Weight

[Swedishh]

I’ve slowly lost a stone and a half over 9 months, so now just in the healthy bmi range. Exercising most days and mostly eating healthily. My colleague (who I like) has said i ‘look gaunt’ and her good friend insinuated that I had an eating disorder. Initially their comments made me feel self conscious and rubbish. Also felt strange that they have been talking about me. We are very different eating and exercise wise but I’d never discuss it.

Jealousy

Yep, jealous

ii have such a soft spot for both these colleagues, I had hoped they would be supportive of my health improvements.

Are they fat OP?

Reply that you are only just into a healthy BMI and therefore not even close to being underweight and sadly people have lost sight of what healthy looks like

Not your problem. She is the one who has a problem.

Not long ago, a relative told me I had an eating disorder because I enjoy salads and fresh veg. Some years ago I lost six stone, and since then, have maintained a bmi of 19.5. She eats junk food takeaways about every second day, and has a bmi of 39 and rising.

I was going to suggest jealousy too, but it depends. If you went from 11 and a half stone to 10 stone, then you're unlikely to look 'gaunt.' But if you went from 10 stone to 8 and a half stone, you may do. Depends on your height and build and all sorts of varying factors. My DH has dieted on and off over the years, (he is 5 ft 9 and a half,) and he has been between 10 stone and 16 stone - over the past 35 years. The best weight for him is 12 and a half to 13 and a half stone.

When he dropped to between 10 stone, and 10 and a half stone, he looked awful. He looked like he needed to be hospitalised! Gaunt, and haggard and very pale. Just doesn't suit him.

Same with me. I am 5 ft 4, and whilst I am supposed to be 8 st 5 to 8 st 10 according to 'experts' I look awful at that weight. Gaunt, and drawn, and ill. My ideal weight to look healthy and 'nice' is 10 st 2 to 10 st 11.

So yeah, it's possible you may look gaunt @Swedishh but you haven't said what your height is, (or what your weight was before,) so it's hard to know if a stone a half weight loss is a bit much for you.

Still, it was quite rude of them to comment anyway.

Same with me. I am 5 ft 4, and whilst I am supposed to be 8 st 5 to 8 st 10 according to 'experts' I look awful at that weight. Gaunt, and drawn, and ill. My ideal weight to look healthy and 'nice' is 10 st 2 to 10 st 11.

People say this a lot on Mumsnet (although less now that WLI are a thing), yet I've never seen anyone looking 'gaunt, drawn or ill' at 8 and a half stone when they're 5ft 4.

And if you were 10st 11lbs you would be very firmly in the overweight category.

Just in healthy BMI won’t look gaunt at any height and build but we really are losing touch with healthy so people think those of normal weight are skinny and gaunt when in fact they are healthy. Fat has been so normalised that gaunt sometimes just means no visible fat

Yeah. I’m about that height and weight and don’t look gaunt lol My friends at the same height are a similar weight I’d guess.

You know you don’t look gaunt if you’re only just in the healthy weight range. Ignore them.

I’ve lost a stone and a half and almost at a BMI of 24. Ideally I’d like to have a BMI of 22 for general health and to improve my running speed, while maintaining power for weight sessions at the gym.

My colleagues have a much higher BMI and are both sedentary. We don’t chat about either of these factors, it’s non of my business.

They are fat
they don’t like to see another fat woman becoming less fat so say things to sabotage it in the hope you stay fat like then
old as time x

They are delusional
and quite rude

so really what they think doesn’t matter

Thanks to all the posters, I’m feeling much better about things now. It really undermined my self confidence for a few days