Do slow replies always signal lack of interest?

[cryingonthesaledays]

I’ve started speaking to someone I went to college with years ago.

He asks questions and when I think ‘okay, I’ll just let this conversation fizzle out’, his next reply has another question that brings up a different subject.

We have a plan to meet for a drink in the New Year.

His reply to one message each time takes anywhere from 30 mins to 24 hours.

Now, I don’t have time even though I do fancy him, to sit messaging day in day out. But I’d sort of expect a flurry of messages if that makes sense

So, a conversation might be what’s your favourite thing to do there. And in a minute you’d reply the answer, and the back and forth would maybe last 5 mins of instant responses. Then perfectly fine not to hear from them again at all for hours and hours, even a day etc

But each and every message has a delay.

I am confused because the messages aren’t dry on his part and he seems to initiate keeping it going. Plus, we’ve agreed to meet

Is this normal for now then? One close friend says yes because you haven’t met up yet, the other two say no, nobody is that busy to leave hours between reply every single message (yes, when not working in his office is the same - even worse actually. Barely any responses ever in the evening)

I feel confused because there seems to be chemistry and interest, but the drag in responses are a bit frustrating as the conversation never builds up momentum

And if I fancy someone, I am actually excited to see their messages and reply.

Important factor in this is, he works in London for a big company but does 9-5. So would be home around 7pm in the evenings

No shift work (like me) so isn’t catching up on sleep in the daytime

Your first friend is right, you haven’t even met yet!

It’s better to not have hours of texting etc before meeting, you can build up a picture of them in your head and get emotionally attached before you’ve even had a first date. Meet him, see how it goes!

Not replying in the evenings would give me pause. Is he definitely single?

I think that’s fine. All good. Just not use to it. At all. Anyone I’ve ever spoken to, be it family, friends or someone trying to date me, has always had at least one occasion where the replying back and forth is instant and not hours and hours apart each time

Oh well, I suppose we will just have to see what the situation is in person :)

I get it can feel a bit concerning if you’re not used to it, he maybe just has a different communication style.

It’s positive that he keeps the conversation going and asks you questions, when are you due to meet?

He does reply but it’s hours apart, and quicker in the daytime

It does feel unusual because I’ve never spoken to anyone one with this type of communication style. Again, I don’t want or expect constant messaging but it’s always, consistently, never a quick response