Baby won't be put down at night - what worked for you?

[slightmadness]

Ah I'd forgotten how certifiably insane the newborn phase can drive you 😅

This is our second baby - he's 11 weeks old. We thought we'd got lucky as for the first few weeks he seemed to have no problem going down to sleep in the next to me cot or pram bassinet and resettling there after feeds. Then he started to get a bit more fussy - some gas and reflux issues - before we're now at the point where he will properly sob the second he's put down to sleep anywhere that isn't on one of us.

Things we've tried without success:

• holding him asleep for 20-30 mins after each feed before putting him down (generally stops the reflux but he still wakes instantly and kicks off)
• inclining the cot (same)
• patting him and rocking the cot while he's awake (he just gets pissed)
• cuddling him in bed and gently putting him down on the mattress with an arm still round him (he notices as soon as he's down).

Last night DH managed to rock him to sleep in his pram and he did a couple of hours in there (it's approved for overnight sleep) but he then had a blowout and needed a feed and after that I couldn't get him to settle again in the pram.

Any words of wisdom other than that it will eventually pass?! Our DD was similar and we had to co-sleep in the end, but even that doesn't seem to be an option at the moment - he needs to be on us. I always read about people doing shifts with their partners, but realistically DH staying up a bit late/waking up a bit early still doesn't get me to a point where I can spend hours awake in the middle of the night without dropping off.

Honestly? I remember those times even though they were years ago but I can’t remember what I actually did! Probably tried a different thing every night in the hope that the stars aligned and something would work even as a one off. I know I co slept with a couple of my dc, walked round the house with them in their pram, kept sticking them on the boob, the dc I bottle fed I probably offered them a dummy and cuddled them next to me side by side.
Sorry I’m not more help - I’m over a decade out of it but wanted to send you all the sleep vibes I can.
Whst I do know is I had 4dc - what worked for 1 didn’t necessarily work for another but by 6 months (I know that feel ages away) all were sleeping through.

eta I have read on here people suggesting when you put them in the cot to put them feet down first rather than head. Or a t-shirt that smells of you? What about a hot water bottle on the cot sheet so that baby isn’t going from warm body heat to cooler cot?

Dd1 was like this, silent reflux was the problem. Nightmare until she was 4 months old when she improved a bit.

Chest sleeping, all the way!

Yes same as pp, my 2nd baby was like op's dc2. I called him my koala baby as he had to be vertical and carried either in the sling or in my arms...it was silent reflux and CMPA. It settled as we got the reflux under control but he's still very co-sleepy as a toddler 🙃

I swaddled the DD in a blanket before getting her to sleep in my arms before putting her in bed. I think that she stayed asleep because there wasn't that sudden temperature change from warm arms to cold(er) bed.

Other times I did have to resort to a dummy or she just wouldn't sleep. DS however could lob out of the crib the dummy from a really young age, so I didn't really use one with him.

Next to me crib - or whichever today’s equivalent is. Saved my life with my second baby! They didn’t exist with my first

I gave up trying and slept with my velcro baby until he was 3. Then he moved calmly to his own room without a backward glance.

My daughter was like this for a while. It wasn't until after I took her to a paediatrics osteopath for her slightly flat head, that it all started to piece together. She was turning to one side most of the time, hence the flat side of her head. It was linked to tension in her neck/jaw, which in turn caused feeding issues (which I didnt notice) and reflux. We literally had to burp her for 20 minutes after every feed otherwise she'd be sick.

Once we had a few adjustment appointments, she really started to improve in all areas, including her sleep. In fact, I remember her sleeping really well after the first adjustment.

Thought I'd share in case this could be the issue for you!

Unfortunate turn of phrase ?

Love to dream swaddle.

Hot water bottle to warm the mattress before you transfer.

Vibrating bouncer.

• Love to Dream swaddle
• Rolled up towel (like a long sausage) in a horse shoe shape around the baby under the fitted sheet
• Reflux meds (baby was on Gaviscon and Lanzoperazole)
• Time!

Edited to add that she also spent the first 4 months of her life in a sling, took all naps in there and had to be walked around in it for up to an hour after every night feed before attempting a cot transfer with all of the above in place. I only have one child 😬

I had this with my second baby. In the end, I chose the path of least resistance and just co-slept with her in the bed next to me. I didn't get much sleep as I'm an extremely light sleeper, but it felt like the best option at the time.

As she got older, I was able to feed her to sleep on a chair in her room and then transfer her into her cot for a few hours. After the first wake up, I'd just have to bring her back into the bed with me as she wouldn't tolerate being left. Eventually she got used to sleeping by herself in her own room and would sleep through the whole night... Took a while but we got there in the end!

White noise , especially vacuum cleaner noise. They've got it on YouTube.

I have a one year old and similar issues, she would sleep in crib and then suddenly at about 2 months old she wouldn’t be put down for naps. I tried a few things and what I think worked was making sure she was actually feeding when on the boob (are you breastfeeding?) instead of letting her doze off, I made her have a full feed on both sides and if she dozed off I switched boobs. Then I found when I put her down for a nap after being awake and fully fed, she tended to go down a bit easier, I think I only held her/ rocked her for about 10 minutes max otherwise she would wake up fully for good after a sleep cycle. When my above tactic didn’t work, I put her in the sling and did naps on the go or around the house. DD lived in her sling for the first few months. I can now say she naps well in crib and has done consistently since about 6 months.

Oh and the Merlin magic sleep suit was a game changer but I couldn’t use it in summer as it’s so warm, winter probably fine tho.

https://amzn.eu/d/5jDAzJ4