Anyone else not bothering with Xmas?

[Touty]

No decs or presents cards etc?
load of nonsense?
Anyone else?

I am opting out half way. Not sending cards but presents to some and having small Turkey by myself but sendin turkeys goood ones to family. One Christmas pot of flowers but stock up on soups. May get a simple small pannetone as I love them but the fuss is too much for this 88 year old.

I don’t think it’s a load of nonsense, but we don’t put up decorations, or do cards or presents. Neither of us need more stuff and we’ve never done presents to family members either. We are going to a friends for Christmas lunch but that’s it.

Yep no decs or tree etc BUT i have done presents and do plan to spend Xmas with family IF none of us get sick that is

Normal day for me and DH
I did it all when my DC's were young and then just decided that I didn't want to do it anymore

DH loves it, we please ourselves, my DC's & partners are still very welcome but no presents, tree, cards etc and they will still get fed as normal
I remind people once they start mentioning Christmas it to me, they soon stop 🤣

I’m envious!

Me.
I don't celebrate it.
I'm quite happy on my own just eating cheese and watching crap films on Prime.

If you don’t do Christmas why do you need to be performative about it?

Just carry on not doing it.

It would be just the two of us. No decorations, no family or friends, not going out. I’ll indulge myself with chocolates and probably binge-watch.

I/we opted out of it years ago. It's just a regular day, with the bonus of not having to go to work.

I hate it. If it wasn’t for my mum who makes such a fuss about it, I would ignore it completely.

The best Christmas I had was in 2020 when I was isolating with Covid - I felt fine - and I was home alone with M&S party good, Prosecco and baileys plus I watched whatever I wanted to whilst wearing pyjamas.

Absolutely. I have ao many traumatic memories ranging from abuse, death, domestic violence... and also as I've become peri, the mental load is just too much. 2 years ago I had a talk with my DH while pregnant. I asked him if I stopped putting in any effort at Christmas, would he take over and do everything? (Because previously I did it all) and he said he honestly wasn't bothered and could take it or leave it.

So that was that. We now have a 3 year old and we haven't celebrated Christmas.

Even this year there is death! My brother in law is dying of cancer. Last year it was my mum.

The triggers of Christmas are horrible and in Britain, it is so rammed down your throat. I am writing this from Gran Canaria. No songs, no crazy decorated shops, no adverts everywhere. It is bliss.

Already booked to come back next year!

Tonight is the solstice and I shall be watching the sun set on the shortest day of the year and in the morning, I shall sing in the new sun.

Blessings for Winter Solstice to all who mark it 🙏

If I was, I’m not, I wouldn’t be sharing my Scrooge-like misery performatively online. I would just get on with it.

Who is being performative?

It's a discussion point on a chat forum, what with it being Christmas right now.

I'd love a year off from making it happen but I've got a houseful who love it. Bloody tiring.

Ours feels like the best of both worlds. We have a tree and decorations. We’ve done all the Christmassy things like markets and lights in London and met lots of different friends. Then on 24th will fly off on a city break abroad.

Another one. Ssshhhh...just let people chat. Scroll on if you don't like.

Your post details the many reasons why you don’t want to celebrate it.

What reasons do you have for your three year old not getting a celebration as a result? Once she goes to school, and sees that it is indeed a thing, what would you say justifies her missing out?

I always think I must be doing something very wrong.

I think we have nice Christmases, but it’s just a tree, some presents for the children, mainly bought online (I’ve only visited two shops, but did that early November), and a roast dinner with the in-laws.

That’s it.

I’ve got friends who are all “running around for Christmas” and getting stressed. One who has been up until 1am most nights, “sorting things for Christmas.”

I mean, each to their own, but I just don’t get it. I’ve had a family of my own and children for 23 years now (big age gaps so have always had a little one), and I’ve never rushed about or spent loads of money.

I only do what I do for the children though. If I didn’t habe them, I wouldn’t bother with it at all.

I like the tree, the food (although not too much of it), definitely like the time off work. Meaningful gifts for loved ones.

I can live without secret santa, Christmas music everywhere, arbitrary gifts and spending, travelling to visit people, works dos, concerts, pressure, social obligations, Christmas jumper day, collections, gift sets, etc.

I would LOVE to have a Christmas entirely by my own design.

Re: the winter solstice - I always mark it in some way. I thought it was tomorrow at around 3 in the afternoon?
The 21st?

Not opting out but mixing things up a bit. We buy presents for immediate family only. For years now, me and OH don't buy fir each other as there's nothing that we want ir need. So we usually get something between us, gig tickets, meal out etc.
We're having g Christmas dinner on Christmas eve this year and then party food and pizzas on Christmas day. Boxing day will be a trip to the cinema (did this last year and lived it).

I think everyone should do what makes them happy at any time of year. I personally don’t find Christmas a chore, it’s a bit of shopping and a couple of hours of decorating a tree and the house. I would put decorations up just for me because I like them. Then 10 days of family and friends. It is much easier now the DCs are grown up and I’m not assembling some toy with a gazillion pieces at midnight on Christmas Eve though.

Not performative
I've answered the OP

Yup, same here. I’ve put a wreath over the fire mantle with some fairy lights and that’s it.

No cards, no presents for anyone other than my aged dad, no roast, no Christmas Markets (went to the Manchester one once, what an absolute rip off for a load of old tat!), no panto, no meeting up with friend or family, no nothing. Bliss.

Totally agree with that. We put the tree and Dec's up when we're really in the mood. Usually first weekend of December. I think when the kids were younger it was more stressful. Now they're 19 and 12 it's so much more relaxing

Let her make a fuss
We don't always get what we want in life do we?