Have to fly but scared, what do you do that helps.

[Cerialkiller]

My stupid relative has gotten married again, so we've booked flights. I've managed to avoid a plane for a few years but now it's time to face it.

I'm well aware that it's the 'safest' way to travel but tell that to my monkey brain as I'm gripping the armrest every time we turn or fall, or rise....

It's in April so I have time to come up with some coping strategies. Flight isn't long enough for sleeping pills unfortunately. It's only 2.5 hours. I can't be too zogged out as will have two small children with me. DH will probably nap the whole time...Please help!

a fear of flying course?

Also going to suggest fear of flying course. Did mine with Virgin Atlantic in 2006, helped me loads.

A fear of flying course, and make sure your DH is seated next to at least one child so that he can't just nap and leave it all to you!

Ask for an aisle seat over the wing. I have a few alcoholic drinks on the flight (I rarely drink). I managed to pretty much overcome my fear of flying.

The book Soar helped me enormously. It’s a bit out of date in some ways but includes really great techniques to stop you spiralling. It’s on Amazon, the author is Tom Bunn.

There's quite a few youtube videos that explain what is happening during turbulence etc... that might help you logic your way out of it.

I tend to count to 60 as the plane takes off (I read somewhere ages ago that most problems make themselves known within the first 60 seconds of take off) and then relax a bit.

I also keep an eye out on the cabin crew and they're usually super chill and that helps.

That said when the plane shudders I fucking hate it. I've taken to muttering 'jelly on a plate' during movements thanks to one youtube video I watched :D

Also I always mention to the crew when I board that I’m a nervous flyer. They’ll come and check on you which is reassuring and nice.

By drinking!!?

I have had a stiff drink beforehand yes, can't say it made a massive difference.

I've looked at doing one, always been put off by the fact that you have to actually do some flying as part of it....😅

This is helpful. I actually sometimes enjoy takeoff and landing, the first because it's quite thrilling and also because you are 'supposed' to be shuddering and turning etc, landing because of shear relief that we will be on the ground soon.

Has anyone tried hypnosis?

To be fair to him, last time, he sat with them both and left me on my own to wallow in mystery. I usually plug head phones in and try to either read or do puzzles to occupy my brain.

Combination of:
prayer
statistical calculations of all the planes safely reaching their destinations
alcohol
noise cancelling headphones to cut out all the squeaks
a really gripping book or film
never undoing your seatbelt
Random combination but it sort of works!!

By asking for an aisle seat over the wing and having a few drinks during the flight. Yes.

I get quite very drunk 🤣 adrenaline sobers me up getting on the plane then I top up with a few drinks and am drunk again 😬

You have my sympathies, I hate flying.

Breathing exercises. I used to love flying but post kids I hate it.

Xanax. And 2 drinks. Honestly you won't care after that lol

Not for flying but for driving test anxiety, after a lot of tests and gaps in learning, stretched out from years from 17 to late 30s. It worked well enough - although not exactly for normal, non-test driving, but that wasn't the brief!

I have a few very large glasses of wine

Hypnosis worked for me. Best £50 I ever spent, this was about 25 years ago so probably more expensive now.

Actually, in 1999 during a flight to New York, I went into the cockpit and sat with the pilots for a while. That helped but obvs. is not possible now! They were so relaxed and reassuring. Just took a few more short haul flights to overcome it totally.

Aisle seat over the wing is what helps me most.

You don’t have to. I think two from my course didn’t do it. It’s only about 45 minutes at the very end. It’s honestly some of the best money I’ve spent.

Why aisle seat over the wing? Less bouncy?

Yes and it really helped. Only needed one session. I sent the hypnotherapist a postcard from my holiday!

You can do it as an online course. No need to do the flight part. I did one through EasyJet when my GP surgery stopped prescribing diazepam, and I agree with others that it was helpful, although I did think it was expensive and I think it’s possible that some of the info maybe available on YouTube. In the end I found a private GP who was happy to prescribe my diazepam, given I only take one 2 mg tablet and have taken it without issue for 20 years. I wouldn’t want to feel I had to drink alcohol for a 7 am flight.