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WTF

6 replies

Blueberry1980 · 16/11/2025 10:14

Struggling with the mentality of people. Long story short - one child, 15, abusive ex, left when dd was 2, he’s not seen her. Formed good friendship with his mum. He was abusive to her too. I’ve been picking up the pieces of everything he has done to his whole family for years. About a year ago his mum started acting weird, caught her lying lots. DD wanted to see her father to get things off her chest, I agreed we could try to arrange but in a controlled way where she is safe and I a nearby.
october my dad passed away, he lived in Spain so I had to go to sort out his affairs and also funeral etc. dd was with her gran, his mum. Driving to the funeral my daughter calls me hysterically crying, her gran had got her father round and demanded she talk to him, she didn’t want to and was scared and crying, he was laughing at her. Her gran swore at her, told her to F off, that she hated her, slated me & told my daughter if she died she doesn’t want her at her funeral. I was lucky enough to have someone nearby to go get my daughter. Dd has been waiting for an apology but doesn’t seem this women who’s been a huge part of our lives for years is sorry at all. Wtaf! I don’t want anything g to do with her again, wouldn’t you guys do the sane?

OP posts:
FuzzyWolf · 16/11/2025 10:18

It sounds a mess. I can’t imagine your DD wants anything to do with her again and neither of you have to if that’s your wishes.

RandomMess · 16/11/2025 10:19

How old is ex’s Mum could she have developed dementia?

UpDoLego · 16/11/2025 10:31

I’d be actively encourage no contact at this point, unless you’d be happy with a very heartfelt reasoned apology. Even then only supervised contact after that.

Blueberry1980 · 16/11/2025 10:31

She’s 70, I doubt dementia. More gullible and a bit 2 faced. He has been creeping back into her life ever since he found out his great gran is in her last days (she’s got a ton of money and properties) I can see it a mile off. His mum, who I’ve been supporting for years has already been robbed of 70k by her other kid who’s disgusting too. After what she’s done to my daughter I don’t want to rescue her this time

OP posts:
TeenLifeMum · 16/11/2025 10:33

Her son will always be her priority.

IvedoneitagainhaventI · 16/11/2025 11:05

Even if she apologised to your DD it would be meaningless. Because you will never be able to trust her now. She has shown where her allegiance lies: to her son.
Going no contact is the only way forward.

I'm really sorry your DD experienced that behaviour fom someone she had every reason to trust. It must have been really upsetting and frightening for her.

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