Does the quality of past partners affect your attraction to someone?

[bumptybum]

so I tend to find if a man has had relationships and other moments of intimacy with women who i don’t align with then this can affect how much I look at them with interest.

If he appears to have little discernment or selectivity then no matter how good looking and nice he appears to be, I feel he’s a bit desperate or validation seeking from just any woman out there and just not very picky. And that makes me feel like there is no specific interest or investment in me. I could just be anyone. I want someone picky who chooses me and I choose them.

Basically if he’s dated down it puts me off.

is that a fair thing to notice about someone? That they are unselective?

Please go into some faux outrage. We ALL know there are types of people we don’t feel align with us.

How do you know he’s unselective? Because you don’t think his previous partners are good enough? It sounds like maybe you have some self esteem issues of your own and want to feel validated by being selected alongside women you feel are more socially valued. Or maybe you only want to date a man who’s dated women you find attractive. Some self reflection is needed before you get into any relationship I think.

I’m exactly the same. Went on a date with a guy who seemed to date absolutely anyone because he was desperate for a family. I wasn’t a woman to him, I was a walking womb. Massive ick.

My last partner put me off men, he treated me so bad crawl just awful 10 log years of hell, i swore i would stay single if i got away from him.
That was 13 year ago im still single and love it.
There is good men out there but i have no interest in any and i doubt i ever will.

Im happy on my own doing my own thing in my own time in my own bubble.