try things and then move on.

This. You’re interested in the initial bit of learning only. I don’t think there’s anything wrong with it as long as it’s not damaging you or anyone else. A bit of me thinks it’s admirable — I’m a finisher at all costs. Which I need to be (I write novels, and no editor wants something half done), but I do appreciate people who listen themselves and recognise they are bored and stop.

Dh had inattentive adhd...

I do this including at work where I will start a job and not finish it. I am even aware of it as I am doing it and it doesn’t stop me. I’ve always been like it. Not adhd to my knowledge. I see it as boredom/laziness/can’t be bothered/too much effort/not important/extreme procrastination.

Everyone does this to some extent. It’s part of human nature so there’s nothing ‘wrong’ with you. Thats why there are so few masters in anything because the rest of us lose interest or have to divert it to other things.

Once you think how many weeks or weekends you actually have before you die, but morbid but it works, it gets easier to narrow down what you want to do and learn for your own enjoyment

I donated all my family heirloom knitting stuff because I have no interest in the amount of time it will take to learn, master and make one jumper.

Tell yourself you cannot buy anything new you have enough. Get rid of things that you will never get round to or just don’t enjoy. See where you are then.

The burning desire to be good at something and the realisation that I’m not good at anything.

I'm like this too and always have been. I thought/think it's just my personality tbh but maybe there is a touch of ADHD? I thought it would be better when I retired but no, still too many interests, fingers in too many pies, that I never settle at anything for long. I do find that if what Im doing is for someone or an organisation I can stick to it better. I'm certainly not going to go for a formal diagnosis in my late 60's though.

Yes this is me! Pretty sure I do have undiagnosed ADHD as I exhibit many other traits.

However, I do think recognising theses behaviours helps you to reconcile that with yourself and make changes. For instance, I do know that I'm useless as taking supplements but I know that they make me feel better so I make sure that they become part of my routine which is easily accessible (vitamins by the kettle, taken first thing with my morning coffee) . This is the same for Duolingo (3 years in now). As long as I keep the systems in place then it works.

The other thing that I also struggle with is the routine-isation of things. If I have managed to routinise something I can make it stick. But if I have to remember to do it, it never works. That's why I remember to take the medication I take every night before bed (it's attached to my bedtime routine) and never the morning supplements as they are not (the morning can go in different directions). So can you attach anything important to a routine? E.g. reading to the kids is attached to bedtime. My goal for 2026 is to get more things important to me into a routine.

I don't think there's anything wrong with me, but I am curious. About lots of things. Sometimes I just want to research or learn something to satisfy my curiosity; I might be super into it for a few weeks, then I've read enough and I'll go on to something else. I've accepted I'll never be one of those people who gets really good at something because I'm just interested in so many things.

One thing I have committed to this year is discarding stuff that's not important and just concentrating on what I feel is the most important to me now. I'm tracking everything I spend so I can see where my money is going. That habit alone is stopping me from spending.

What's important to you OP? Are you doing these things because you think you should, or because it's what you really want to do?

Oh this is me too. DH to this day laughs about a work quiz I did about 25yrs ago. Belbin I think it was? Similar to Myers-Briggs, basically looking at what role in a team fits you. You get 3 top scores. Mine were team player and ideas person. Enthusiasm, inspiration and drive to get started and work together - no problem.

Completer finisher category however - i scored a big fat zero! I’m not that much better instinct wise all these years later but I do know it’s my tendency so anticipate it and manage it better. I’d say I’m on the adhd side of life but not diagnosable.

This is normal surely. If most of the human race was hugely dedicated and followed every task through until they were masters of it, we'd be a lot more advanced than we are!
In real life, most of us are flaky and not particularly dedicated to repetition and practice day after day.

I had to laugh at 'what is wrong with you?' 🤣

Yes, I do these things.

No, there's nothing 'wrong' with me.

Yep, I do have adhd...

However, I mitigate the cost by buying stuff preloved and then selling it and the experiences all add up.

There's another word for it, polymath, which is this minus the adhd, tho apparently means they're also good at all the things.

We're far more interesting people than people who focus on just one or two things. 😄

I don't know what's wrong with me. I assume I'm just largely a lazy shit at adulting person who needs to try harder but doesn't know how.

The vast majority of people who do this won’t have anything ‘wrong’ with them. It’s a very normal human behaviour.