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I've stopped driking and I am about to start 3 weeks of parties.

12 replies

Bookpage · 05/12/2025 11:24

When I say I've stopped, I've cut right back. I don't think I ever had a problem, as such, I'd often go weeks without a drink, but when I did drink, I drank a lot. It became my "personality" the thing people knew about me was I liked a drink/party. It wasnt helped by the fact that following DH's death I was taken under the wing of a group of lovely people, who got me out of the house and kept me busy, but also really like to party.

Anyway, I decided to change it and now haven't had more than two drinks in an evening for months, often none at all. This has had an impact on the things I like to do. Just hanging out at the pub has lost it's appeal and I really don't want to go back to the hangovers.

I have parties every weekend until Chridtmas. All events that I would previously been very much looking forward to.

I have two concerns. One is that friends don't love the fact that I've cut back will either try to twist my arm and/or consider me less fun than I used to be. It's true I won't want to be dancing as much and won't laugh so easily as mediocre jokes! I know people will say they're not good friends but they were very good to me and exactly what I needed at the lowest part of my life - a time when people I'd previously thought of as good friends disappeared.

So, I've enjoyed drinking less by doing quieter things I enjoy. For the next few weeks I need to find a way to be lively without a drink. Any techniques....?

OP posts:
Mollydoggerson · 05/12/2025 11:29

Red bull

Keroppi · 05/12/2025 11:39

Energy drinks and make an effort to dance and have fun and feel loose even when you're more sober! Maybe you were judging yourself and feeling silly for being silly and social without a drink? Have a think and reflect

Of course drink loosens you up but you're definitely capable of having just as good a time without it. The most annoying bit of being sober is trying to listen to drunk people. Lol

For drinks try kombucha, spritzes, singles. Lots of water to pace yourself and enjoy food. Take yourself outside for fresh air and make an effort to have an hour or two of intense FUN flinging yourself around dancing with your mates etc then say goodbye to the least judgey of your friends and don't bother with goodbyes to the others if they're really drunk. Just leave and it'll be grand, no FOMO.

Hfiajfbdoflv · 05/12/2025 12:11

This is a really difficult one. Can you pretend you are drinking, get a tonic without the gin but in a gin glass, so at least you don’t get extra attention for not drinking?

FancyCatSlave · 05/12/2025 12:18

If you are drinking a bit just make drinks last a really long time. Drink something that there is a no alcohol version of then just let people buy you the alcohol version and buy yourself the non. Leave the alcoholic ones largely undrunk on a table etc.

You don’t have to be obvious about it and people will gradually adjust to you being less “fun” if you don’t draw attention.

I did this in the past, I’d have no alcohol lagers in a glass so you couldn’t see the bottle it came from and would let people buy me the odd alcohol one but either leave it, or drink it really, really slowly. People only really notice if you make non drinking a “thing”. Once they are pissed they are oblivious.

gamerchick · 05/12/2025 12:22

Get your own drinks and get 0.0 alcohol stuff.

I can't really tolerate alcohol much now, so I tend to have 1 and move to zero stuff. It's second nature now and nice not to have the hangovers.

gamerchick · 05/12/2025 12:23

Don't go mad on the red bulls. You're not supposed to have more than 2 in a day.

Bookpage · 05/12/2025 12:23

I'm not so much worried about what to drink as how I'm going to produce party me without one.

OP posts:
Bookpage · 05/12/2025 12:24

gamerchick · 05/12/2025 12:23

Don't go mad on the red bulls. You're not supposed to have more than 2 in a day.

I'm not drinking Redbull. I'll feel worse than having a proper drink 🤣

OP posts:
Justmadesourkraut · 05/12/2025 12:29

I'd have your one or two drinks early on to benefit from the relaxing effect of alcohol. If you are drinking a lot less, they may well affect you more - enough to get you on the dance floor and having fun.
Then ease up and move onto non alcoholic drinks, enjoy the food and chat. If you decide you've had enough, it's ok to bail out early, but you may well adjust and find you can still enjoy yourself with your old mates or make new ones, whose jokes really are funny!

CNDflag · 05/12/2025 12:31

You don’t have to do anything. Just drink or don’t drink, if you don’t want to go to something, don’t go.
Honestly does this pressure really still exist these days ? When I have periods of not drinking, no one cares or tries to talk me into having a drink 🤷‍♀️

Bookpage · 05/12/2025 12:35

CNDflag · 05/12/2025 12:31

You don’t have to do anything. Just drink or don’t drink, if you don’t want to go to something, don’t go.
Honestly does this pressure really still exist these days ? When I have periods of not drinking, no one cares or tries to talk me into having a drink 🤷‍♀️

Oh wow, you, your life and the people you know are different to mine. Fancy that 🤣

I enjoy a party, I'm just recognising they're going to be different this year.

OP posts:
LlynTegid · 05/12/2025 12:50

You will feel a sense of achievement if you can go to a party and not drink alcohol, and if you are less interesting to others, that is their issue not yours.

Perhaps claim you are on medication or some other excuse.

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