What shall I ask for from DP for my 40th birthday?

[ChewedEar]

I turn 40 in a few months.

DH's asked me to let him know any 'big' ideas I have.
I have none.

I suggested books but he wasn't at all impressed. That's not a 'big' idea.

Holidays or nights away aren't an option.
I don't want jewellery or keepsake stuff.
A spa day sounds like my idea of hell.
I hate the theatre.
I suspect he'll book a table at a fancy restaurant anyway.

What did you get from your DP for your 40th? What do you wish you'd got?

Please help me with some inspiration 😂

Afternoon tea? West end show? Concert tickets?

Have you got any hobbies?

My main hobby is reading, hence the books suggestion 😂

I go to the gym a lot and do crafting. I told DP a few years back not to buy me any more craft stuff - I'm inundated and need to finish current projects first.

What about a kindle?

I did a tandem sky dive for mine.

I got a picture by a local artist. I treasure it, 25 years later.

I chose my favourite restaurant - Greenhouse in Mayfair. I had truffle risotto and champagne. It was magnificent. I can still taste it 8 yrs later.

Some really nice gym wear that you wouldn't treat yourself to or a great pair of trainers?
My husband did me a book treasure hunt once. That was lovely.
A wine tasting evening?
A day out in a city you've always wanted to visit including a luxurious lunch.
A national trust type place with a walk and a pub lunch?

Trip to literary festival/ hay festival?

A “day off” planned by him, he organises everything, you do nothing.

These are great suggestions, thank you.

We can't stray too far from home because we've an elderly dog that we can't leave for too long. So if it was an 'activity', it'd have to be just a few hours.
If we could get away, I think DH would just book a trip somewhere random (UK or abroad) and that'd sort it. But we can't.

If what you love is books just tell him a “big” gift voucher for your favourite book shop.

It will be the gift that keeps giving for months and months

A Welsh wool blanket https://melintregwynt.co.uk/collections/throws-blankets?gadsource=1&gadcampaignid=22648031182&gclid=Cj0KCQiA4eHLBhCzARIsAJ2NZoKEPkM8XAlqKB-7pmoYWrT0Ykiiq5JS2AP1V17TAo-tHLKjW8zVBfwaArunEALwwcB

Edited to add- I choose the exact one myself.

@frozendaisy He's absolutely ideologically opposed to vouchers as gifts for close family so that'd never fly.

Sessions with some kind of expert/guru in whatever your passion is right now?

You sound like me, except I love weekends away!

I do think something memorable is lovely. Things I would like:

a) a trip to Chelsea flower show or Jekka’s herb farm

b) an indoor hydroponic kit with grow lights or a small glass greenhouse for my garden

c) a new bicycle

d) a cat

e) a beautiful upgrade to bedside lights - it has made my room feel snug and looks really great. Cost about £140 so not cheap!

I suggested books but he wasn't at all impressed. That's not a 'big' idea.
If that's what you want that's what he should get you. Why is he trying to make your birthday an additional admin task for you making you come up with ideas that fit his prescribed list? People are utterly weird about birthday presents.

I got a really nice DAB/apps radio for the kitchen - compact but with decent speakers - it’s on now - anything you want to listen to streamed through nice speakers

Honestly - tell him you want to do the “Birthday Book Challenge” - I did it for my mum and she loved it. I took her to a giant Waterstones (so it was a day trip for us and included a nice lunch and day out), she got 5 minutes to browse and then 5 minutes to put as many books as she could carry into baskets, she ended up with something ridiculous like 60 books 😂 cost me a fortune! It was her favourite present for a long time, something she actually enjoys too.

Dont let him dictate what he buys for you based on his preferences of a trip! It doesn’t need to be “big”, it needs to be something you want otherwise it’s not a gift for you.

Dream reading chair?

Book subscription? https://www.independent.co.uk/extras/indybest/books/best-book-subscription-boxes-b2130796.html

This sounds fun

do a reconnaissance mission day before

Because he buys me about 10 books every birthday, Easter and Christmas anyway. Because I buy myself about three new books each month.

Books are pretty ordinary presents and purchases in our house and he wants to do something special.

This sounds insane. I love it.

Please can you tell me more about the bedside lighting upgrade?

I was just thinking about lighting in our house yesterday. Its all very nice and perfectly functional but lacking something.