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Original poster

Do you just "know" when someone's lying?

22 replies

Suitbox · 15/12/2025 12:19

I really hate being lied to, even over little things.

I seem to be able to sniff about a lie. I know when someone's lying to me, even if I'm not sure exactly what the lie is.

E.g. BF called me when I was with friends. I was about to leave, as planned. He called to tell me he'd got some food for dinner. Lovely. Except I knew he was lying. What he'd actually done was called to find out when I'd be home because he wasn't there, although it was 2 days before I realised that. Previously I just knew hed lied.

It turns out he'd been to see a friend for help with something that's been worrying him and which he hadn't told me about. Nothing sinister, no real reason to lie, except not to worry me, but also not that terrible in the scheme of things.

So the truth was fine, but he'd chosen not to tell me. He didn't exactly lie, in that he didn’t tell me he wasn't with the friend or that he was at home, but when we spoke I knew something was "off".

Obviously I know him pretty well, but I find the same thing with colleagues and aquaintances. I can feel when they're not being straight with me.

This is not necessarily a good talent to have!

OP posts:
Gasbox · 15/12/2025 12:44

Yep, I'm exactly the same! Can't bear being lied to and can tell straight away if someone isn't being honest, it's like a sixth sense. Sometimes it's a blessing, sometimes it's a curse but I always know. DH and DD have both learned it's better to just tell me the truth from the outset because I will sniff out dishonesty like a bloodhound Smile

Original poster
Suitbox · 15/12/2025 13:07

Gasbox · 15/12/2025 12:44

Yep, I'm exactly the same! Can't bear being lied to and can tell straight away if someone isn't being honest, it's like a sixth sense. Sometimes it's a blessing, sometimes it's a curse but I always know. DH and DD have both learned it's better to just tell me the truth from the outset because I will sniff out dishonesty like a bloodhound Smile

Yes, in my example it would have been much better to just accept the nice gesture of having the food bought, and leave him to tell me about the thing (which makes no difference to me) when he was ready.

But I knew...and once I know the mind goes into overdrive re what/why.

OP posts:
Gasbox · 15/12/2025 13:26

Oh yes, my mind will come up with much worse theories about what/why than the truth could ever be! Definitely easier (for everyone!) if people just tell me the truth to begin with Grin

MyKindHiker · 15/12/2025 13:36

I can’t tell with strangers but with loved ones or close friends I can tell - almost as though I’m mind reading. And I can usually guess what is the truth / reason. Especially with my kids I think it’s the same underlying instinct as knowing if something is wrong or they need me.

My mother also freakishly good at this.

BillieWiper · 15/12/2025 13:40

I feel like if I assumed someone was lying a lot of the time I just wouldn't be friends with them. Or certainly not romantic partners.

Everyone I choose to spend time with gets the benefit of the doubt that they are honest. They have no reason to lie?

Some people might smooth their opinion about something or not mention something if they thought their response could be hurtful. But I wouldn't really call that lying.

Jasmin71 · 15/12/2025 13:46

I am a polygraph in human form. Unfortunately it definitely colours my opinion of some people. It also allows me to know if someone is trying to be manipulative which is great because it means their pretence is pointless, and sometimes hilarious to watch. Watching certain people squirm as they dig their holes has become a spectator sport where I am concerned.

Original poster
Suitbox · 15/12/2025 13:46

BillieWiper · 15/12/2025 13:40

I feel like if I assumed someone was lying a lot of the time I just wouldn't be friends with them. Or certainly not romantic partners.

Everyone I choose to spend time with gets the benefit of the doubt that they are honest. They have no reason to lie?

Some people might smooth their opinion about something or not mention something if they thought their response could be hurtful. But I wouldn't really call that lying.

Yes, lovely.

But if you know, how do you give them the benefit of the doubt? There is none.

These are the small lies everyone tells.

OP posts:
BillieWiper · 15/12/2025 13:52

Suitbox · 15/12/2025 13:46

Yes, lovely.

But if you know, how do you give them the benefit of the doubt? There is none.

These are the small lies everyone tells.

Show quote history

I give them the benefit of the doubt because I don't see why they would lie? There would be no need to. Unless it is to spare someone's feelings in which case that's fine. That's just being polite.

TheNinkyNonkyIsATardis · 15/12/2025 14:07

But you don't know that you can detect all lies. You only know that you have a 100% success rate for when someone has admitted or you have discovered a lie.

You can't prove that you know, because if someone lies to you successfully, you'd never find out!

I think it's one of those things I don't get hung up on. I tend to be aware when my husband is trying to surprise me because he has zero game. He can't tell when I'm lying mostly, and I have almost given him a heart attack with three surprise parties this way.

Anonanonanonagain · 15/12/2025 15:14

I have a sixth sense almost for bullshitters and bullshitery and zero tolerance for either. I was acquainted loosely with a woman years ago who could not tell the truth if she was being scalded. Loads around us believed every thing she said but from tiny things to big things I could tell a mile off and I am being honest a few times I would feign an interest just to see how much she would add on and on to the original lie for my own amusement. She has a seriously vivid imagination, totally wasted in the field she is in.

She is not the only one that I have been able to point out they are asshats when others almost revere them which is odd to me as to me it is 100% clear when someone is a fraud.

Can I detect a lie like someone calling about a dinner maybe not, I do know when the kids lie to me though and the reasons why but I guess we are very much in tune. Maybe it is because there is an inflection in ones voice when a lie is being spouted?

Ontheirway · 15/12/2025 15:23

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frozendaisy · 15/12/2025 15:46

I can tell when H and the teens are lying or even just evading the question.

Don't really care too much if other people lie to me. It really won't affect my day-to-day existence.

ladyamy · 15/12/2025 15:55

I had a former frienemy who used to lie all the time. I used to make a sport out of trying to catch her out.

Boomer55 · 15/12/2025 15:59

Instinct, which has served me well. 👍

blankcanvas3 · 15/12/2025 16:01

I can tell when DS is lying, every single time. So much so that he’s completely given up with lying as it just doesn’t work. I get ‘feelings’ with other people, I’m usually right but not always.

HRTQueen · 15/12/2025 16:03

I can tell when ds is lying I think …

strangers at times yes I suspect they are or know from circumstances but no I would never claim I can always tell when someone is lying it’s foolish to believe you have this quality

VimesandhisCardboardBoots · 15/12/2025 16:21

Nope, I'm always pretty much oblivious and assume people are telling the truth.

I do have the opposite skill though, in that I'm an absolutely fantastic liar. I've got this really boring deadpan voice, and I'm also not much of a talker, so noone is surprised at the scarcity of details, that I'm not including so that I don't get tripped up on them later.

Unfortunately I'm a fairly honest person so it's a fairly useless skill to have.

madaboutpurple · 15/12/2025 16:34

I reckon most of us know when we are being lied to.

Gasbox · 15/12/2025 16:48

Jasmin71 · 15/12/2025 13:46

I am a polygraph in human form. Unfortunately it definitely colours my opinion of some people. It also allows me to know if someone is trying to be manipulative which is great because it means their pretence is pointless, and sometimes hilarious to watch. Watching certain people squirm as they dig their holes has become a spectator sport where I am concerned.

Yes to knowing when someone is being manipulative, and yes to it sometimes being hilarious to watch!

HRTQueen · 15/12/2025 17:08

That’s is just you having been proved right on your suspicions that’s not always knowing ….

HaveaVeryMerryBerryChristmas · 15/12/2025 22:40

Anonanonanonagain · 15/12/2025 15:14

I have a sixth sense almost for bullshitters and bullshitery and zero tolerance for either. I was acquainted loosely with a woman years ago who could not tell the truth if she was being scalded. Loads around us believed every thing she said but from tiny things to big things I could tell a mile off and I am being honest a few times I would feign an interest just to see how much she would add on and on to the original lie for my own amusement. She has a seriously vivid imagination, totally wasted in the field she is in.

She is not the only one that I have been able to point out they are asshats when others almost revere them which is odd to me as to me it is 100% clear when someone is a fraud.

Can I detect a lie like someone calling about a dinner maybe not, I do know when the kids lie to me though and the reasons why but I guess we are very much in tune. Maybe it is because there is an inflection in ones voice when a lie is being spouted?

They blink a lot, and don't quite look you in the eye. Alot to be told by body language.

NotMyRealAccount · 15/12/2025 22:48

No, I'm rubbish at it unless the lie is completely implausible. My children and my sisters quite enjoy telling me about lies they managed to slip past me years ago.

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