Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Can we please stop spreading the same tired old myths about flu?

154 replies

AutisticAndMore · 03/12/2025 17:46

The ones about not being able to get out of bed if there was a £50 note on the floor and talk of “real flu”.

Flu can be asymptomatic, mild, moderate or severe. It’s still “real flu” regardless of severity.

It’s a tiresome and potentially dangerous myth that it always has to be severe. And no you might not know for definite that you have flu unless you test for it/are tested but you don’t have to be confined to your bed to have flu.

https://www.cedars-sinai.org/newsroom/yahoo-life-why-does-the-flu-make-some-people-sick-but-not-others

Yahoo! Life: Why Does the Flu Make Some People Sick but Not Others?

Yahoo! Life recently interviewed infectious disease specialist Jonathan Grein, MD, director of Hospital Epidemiology at Cedars-Sinai, about why some people seem to be more susceptible to the flu than other people.   Grein told Yahoo! Life the short ans...

https://www.cedars-sinai.org/newsroom/yahoo-life-why-does-the-flu-make-some-people-sick-but-not-others

OP posts:
Original poster
AutisticAndMore · 03/12/2025 22:35

Hairylegs202S · 03/12/2025 22:22

My father used to diagnose himself with a touch of flu a couple of times each winter - only at the weekend though, never on a work day. He'd cure himself with lots of tea, and be better the next day.

I think this is the type of flu that is gently derrided.

I've had awful flu a couple of times, but I get what I think are bad colds every winter - maybe they're actually flu. Does it make a difference what I call it? I do my best to avoid spreading it either way.

I still get the flu vaccine every year, as I think of it as a serious illness. Talking down the potential severity of flu could lead to reduced vaccination rates, with very negative outcomes for those who are more susceptible.

I have not talked down flu thank you very much. I even mentioned that it can kill people and said that I think it’s important to try to stop passing it to vulnerable people if it can be feasibly avoided i.e not making unnecessary visits if you have symptoms that could be a cold but could also be flu. (Although as I and a few others have mentioned colds can be a real problem for some of us including me, but yes have a conversation with your vulnerable loved one). However I don’t believe in lying to people and scaring them witless just so that they get a flu vaccination because the reality is as with covid the severity varies greatly, from asymptomatic to death and everything in between. That does not mean that I think people shouldn’t get their flu vaccination, they should especially because you don’t know how you will react each time but myths are not helpful especially if they mean spreading flu to someone who is ECV.

OP posts:
HangingOver · 03/12/2025 22:41

iSage · 03/12/2025 19:15

Don't know if this is true for everyone but in my experience:

Flu - comes on quickly
Cold - gradually develops over a few days
Flu - always have high temperature
Cold - don't always have high temperature
Flu - lose appetite
Cold - can still eat although often lose sense of smell/taste
Flu - lasts longer but recover suddenly
Cold - can drag on for weeks of still coughing and feeling bunged up

Both colds and flu can make me feel too ill to move, but that phase lasts longer with flu.

That first point is how I've known I had COVID every time I got it, it was the speed. Felt fine in the morning, everything hurting like hell by bedtime.

Crwysmam · 03/12/2025 22:42

I didn’t enjoy having flu so I now have the vaccination every year.

Individual experience of flu or other respiratory infections is very subjective so one persons death bed will be another’s “mild flu”. With mild flu and a stoic disposition you may not even consider it to be flu so, and as a result, not isolate or avoid social interaction.

I get it that it is selfish to expose others, but if you are vulnerable then I think it is your responsibility to avoid infection rather the rest of the population.

At this time of the year we usually refuse to see patients for routine dental check ups if they have obvious colds or coughs. It is in the best interests of all our patients to avoid infection so we don’t have to close down through staff shortages. Obviously we see emergencies but we do have access to robust PPE if necessary. But it’s also important to protect other users. A lot of our very vulnerable patients are sensible and avoid making appointments in flu season.

I got tough on patients when one turned up on Christmas Eve with norovirus and I came down with it on Christmas Day evening. I had to throw out all the food I’d prepared to avoid spreading it to the rest of the family. It was a pretty miserable Christmas that year.

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

General health
justforthis · 03/12/2025 22:46

I take your point OP. No I haven't read the whole thread. From my experience I've had severe flu 3 times. I get vaccinated. If I have cold symptoms I generally stay away from vulnerable people. I imagine it's not practical to be tested to see if you have flu or just a cold every time you feel a bit under the weather so what are people supposed to do? A genuine question, I'm not being trying to be difficult.

Shegotanology · 03/12/2025 22:46

I suppose the only time you know you've got it is when you can't get out of bed. Probably why so many people think it's bad every time.

placemats · 03/12/2025 22:49

AutisticAndMore · 03/12/2025 17:46

The ones about not being able to get out of bed if there was a £50 note on the floor and talk of “real flu”.

Flu can be asymptomatic, mild, moderate or severe. It’s still “real flu” regardless of severity.

It’s a tiresome and potentially dangerous myth that it always has to be severe. And no you might not know for definite that you have flu unless you test for it/are tested but you don’t have to be confined to your bed to have flu.

https://www.cedars-sinai.org/newsroom/yahoo-life-why-does-the-flu-make-some-people-sick-but-not-others

When I had flu at the tender age of 8, I nearly died. I don't even remember those weeks being ill.

All I know is that all our neighbours sent Ribenna and Lucozade, plus sweets. It took months for me, an athletic child, to recover.

Never underestimate the Flu and the consequences.

I get vaccinated every year. I'm now 65.

Hairylegs202S · 03/12/2025 22:55

AutisticAndMore · 03/12/2025 22:35

I have not talked down flu thank you very much. I even mentioned that it can kill people and said that I think it’s important to try to stop passing it to vulnerable people if it can be feasibly avoided i.e not making unnecessary visits if you have symptoms that could be a cold but could also be flu. (Although as I and a few others have mentioned colds can be a real problem for some of us including me, but yes have a conversation with your vulnerable loved one). However I don’t believe in lying to people and scaring them witless just so that they get a flu vaccination because the reality is as with covid the severity varies greatly, from asymptomatic to death and everything in between. That does not mean that I think people shouldn’t get their flu vaccination, they should especially because you don’t know how you will react each time but myths are not helpful especially if they mean spreading flu to someone who is ECV.

Edited
Show quote history

I'm not entirely sure what the point of your post is - don't say you have 'just a cold' as it would be more correct to say that you have 'a cold or possibly a mild flu'.

Is it that we shouldn't mix with vulnerable people in case the cold is in fact the flu? I think we all do that already.

What do you want people to do with the information?

Original poster
AutisticAndMore · 03/12/2025 22:58

justforthis · 03/12/2025 22:46

I take your point OP. No I haven't read the whole thread. From my experience I've had severe flu 3 times. I get vaccinated. If I have cold symptoms I generally stay away from vulnerable people. I imagine it's not practical to be tested to see if you have flu or just a cold every time you feel a bit under the weather so what are people supposed to do? A genuine question, I'm not being trying to be difficult.

I’d suggest reading the thread or at least my responses if you can’t be bothered because I’ve addressed this multiple times. But again no I don’t think that it’s practical to stay off work every time you have mild to moderate symptoms of a cold or flu or to test every day because you can pass it along when asymptomatic and that mostly can’t be helped. But people could keep in mind that those seemingly mild or moderate cold symptoms could actually be flu and do as you do, postpone visits to vulnerable people until you are better or at least talk to them and see what they are comfortable with. Tests are available if you want to test on the day. That’s up to you. If it’s a hospital visit then avoid the visit until you are better, if it’s a non emergency situation and you are ill because you could spread it to more than just the person you are visiting.

And before you say well no one would do that. They would. Because people have fixed views on the severity of colds and the severity of flu, I have known and seen many who will visit a vulnerable person with what appears to be a cold but who wouldn’t dream of it if they knew that their cold might actually be flu.

OP posts:
Iloveagoodnap · 03/12/2025 22:58

That’s interesting. There is so much talk of ‘you would know if you had flu’ that I did think it could only be severe. This year my daughter had the nasal flu spray and my husband had the jab. I had nothing. My daughter’s friend came down with a respiratory type illness and was floored for over a week. We were in contact with her on day 1 of her symptoms and a few days later I felt awful and stayed in bed for the day. The next day I had a lingering cough but was much better and then was fine after that. My daughter got nothing and neither did my husband. So I did wonder if it was the flu and they were protected but as I only really suffered for a day I thought it couldn’t have been. But it seems it could indeed have been.

Fibonacci2 · 03/12/2025 23:00

How about don’t visit vulnerable people if you have a virus, any virus! Your post is nonsensical.

Yes, regardless of symptoms you may spread germs. We mitigate that as best we can. Flu jabs are there for anyone vulnerable. If you have a cold/sick bug stay away from people with low immunity. Why obsess over ‘flu’ in particular when even you say in some cases can be symptomless.

If I feel well should I test for flu before visiting my parents?

placemats · 03/12/2025 23:00

AutisticAndMore · 03/12/2025 22:58

I’d suggest reading the thread or at least my responses if you can’t be bothered because I’ve addressed this multiple times. But again no I don’t think that it’s practical to stay off work every time you have mild to moderate symptoms of a cold or flu or to test every day because you can pass it along when asymptomatic and that mostly can’t be helped. But people could keep in mind that those seemingly mild or moderate cold symptoms could actually be flu and do as you do, postpone visits to vulnerable people until you are better or at least talk to them and see what they are comfortable with. Tests are available if you want to test on the day. That’s up to you. If it’s a hospital visit then avoid the visit until you are better, if it’s a non emergency situation and you are ill because you could spread it to more than just the person you are visiting.

And before you say well no one would do that. They would. Because people have fixed views on the severity of colds and the severity of flu, I have known and seen many who will visit a vulnerable person with what appears to be a cold but who wouldn’t dream of it if they knew that their cold might actually be flu.

Edited
Show quote history

But that £50 note?

Stop conflating cold and flu.

Original poster
AutisticAndMore · 03/12/2025 23:02

Hairylegs202S · 03/12/2025 22:55

I'm not entirely sure what the point of your post is - don't say you have 'just a cold' as it would be more correct to say that you have 'a cold or possibly a mild flu'.

Is it that we shouldn't mix with vulnerable people in case the cold is in fact the flu? I think we all do that already.

What do you want people to do with the information?

Show quote history

No we do not all do that. Plenty don’t avoid vulnerable people when they have what they think is “just” a cold. I’ve seen it many times on MN and IRL.

But even if that isn’t an issue for you I think that the spread of disinformation is not helpful so I’m not sure why so many people are seemingly put out with being presented with facts that dispel a tiresome myth. I find it odd that people are so determined to cling to old wives tales and falsehoods.

OP posts:
BogRollBOGOF · 03/12/2025 23:39

I work in a metaphorical petri dish of disease. My immune system is constantly fending off the full gammult of regular infections. I've had people popping out of the room to vomit and then return looking glazed earlier this week thanks to the government's unrealistic targets. Under OP's logic of any minor illness could be potentially serious to vulnerable people, do I just give up on a varied life just incase I unwittingly pass on something serious. I can't not go to work for every minor twinge, I need to be properly unable to function.

I currently have a scratchy throat for at least the 3rd time this autumn... most probably another minor cold... or is it...
I'm not testing for anything if I'm not actually ill, ill, but then if I am that ill, I'd be staying in bed anyway. The brand of ill makes no difference in treating it with OTC medicines (to the majority who don't need specialist anti-virals)

I did describe DS as having flu a few weeks back due to his aching fevers and being wiped out for a week with a side dose of chesty cough and respiratory symptoms. I fended that one off.
Ironically he then missed his flu vaccination due to being ill.

I've never knowingly had the flu. The one time I thought I had, it turned out to be a different notifiable illness after the gastric symptoms refused to go away after a prolonged period and I ended up seeking medical advice.

WokeMarxistPope · 04/12/2025 08:03

AutisticAndMore · 03/12/2025 23:02

No we do not all do that. Plenty don’t avoid vulnerable people when they have what they think is “just” a cold. I’ve seen it many times on MN and IRL.

But even if that isn’t an issue for you I think that the spread of disinformation is not helpful so I’m not sure why so many people are seemingly put out with being presented with facts that dispel a tiresome myth. I find it odd that people are so determined to cling to old wives tales and falsehoods.

Edited
Show quote history

I agree with you, even if we can’t always make perfect decisions in real life we are more likely to make good decisions if the foundation we are basing them on is accurate rather than inaccurate.

KilliMonjaro · 04/12/2025 08:06

AutisticAndMore · 03/12/2025 18:00

Your experience doesn’t change the facts though. I’m not expecting everyone to magically know this hence the link but it is not helpful to have people repeating the same myths about flu and it can be dangerous.

Show quote history

Dangerously how?

KilliMonjaro · 04/12/2025 08:08

What’s the £50 about?

iSage · 04/12/2025 08:10

HangingOver · 03/12/2025 22:41

That first point is how I've known I had COVID every time I got it, it was the speed. Felt fine in the morning, everything hurting like hell by bedtime.

Show quote history

Yes, same here - I've always tested if I had any Covid symptoms and have had confirmed Covid three times.

Outwiththenorm · 04/12/2025 08:33

To add to the confusion, in the States ‘flu’ only seems used to refer to ‘stomach flu’ - ie if you’re not vomiting/got runs, it’s not flu.

Lougle · 04/12/2025 08:44

AutisticAndMore · 03/12/2025 17:46

The ones about not being able to get out of bed if there was a £50 note on the floor and talk of “real flu”.

Flu can be asymptomatic, mild, moderate or severe. It’s still “real flu” regardless of severity.

It’s a tiresome and potentially dangerous myth that it always has to be severe. And no you might not know for definite that you have flu unless you test for it/are tested but you don’t have to be confined to your bed to have flu.

https://www.cedars-sinai.org/newsroom/yahoo-life-why-does-the-flu-make-some-people-sick-but-not-others

I agree that is inaccurate but I'm struggling to see why it's dangerous. If you have asymptomatic flu, crack on, you don't need to do anything different. If you have mild flu you'll feel like you have a cold. Do what you'd do then. If you have a moderate flu you'll be in bed and you'll know about it. The treatment is the same regardless. If you have a severe flu you might be in hospital and you'd know about it. If you have a very severe flu you'll probably be in ICU, vented or even on ECMO, and then you won't care what put you there - they can't really treat the flu, just the complications of it.

As long as people are getting help for symptoms if they need it, it doesn't matter if they know that have flu. If they are having severe symptoms they should be keeping away from vulnerable people anyway.

OopOop · 04/12/2025 08:46

I don’t think the myths are dangerous, just irritating.

WokeMarxistPope · 04/12/2025 09:26

Lougle · 04/12/2025 08:44

I agree that is inaccurate but I'm struggling to see why it's dangerous. If you have asymptomatic flu, crack on, you don't need to do anything different. If you have mild flu you'll feel like you have a cold. Do what you'd do then. If you have a moderate flu you'll be in bed and you'll know about it. The treatment is the same regardless. If you have a severe flu you might be in hospital and you'd know about it. If you have a very severe flu you'll probably be in ICU, vented or even on ECMO, and then you won't care what put you there - they can't really treat the flu, just the complications of it.

As long as people are getting help for symptoms if they need it, it doesn't matter if they know that have flu. If they are having severe symptoms they should be keeping away from vulnerable people anyway.

Show quote history

The myths cause a lot of people not to get the vaccine because they belive they don’t ever catch flu (there are several people saying this now on a thread about the vaccine). If these people understood that they might be catching flu annually, they might get the vaccine to prevent passing it on to others.

Lougle · 04/12/2025 12:58

WokeMarxistPope · 04/12/2025 09:26

The myths cause a lot of people not to get the vaccine because they belive they don’t ever catch flu (there are several people saying this now on a thread about the vaccine). If these people understood that they might be catching flu annually, they might get the vaccine to prevent passing it on to others.

Show quote history

The myths relate to how ill they get when they get flu. Most people are not persuaded to get an injection because it will help other people. It's sad but it's a fact. So many parents refuse to vaccinate their children because the main benefit is protection for the older people and vulnerable groups, and that's just a sniff of a syringe for most children.

Only around 50% of eligible children actually take the vaccines. It will be even worse if the message is 'actually you probably won't get ill anyway, but Mabel will be grateful if you take one for the team.'

https://www.gov.uk/government/statistics/seasonal-influenza-vaccine-uptake-in-children-of-school-age-winter-season-2023-to-2024/seasonal-influenza-vaccine-uptake-in-children-of-school-age-in-england-winter-season-2023-to-2024

Seasonal influenza vaccine uptake in children of school age in England: winter season 2023 to 2024

https://www.gov.uk/government/statistics/seasonal-influenza-vaccine-uptake-in-children-of-school-age-winter-season-2023-to-2024/seasonal-influenza-vaccine-uptake-in-children-of-school-age-in-england-winter-season-2023-to-2024

SparkleSpriteDust · 04/12/2025 13:40

I think this is common knowledge. If your immune system meets a virus but consists of the right 'soldiers' then you may not display symptoms. If you have not 'met' a particular virus (or variant) before then you may become unwell.

OopOop · 04/12/2025 14:18

SparkleSpriteDust · 04/12/2025 13:40

I think this is common knowledge. If your immune system meets a virus but consists of the right 'soldiers' then you may not display symptoms. If you have not 'met' a particular virus (or variant) before then you may become unwell.

Well I’d agree that it should be common knowledge, but I’ve lost count of the number of posters on here who have said ‘if you can get out of bed it’s not the flu’ or a variant thereof. There seems to be little understanding that you can have mild flu, just like there are differing severities of most viruses. One of my children was completely floored by chicken pox, one just had a spots. I’m not sure why some people don’t think the same principle applies to the influenza virus.

StickyToffeePavlovas · 05/12/2025 03:24

Hmm not sure about this as a doctor once told me 'people think they have flu but it's often just a cold, with flu you can't get out of bed' so if medical experts are saying it surely there's some truth to it?