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Intervene or not in drama with DB and SIL?

4 replies

sisterinlawproblem · 17/01/2026 13:15

We went out last night for a meal and drinks with DB, SIL, and a couple of other friends . SIL was a bit quiet during the meal but nothing unusual. Later on in the evening she seemed extremely uncomfortable/ agitated ? Didn’t seem to like DB talking to one of our other (female) friends and I think she kept texting DB rather than talking to him ?

Not long after that there were a couple of women just having a dance nothing out of the ordinary nothing you’d worry about and she said something to him then abruptly just grabbed him and turned him away ??? 10 mins later they said they were going and there was a terrible atmosphere and DB looked really unhappy.

Im seeing him later (SIL won’t be there as she’s working). Do I say something ? I’m worried that she’s got extreme jealousy or something as he looked really unhappy but then part of me worries what if something has happened (he’s not the type but I was thinking what if he’s cheated and she’s upset about it and that’s makes her jealous)

She really manhandled him though it looked really wrong?

She’s always been a bit ‘off’ , very quiet most of the time with the occasional sudden opinionated outburst. They always seem to have an atmosphere around them if that makes sense ? Other than that nothing of concern I’m aware of but last night was very uncomfortable. Do I do or say something or keep out?

OP posts:
Mistletoeiggi · 17/01/2026 13:16

"Is everything ok with you and sil? You know I'm always here if you want to talk"

TheLightSideOfTheMoon · 17/01/2026 13:17

I think it would be kind to ask if he’s okay.

DilemmaDelilah · 17/01/2026 13:21

I'm going against the flow here. I would NOT ask him anything... but I would give him the opportunity to talk to me if he wanted to.

I'm autistic, so perhaps my viewpoint is different, but I would be absolutely mortified if my sister was asking questions about whether my marriage was OK. I'm fact I would be mortified to know that anyone had noticed it might not be OK.

Lmnop22 · 17/01/2026 13:45

I would probably ask if he was OK and maybe ask after SIL so he has the opportunity to tell you things if he wants to knowing you’ll listen.

But I wouldn’t mention having detected an atmosphere or ask about the state of the relationship because he would likely be embarrassed to know people noticed an argument/atmosphere and you don’t know what’s going on in the relationship other than that he hasn’t reached out to you to tell you so clearly it’s something they’re working through as a couple.

Be supportive and open rather than curious.

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