Torn over choice for primary school

[Givemepickles]

Choosing a school for DS1 and we can't decide between our catchment school and 2 smaller church schools which haven't catchments. DS1 is a very emotional child who is easily overwhelmed and is sensitive but also quite boisterous. He is also very physical and we expect will be sporty. DS2 will also go to the school we choose hopefully and so far seems musical and much better at focusing than DS1. So trying to find a good fit for both.

Option A: catchment school, 2 form entry, 14 min walk, terrible parking, council possibly changing road layout which means driving time will almost double for us but we'd usually walk. The school is modern and well funded but we didn't love the head although we liked the ethos of the school. Loads of clubs and big focus on sport. Lots of local kids walking to school each day. But we just didn't love it, it felt quite clinical.

Option B: church school, 1 form entry, 21 minute walk, easier drive. Not sure on parking. Take part in sports but don't often win but strong in a couple of sports we're keen on. Far fewer clubs but they do have something each day. Great links to local community and the main church in town. Do lots of trips, at least one or two every half term. Good focus on play in year r and 1.

Option C: church school, 8 minute drive, couldn't walk, in the countryside, 1 form entry. I loved this one. Focus on sport and drama. Excellent approach to play throughout KS1. However we feel we wouldn't be so embedded in the town community with this school and friends may be a half hour drive away since its I'm the countryside and people will come to it from all over.

We are likely to get out first choice as our catchment school is the only one oversubscribed. How do we choose?

Definitely not C. You want to have easy access to friends. Are you religious? Would you get in for a church school? I'm also not a fan of one form entries - any big clashes of personalities and there's no wiggle room for them to change form.

None sound a bad option.

I'd go with A though, walking to school and being close to friends (who he'll end up walking with when older) is a great plus

I would also go with A. There are a lot of advantages to a two form entry school. More adults to do the work and more children to get to know.

It’s the closest and it’s not a church school.

Primary aged children like to have play dates after school. That’s much easier if they’re at a local school.

I think a two form entry school offers more flexibility for developing friendships and extra curricular activities.

I wouldn’t choose school 3 because you and he won’t feel part of that community and a longer drive to school always has its own problems.

Unless you really feel C is the right option, I'd rule it out - as others have said not so good from the social point of view. Also, what happens if you're really ill or car breaks down, how would he get to school - if you can walk this is covered by A and B, and if you engage with local Mums you're more likely to come across someone who will step in and help if there really is an issue. Also, if he's boisterous, the times you're not rushing off to work, he can walk.

Also, have you looked at all the schools with him being present? That might help, some will have activity days, others you might only meet the head (nothing wrong with that, but how interested where they in your son in trying to find out what the school could offer him?

b!
one form entry is imo a great plus.
and embedded in the community
perfect

A.

One form entry means that your child will be with the same children throughout primary so limits social development. Also if there are problems socially there are no options to move the children around.

Having access to lots of clubs that all drive his interest in sport will also be really advantageous for helping his confidence.

Being able to walk to school also a bonus. Never underestimate the benefits of being in the catchment school. As someone who has had to travel 25km for school drop off you quickly realise how important it is to be close to the school. You’ll have no end of times to go back to school outside of drop off and pick up.

The fact you don’t like the head is neither here or there. You’re not likely to have that much interaction with him / her. As long as the school is running well / achieving and the children are happy and feel safe I wouldn’t consider this.

Hmm I think if I was so ill I couldn't drive then I definitely couldn't walk half an hour there and back either. I imagine that would be pretty rare, I hope! I do think other local parents would be great, is that something you've found useful?

We haven't taken him round no, some schools said no children and other times he was at nursery. He's also an August baby so only recently turned 3 so not very up for sitting through long presentations and so on. However we did have our toddler with us on tour of Option A and he showed no interest in him which was a shame but I assume he was busy thinking about the tour.

Are clashes of personality a common issue? DH and I both went to small primaries and this never occurred to us as an issue. Neither of us saw that or at least remember it being a problem. Do you mean if someone is bullying my child and they don't have another class to move to?

I didn't feel like an 8 minute drive was long but yes it's hard to know how that will affect friendships. Do you find your DCs go round to friends houses a lot after school? I'd assumed they'd mostly be at the school wrap around clubs. What age do they start playdates?

It's definitely common enough that I wouldn't want to paint myself into a corner if there was a well funded school close by that didn't just have one form.

I would go with A. You can walk, local friends for playdates, 2 form entry is better for friendships as it’s a larger pool and also gives the opportunity to swap classes if an issues arises in the future (hopefully won’t but you never know), lots of clubs suiting a wide variety of interests especially for your second if he’s too young to know what he’ll be into yet and club options also tie into wrap around care which even if you don’t need it now things change, remember you’ll potentially have kids at this school until your youngest is 11. I wouldn’t worry about the fact you didn’t love the head- you’re unlikely to have much interaction with them day to day and you’re highly unlikely to have the same head for the whole time you have a DC at the school anyway.

Option A... for all the reasons others have said.
Also if your ds is 'sensitive but boisterous' you want the option of more children to play with not fewer..I say this as the parent of what was a ball of energy son, and now my grandson (4.. now in reception). Some kids will LOVE him, but the gentler ones may not, and it's best to have a wider pool of children to play with!
( Have to say DGS has made lots of friends, has settled really well but definitely prefers his equally active friends to the quiet ones)
Lots of sports = burn off the energy!

The 2 form one. More funding, more resources and bigger social diversity