Are teenage boys turning away from porn?

[Libre2]

I had a chat with my 17 year old DS this evening. He has always been open about trying not to look at porn and we have had his phone and iPad locked down - latterly at his request. He said tonight though that a lot more people online are becoming anti-porn and his friends don’t use it.

If this is true, I feel quite heartened. Has anyone else heard this?

It sounds like something he might say if he wanted his phone not to be locked down anymore....

No he would just have to ask for that.

The very last thing I would expect from a teenage boy would be the truth about porn.

My 15yo tells me he doesn’t watch porn. He was very scathing about about the age verification as your average teenager could get around it in about two minutes which made me a bit 🧐 I’m fairly convinced though.

I think there’s a more conservative streak among Gen Alpha(?) things like dopamine fasting and such have been very popular online.

I think it’s important to presume our teenage boys do watch it to some extent. Then as uncomfortable as it is, talk to them about how what they see for the most part isn’t part of normal healthy relationships.

talk to them about the industry and the very negative side that isn’t seen, and talk to them about how it can affect real life relationships and make women feel.

difficult conversations, but necessary in this day and age.

All men watch it and I believe the starting age now is around 13. I know he’s your son and so you see the best in him but he’ll be watching it somewhere, believe me.

My ex of 7 years swore blind he hated it, he was a feminist blah blah blah. Anyway, turned out he was a huge addict which is why I left him.

Not sure what the best way forward is for you other than talking about the harms of it.

It’s another example of American Christian right wing values spilling over here. A lot of it is presented as well meaning but I’d keep an eye on what ‘influencers’ he’s watching. A lot of it is tied up in misogyny, homophobia and racism.

No, I think it is a thing, and it’s nothing to do with American Christians!
Basically in my sons school they did a lot of work in health ed about the effects of porn on men(ED etc) as well as issues of consent/ trafficking.
A lot of younger men seem to see porn as pretty grim and something seedy older men do.
Besides, there is a lot of titillating content on Insta etc and if you are a 17 year old boy that’s probably stimulating enough!
In my experience it’s men of 30-50 who are the most corrupted and addicted although most of my older friends and men in my life have given up- and it’s them who have mentioned this I wouldn’t ask.
My husband said he mainly stopped watching it when it stopped looking like sex and started looking like violence. We are pretty open about it, and he is gonna do what he likes (as men always do) but I think I do actually believe him.

I’d NEVER trust a man who described himself as a feminist!

I’ve got sky tv in our house which gives us our internet. I’ve got parental controls so if any of us using the internet type in anything remotely porny it won’t look for it. I had a conversation with my husband about it recently. That if sky can exert that control over what comes into our home why can’t the government crack down harder on what comes into schools etc?

I wouldnt class porn as one level, it take from the conversation that it may not be totally true or that it is all porn that is being discussed. The hardcore porn that unfortunately many teenagers are exposed to reduces the impact of seeing previous generations definition of porn.

Yes, it can be. I'm sure there are positive elements but there is this.

Generally the 'No Fap' US movement seems focused on men not being weakened by maturating rather than the harm caused by porn to women.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/NoFap

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/No_Nut_November

All you need is a free VPN app to bypass this unfortunately.

personally i just read literotica / erotic fiction as much more politically correct and morally correct

we could have internet controls, but then its society or big business that would be against it.

My ds is 20 and appalled at the exploitative porn industry and doesn’t use it. He has had a fully unlocked phone with unlimited data and no parent controls etc since he was 11. And has my card data so he can buy stuff on his phone. So he can/could access or buy anything he wanted. The reason it’s always been unlocked with card access also is because I have been able to trust him.

heres a random question for all, if all porn turned realistic but all Ai generated and no humans involved, would people be supportive of the creative industry that it could create ?

No. Because I still think it would offer highly unrealistic representations of what a healthy sexual relationship entails, and that is damaging for both our sons and our daughters. It is also highly addictive and causes all sorts of untold mental health issues.

For those saying that my son is lying to me, and that my husband is also lying to me (because he doesn't use porn either) then I'm sorry that you think that "all men" use porn. They really don't. I am under no illusions that my 17 year old does access it occassionally - as I said in my OP, he is trying not to use it, but my initial point was that it is something that is becoming less socially acceptable.

I know my husband doesn't use it. He found it did not help him mentally at all, so stopped.

I saw a comedian do a bit on porn and how it’s changed over the years from a couple having sex to a girl getting thrown through a window by seven guys. I have no idea who gets off on that sort of thing.