Can we talk about ducks in a row?

[Pottersciderbar82]

It’s clear I’m being “quietly fired”.

Spanner in my works, there are No jobs, I’m looking like it’s a part time job, there is nothing.

As my job has always been unstable, people are let go a lot, I began to squirrel away money to cover bills should it happen to me.

Ive enough to cover a year if im very very frugal.

I have around 5 years of working left in me at my age. Pension is there but not great for when needed.

But I need to work. My confidence due to the whole shit show of quiet firing, is very very low, I’m suffering while trying to manage a situation out of my hands. Obviously need to think & plan with clarity.

What else do I need to do?

So how many hours does he work?

40 hours a week. No opportunity for extra hours either.

So yes op - all you can do is as you listed or co sided self employed if a possibility

good luck

Supermarket jobs if you have many in your family. seem good value if you also get staff discount.

Lean in, really go for it at work but reach out to your network and meet up with ex colleagues

What level of income do you need to maintain as you are? Over £100k? Over £50k?

Do you have a mortgage or are you renting? If you have equity, could you move to somewhere which is nice, still near enough a city for work but lower house prices.

Also - many pensions you can take 25% tax free from 55. I have pension which allows me to take it before 60 but theres x% penalty.

Can you set up your own consultancy? Training people to do what you do now?

Could your husband get a job earning more if you took more household responsibilities?

Could you rent out a spare bedroom to a lodger? (up to £7.5k tax free)

Have you got your savings earning max income?

What benefits would be able to claim (eg Child benefit 1.3k per year)

Great tips melli. Thank you.
£40k will cover bills, less than 2 years left on the mortgage, monthly payments very low, it’s gas& electric, council tax that are crippling.
No room to rent a room.

Husband has applied for many higher paying jobs, got nowhere, it really knocked his confidence.
Doesn’t want to give up kids routines and not be available for kids activities,
I’d happily take over but he loves it. He didn’t have anything like it as a child and has always been determined to show up for his kids.

Do you have more than one 13 yr old?

One older, self sufficient still at home.

Well if he’s working 40 hours a week, he can’t be attending that much by way of kids activities for his 13 yr old!

So if him getting a higher pay role is not on the cards. Then your options are head down and plough on with work. or job hunt relentlessly. Or go self employed if possible. There’s no magic solution.

Football 3 nights a week, gym 2 nights a week, football games at weekends and another fair weather hobby in spring/summer on top of working 40 hours a week. He also does school drop off and pick ups.
He’s a bloody trooper!

And your work means you miss all of this?

what salary are you on?

Yes, I work long hours and travel a lot, away for days at a time.
I’ve always worked crazy hours.

When the kids were little I did the long hours and the childcare, household stuff but when COVID hit, I was pulling 50-60 hour weeks so our roles reversed as dh was wfh through out, I went out of the house to my job.

I’ve worked my arse off to get to where I am. I provide a really nice life for us, overcome so much.
I’m not at all arsed about the status.. if there is any, it’s paying the bills, not interested in luxury, not at all interested in stuff, belongings, car or holidays. None of it, just to have purpose and not worry about doing a weekly food shop.

If it all did end tomorrow, my whole focus would be less, less time out of the house, less pressure to progress, more time st home with my lot.

I am just gutted that it has come to such a cut throat and ruthless end.

What about extending the mortgage to get the payments down? Is that possible? It would buy you time while you look for something. And have you checked out any benefits you might be entitled to? It’s not something I know about, sorry.

So is your position very high paying?

If redundancy hasn’t been mentioned.
and you haven’t been put on any performance to indicate that sacking on the horizon

I am struggling to see what the issue is? You think that they maybe pushing you to quit… what makes you say that? And surely just, don’t quit?

Apply for benefits on the first day of unemployment, not when your savings have run out. It means NI contributions are paid, even if you're not receiving the payments.
Get any job (shelf stacking etc) rather than hold out for THE job.
Do a budget overhaul
Look at ways to live a simpler life.
Ask non dependent DC to make a contribution to the household outgoings.

Update your LinkedIn profile and send a message to all your friends and former colleagues to let them know you're looking for work (and what you're looking for). It can feel a bit awkward, but it's a totally normal thing to do and people are usually keen to help connect you.

So there are lots of “paper cut” type things happening, lots of very clear indicators that I am being quietly fired.

It’s definitely happening. I won’t be quitting but need to preserve my sanity as it is extremely psychologically damaging and stressful.
Planning and being prepared in the mean time, not sitting on my hands and being washed away with the toxic flow is my strategy here.

If this hasn’t happened to you, believe me, you know it is happening.

The fantastic tips here are helping me think clearly, not with a wounded “victim “ mentality but with a focused plan.

lots of very clear indicators that I am being quietly fired.

Well push back
Prove them wrong
Go in, head down, work hard, do your job.

If you aren’t happy in your job, then really the only thing to do is to relentlessly job hunt

no such thing as being “quietly fired” unless you cave in

Is definitely 60 for you Public Sector pension?

Maybe I'm in a different Public Sector area but we can currently take ours at 57, obviously drastically reduces what you get but I'm hoping it will cover expenses between 57 and 67 plus working part-time.

Keep a note of every example of moves to "manage you out". And give ACAS a quick call - constructive dismissal is grounds for legal action & compensation.

Does your older child pay board? If not, they should start.

Does your workplace have an EAP? If so I would make use of it to help manage your emotions. You need someone to talk to. Some of them offer career counselling too.

best wishes. It’s a horrible place to be in

I’d also say - if you have items that you had always planned to sell but haven’t got round to, start now. Put the extra on your mortgage

Review your finances, bank accounts, insurance, phone plans etc to make sure you have the best deals

Would some sort of training or mentoring as a side hustle work for you? Sounds like you have a lot of experience.
And yes, keep detailed notes of everything, of conversations and feedback, specifically things that you have been asked to do , including specified processes, outcomes and deadlines. Clarify these in writing.
Get copies of everything you might need if you are randomly asked to leave - I was once made redundant and my email access was cut off before I’d actually left. Email everything to your home email now.