How do you “break up” with a friend?

[Sillyquestion123]

I’ll start by saying that I only really have 3 friends IRL. I have plenty “online” but I do like social interaction in person.
Im also autistic so I value friendships where I actually have something in common. I get frustrated with people because they don’t “get me” but because I don’t interact with people on a daily basis ( I WFH) I have kept the ones I have for my own wellbeing.
howevet, one of them causes me more frustration than joy (we have nothing in common) and it’s literally a “it’s me not you” type of situation.
our husbands are also friends and my DH is a lot less particular about who he’s friends with although neither of us have more than 3 friends each (he sometimes gets lonely, whereas I don’t).
I however do think that one day I’ll find someone who I have enough in common and who “gets me” .
anywho, sorry for the rambling, but do I just distance myself? Seems like the easiest thing to do.

What do you like about her? Friends do not have to be an exact clone of yourself for you to have a great relationship. What frustrates you?

Well we have nothing in common (at least of the things that matter to me) so I would never be able to have a meaningful conversation in that sense.

it really frustrates me that she doesn’t really listen to my likes/dislikes - I find it really frustrating to repeat myself.

she’s also very old school, so for example she thinks homosexuality is “made/grown into” and out eldest is gay.

Its difficult if your partners are friends. However if you want to gradually distance yourself from her it should not be too difficult for a working mother to be "busy" with home and work committments. That would still allow the two men to go out for whatever they do together - hobby/pub/whatever. Some people think ghosting in this way is cruel and its better to say how you feel about the friendship. But if you become increasingly "busy" she will gradually find other friends.

Yeah they’re not super close, but they’ve been on weekends abroad and the like and my DH does enjoy them. My DH thinks if we just all socialise together and very every now and then it would work for both of us.

I think the fact she is homophobic is a really strong reason to ditch the friendship. And actually you could say that to her ‘my son is gay and I find your views offensive’