DD struggling mentally due to year 11 pressure.

[LostTooManyScrews]

My daughter is in Year 11 and has been finding things increasingly difficult from a mental health point of view due to academic pressure. She has been struggling with sleep and has spoken about feeling suicidal and having thoughts of self-harm, although she has not acted on these. She is currently on the CAMHS waiting list and has contacted the crisis team several times. On advice from the school, we also attended A&E, where she was seen by the crisis team, and a follow-up is due next week. She does receive some counselling support in school, although this can be inconsistent due to demand.

The school day currently looks like this:
8:30am–3:00pm school day
3:00pm–4:00pm after-school Masterclass
4:00pm–5:00pm travel home
Homework in the evening, which can take between 1–2 hours depending on the subject and how she is coping.

A few months ago, because of concerns around her mental health, I agreed with the school that she would only attend Masterclasses for core subjects. This meant that in one week she attended one Masterclass, and in the alternate week she attended three. This arrangement was intended to reduce pressure and help her manage more effectively.

Recently, my daughter came home quite upset and stressed, saying there had been discussions about increasing her Masterclasses. When I contacted the teacher, I was told this had not happened and that it would be discussed with my daughter. However, following this, my daughter was told that the school would like her to increase her Masterclasses to five per fortnight rather than the three currently agreed.

In addition, she has been told she is expected to complete two revision spreadsheets each evening alongside homework. If the work is incorrect, she is required to redo it, and if it is not completed or handed in, this results in a two-hour detention on a Friday.

I am trying to balance supporting her education with protecting her mental health and would really appreciate others’ thoughts on whether these expectations feel reasonable in the context of a child who is already struggling.

Cut the masterclasses completely and let her be happy. Nothing is worth this level of pressure and unhappiness.

Having to take my child to A&E because she was in such crisis would make me tell the school to stuff the masterclasses.

@LostTooManyScrews when is she having any fun, socialising with friends etc outside of school.

I’d cut the masterclasses. I’d also speak to the school on the revision spreadsheets. Has she the ability to set her own revision pattern?

I agree with this! That schedule and level of homework sounds absolute overkill for the poor girl!

Not having a go at you OP - is all this completely for HER benefit or is it to help make the school look good in league tables???
Hope things improve for her, can’t imagine how hard it is for you OP xxx

DD was under private therapy thanks to ASD burnout in Y10 and Y11. I would have told the school where to put their requests if they had pressured DD.

If my child had to phone a crisis hotline, then a school can keep their opinion about extra sessions and revision worksheets for themselves.
Could you get a GP letter that due to her mental health she is not able to attend?
Have you shared the CAMHS waiting list/crisis calls with the school's SENCO?

Unfortunately schools love to put pressure on their students for GCSEs and I could imagine that the average pupil could benefit from these sessions. But I would strongly advocate that your DD is not one of them.

What are they teaching in these 'Masterclass' sessions that they're not teaching in ordinary class time? 8.30-4 + travel time at either end of it is a long day, especially with homework and revision spreadsheets on top of that. When does she have time to eat, shower, attend any extracurricular clubs, socialise with friends and just wind down?

If the pressure is bad now, I dread to think how much more they will pile on when it comes to exam season... and please don't let your DD suffer as part of this school's collateral damage, OP. Stress, lack of sleep and all of the other associated physical symptoms will not help her performance in exams, nor her MH in the long-run.

I agree with the poster saying get a doctor’s note. Have them write that they recommend dropping materclasses, revision spreadsheets and any or all other additional classes or revision sesssion beyond what falls in normal school hours and as standard homework.

If my child continued to struggle so much they were suicidal I would consider the possibility of withdrawing them from school and allowing them to sit their GCSEs privately. I am not sure from a legal perspective what the homeschooling requirement is for a 15 year old, but at that level of danger I wouldn’t care. I would do it anyway. And I think as soon as she turns 16 she doesn’t legally have to be there.

I would get very serious with school and raise a formal concern about the school increasing pressure on a student who is known to be seriously ill.

Use the formal complaints policy and send the concern in writing to the school head.

You can request agreement that a) any change to arrangements must be agreed with you and b) masterclasses are optional.

I have a child gcse year and forecasted top grades and there is none of this pressure. Yes there are some optional extra revision classes. But they are
optional. Homework a couple of times
a week but never seems to be take more then 20-30 mins. Hes at the gym 3-4 times a week. Football trains twice a week. Out with friends 1-2 times (mostly
weekends). It all feels pretty well balanced. Personally id rather he had balance and was enjoying life and happy and slightly lower grades.

I'd be absolutely livid with a school that continues to keep piling on the pressure despite knowing she has crisis-level mental health problems at the moment.

Please tell the school they can stick their masterclasses where the sun don't shine.

What actually are the master classes?

some schools run extra GCSEs outside of normal school hours which the students have to sign up for - additional maths is commonly taught this way, and some schools do Latin or modern languages this way.

if it’s something like that then I’d recommend dropping out.

some GCSEs like art, photography or DT you have to do a lot of coursework and create a whole portfolio. Again, it’s common for teachers to offer lunchtime and after school slots to access the art studio/DY area so students can get on with their portfolio as often this can’t be done at home.
if she’s doing one of these subjects and needs to keep going to the art studio to eg make her ceramics then she should probably keep going to these.

finally, most schools run revision sessions at lunchtime and afterschool. Usually these are optional for some students (the ones on track and doing ok) and mandatory for others (the ones who are on the borderline of failing). It’s quite common for a grade 3/4 student to be put into mandatory revision sessions for most or all of their GCSEs as the teacher of each subject thinks they are capable of passing with a bit more work. It puts a massive amount of pressure on them.

if this is the case I’d look at keeping English and maths (because she’ll have to resit those if she doesn’t pass) and drop the rest.

I agree with everything others have said. Also would she benefit from a few days off? Would you be able to be around to give her some tlc rather than her be alone? Let her know that nothing is more important than her wellbeing. The school care more about grades than they do about her - for you the opposite is true.

I also think you need to challenge the homework and detention sanction for a child that is suicidal. Write to the head. Cc governors/local authority safeguarding/ her GP. Their behaviour is not OK at all.

I agree with other that’s it’s too much. I would be asking that she drop ALL Masterclasses, (except for Maths and English if there a chance she might fail).
At the end of the day good mental health is more important than high grades. Also the revision worksheets plus homework feels far too much - is it a particularly high pressure school?

My DD and DS were never put under this much pressure. Yes there were additional classes after school but only once or twice a week.

Appalling of the school to pile on extra pressure with so called Masterclasses. Are these for the high achievers? Or booster classes for those needing help to pass? She'll likely achieve more without that additional mental pressure. Tell the school she will not be attending and they need to allow her some headspace. Schools cannot mandate out of hours lessons - these are surely optional, even if recommended.

If the school are insistent, perhaps they could run them online and allow kids to get home.

This is ridiculous.
If school carries on like this she'll collapse and won't manage the GCSEs at all.

I'd ask for a meeting with the head of year 11, and try to get the pressure and extra work all removed.

Plus an hour travel each way?!