Starting again…

[mariemarie2011]

Hi all :). Never posted before so hope I’m in the right place!
The last 4 years have been horrendous.
I met someone who has completely destroyed me and my life. Finally got him out of my life back in may but I’m feeling completely lost!
I’ve been left jobless, friendless, penniless and 5 stone heavier (mix of control and illness).
I really just need to know it’s possible to start again at 39?
Need a confidence boost and positivity to know I can go into the new year feeling better than I do now.
x

Anyone?

Really well done for getting rid of him. I think the hard part is over. The future's an open book for you now. Decide what you want, make a plan and go get it.

If you can get as far as you have already then you can do anything.

It's completely possible ! 😊

But tackle one thing at a time. Job would be the best place to start because that will help with penniless and hopefully friendless.

What job did you do before?

One step at a time.
Get to enjoy being just you again.
Your future awaits...

i definitely feel the hard part is over @SeaAndStars
determined not to go into the new year and take all of the baggage of this year with me!

I miss working. I’d spent years working my way up in hospitality industry @Laiste The hotel I worked for thought i deserved a promotion but had no opening so actually created a role for me. I was put on a training course to progress then met him and he convinced me I deserved a break and I could rely on him. Biggest mistake of my life! But I’d rather have to start again than stay with him.

Of course you can start again at 39, you can start again at any age, we should never let our age trap us into settling for shitty relationships

well done for getting rid, take some time to look back on where you were to where you are now-huge congratulations for that. As PP said find a job first, that’ll get you out there meeting people which will keep the ball moving in the right direction

I’m sure you’ll have wobbly moments, just feel what you need to, sad, angry, resentful. Sit with those feelings, you didn’t deserve to be hurt like that and that’s exactly why you got out so dust yourself off and keep moving, you’ve got this

wishing you a lovely Christmas, 2026 is going to be your year xx

@cheerfulaf ive definitely done some reflecting and realised I feel less lonely now than I did being with him.
Im bot going to rush into finding anybody else. As you said 2026 is going to be my year and I’m going to find myself!
Ive sat and felt sorry for myself so much the last couple years. I’m now looking at this as an opportunity to do all the things I’ve missed x

Ah, with your experience try to get back into hospitality then 👍

Even maybe approach your old employer if you left in good terms. Decent hard working employees are hard to find these days. They might snatch you back!

You sound like someone who’s broken herself out of captivity. Amazing!

If you were a healthy weight until he came along you may find your new life makes getting back there fairly straightforward.

Can you contact old friends to reconnect?