No career at nearly 40

[Plubbler]

I am really struggling mentally due to my total lack of career at 38. Back story to this is I have a SEN child who could not cope with mainstream educational settings but is highly academic and no special schools are a fit for him. Therefore we decided I would home educate him and he is really thriving both personally and academically. I also have a much younger child (under 2) at nursery. My DH is a high earner so we've been lucky enough to manage on one salary. Now my SEN child attends an online school so requires much less to no 1:1 input I really want to find myself a salaried job. Before I had kids I worked in HR and Operations management (I'm CIPD qualified), and over the past 8 years I've done lots of freelance HR and operational support work, so it's not like I've been without work. A lot of that work has dried up now as I've been on mat leave so clients have moved on, and it's not something I really want to carry on with as the hours and money are so uncertain. I've got plenty of references and so on.

I've applied to so many jobs and I'm struggling to even get shortlisted for interview. I am confident that I know how to write a decent job application (I've lead recruitment campaigns myself many a time over the years!). I feel the fact I've been freelance for the past 8 years is seriously hampering me. I can't even seem to get interviews for incredibly basic admin jobs that I'm massively over qualified for.

I have two degrees and I'm just feeling like an absolute waste of space. My friends of the same age are in senior roles in their fields.

Just wanted to vent about how difficult I'm finding it. Paying over £700 a month at the moment to keep my youngest in nursery (we don't get any of the funded hours) which won't be sustainable for long unless I can find work. But nursery places in my area are utterly scarce so I didn't want to rely on being able to find one at short notice.

Firstly, you're not a waste of space. That's important, don't lose sight of it.

How long have you been looking for work? Unless you're looking for seasonal work this can be a tricky time of year at the best of times. On top of which the market is a bit depressed.

Have you tapped into your network or just been responding to adverts? Spoken to recruiters?

You mention really basic admin jobs - these will get loads of applications so employers will take their pick of the ones with an admin background and who they think will stick around. They are more likely to be making the assessment that it would only be a stepping stone for you, rather than it being any judgement on you as a candidate.

What other roles are you applying for? In an ideal scenario, do you have a medium term goal of where you'd like a role to take you?

Lastly, I would be more inclined to use the word squiggly to describe your career and there's nothing wrong with that. Even if you don't like the word squiggly, I think it's unduly harsh to write it off as non-existent.

Thank you for your kind words. I'd say I've been seriously looking and applying for about two months now. I've had one interview and they were very complimentary but preferred a candidate who did not come from a freelance/consultancy background. I feel like employers see you as flaky if you haven't got an employment history they can verify year by year. I can't exactly give them a list of all my clients and exactly what I did for each one and when.

I'd like to step back into a senior HR Advisor type role to then eventually progress to senior Management.

I've been doing HR consultancy work (probat more operational than strategic, but still a fair amount of strategic stuff) for most of the last 8 years bar my maternity leave so I feel I should have the right amount of experience.

Two months isn't very long so don't despair. It's a shame that your first interview ended with that kind of feedback and I can see how it would have left you feeling the way you are, but you may be able to use it to help you. I don't think all employers would see it that way - others would see the benefits, but it might come down to your pitch and your story telling about how you sell it. As well as finding the right organisational match.

How are you setting out your freelance history at the moment? E.g. are you just describing it as a general freelance period or working as a "Consultant" for xyz? Or even something like "Fractional HR adviser" (or whatever a suitable title would be) if you had any chunky or longer term roles at the same time?

There might be ways to make more of your freelance experience or to head off potential concerns in the way you describe it and the points you emphasise. A slightly different marketing spin to ensure that employers get the best measure of your experience and skills.

If you can show that you were consultant for x organisation for y years that would be a way to allay concerns about sticking power for instance. If you had some chunkier roles you could showcase that might help with perceptions of dabbling. And generally I think if you were able to either name some roles or show you had a named consultancy business you were trading through it would also show that you haven't just put "freelance work" to cover up an unemployed gap.

Adding a huge list of clients would likely be counter productive as you say, but finding ways to draw out highlighted specifics may be worth exploring. It's generally easier to tell a compelling story about achievements if it is couched in more specific terms - and people find it easier to picture and relate to.

It might be worth reporting your post and asking MN to move it to the Work board. It might get seen by more people there with more relevant/useful experience than me (and won't fall out of sight as fast as threads do on Chat).