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Original poster

Would love to know your response to this!

47 replies

jumpingthehighjump · 14/11/2025 20:23

Bit gobsmacked really! Is this 2025 or 1960?

I will try to keep this brief!

Bought a ring at an auction, love it. Emerald and diamonds, got it at a really good price when I bid for it. (Not a lot, about £250, I was lucky, worth more)

Anyway, it's an emerald centre stone with little tiny diamonds round the edge.

On holiday recently I realised I'd lost a tiny diamond from it, and it really showed so took it to a well recommended jeweller near where I live. Husband and wife team, they've been there for 30 years, great reputation.

To repair it would need complete resetting, as he has to remove the central stone, and repair the claw sets of the whole thing. Cost far more than I would've thought but had asked elsewhere too, and this guy is good.

So to rebuild the ring, it was £350, but I know I got a bargain so decided to go for it.

The wife took the ring to the counter and said...

"Would you like to go home and ask hubby if it's OK to go ahead?"

I was not rude but said very firmly. "No. It's my ring, it's my money"

The woman behind me sniggered, she got it.

I'm amazed this sort of thing exists in this day and age. I'm old, but haven't been confronted with this for quite a while...

OP posts:
Original poster
jumpingthehighjump · 15/11/2025 12:11

Crinkle77 · 15/11/2025 11:59

Ah right sorry OP sorry I misunderstood.

No worries Crinkle 😊

OP posts:
katseyes7 · 15/11/2025 12:11

I've had this sort of thing before.
I said "Yes, of course. I'll need to contact a medium first, though."
And that was the end of it.

EverythingElseIsTaken · 15/11/2025 12:21

Sexism is alive and well! When we bought a previous car the salesman said “right I’ll go and fetch the paperwork” showed DH to a seat at a desk and showed me to a different area with magazines and tea / coffee so I toddled off and sat down with a drink and a glossy magazine. Bloke went through the paperwork with DH which was fair enough as he is the registered keeper of the car but then when it came to arranging the bank transfer they hit a problem….. I was the one with the money! Suddenly the salesman was interested in me again!

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Clothing
Original poster
jumpingthehighjump · 15/11/2025 12:46

BruisedNeckMeat · 15/11/2025 12:03

Definitely rather old fashioned! If I’m being charitable though, considering it was quite an expensive repair, perhaps she was giving you an opportunity to leave without embarrassment??

You are very charitable! As the repair was expensive, it would have been easy to leave saying "I'll think about it" without embarrassment
😊

OP posts:
Original poster
jumpingthehighjump · 15/11/2025 12:50

Maybe I'm far too attuned to this sort of thing... dunno.

I booked some flights with Iberia Airlines for me and DH. I was the lead passenger, I paid for them, my email address (with a recognisable feminine name!)

Yet when the confirmation came through it was addressed to Mr.Jumping. Not me.
I did complain at that one.

I think we have to speak out!

OP posts:
ShinyWorthKeeping · 15/11/2025 12:51

My aunt and her husband own a jewelers and this is exactly the sexist BS they would spout...wonder if it's them!

Original poster
jumpingthehighjump · 15/11/2025 13:01

ShinyWorthKeeping · 15/11/2025 12:51

My aunt and her husband own a jewelers and this is exactly the sexist BS they would spout...wonder if it's them!

Haha... I wonder! Place the jewellers is, begins with C !

OP posts:
fishtank12345 · 15/11/2025 13:05

jumpingthehighjump · 14/11/2025 20:23

Bit gobsmacked really! Is this 2025 or 1960?

I will try to keep this brief!

Bought a ring at an auction, love it. Emerald and diamonds, got it at a really good price when I bid for it. (Not a lot, about £250, I was lucky, worth more)

Anyway, it's an emerald centre stone with little tiny diamonds round the edge.

On holiday recently I realised I'd lost a tiny diamond from it, and it really showed so took it to a well recommended jeweller near where I live. Husband and wife team, they've been there for 30 years, great reputation.

To repair it would need complete resetting, as he has to remove the central stone, and repair the claw sets of the whole thing. Cost far more than I would've thought but had asked elsewhere too, and this guy is good.

So to rebuild the ring, it was £350, but I know I got a bargain so decided to go for it.

The wife took the ring to the counter and said...

"Would you like to go home and ask hubby if it's OK to go ahead?"

I was not rude but said very firmly. "No. It's my ring, it's my money"

The woman behind me sniggered, she got it.

I'm amazed this sort of thing exists in this day and age. I'm old, but haven't been confronted with this for quite a while...

Maybe she gets that a lot? I need to ask hubby, maybe people say that to her to politely decline as an excuse or really do need/ want to ask.. I would have just probably said "no its ok, thanks" and paid.

NebulousSadTimes · 15/11/2025 13:05

I went to the paint shop and was asked "What's he after?". I said "Who?". There was a bit of a pause before he asked me what I would like.

I'd have probably asked jewellery shop woman what it had to do with my husband, ever so politely.

LittleGreenDuck · 15/11/2025 13:07

isitmytime · 15/11/2025 10:01

I was on the hunt for a new car and went to a show room with my now EXH the car was for me, only me, being paid for solely by me. Found one I liked and was asking the salesman for more details. Every answer was directed to EXH the salesman went over the specifications to EXH (who in fairness kept saying tell her, she’s buying it) I walked out, without saying another word, after he told EXH all about the cars performance and then opened the back door and told me it had rear speakers.

when I bought this house after divorce a carpet company asked if my “other half” would come in to sign the purchase agreement…I hadn’t mentioned any “other half” because I didn’t have one! They didn’t get my business either.

Had very similar buying a new car. I was helpfully told that there was plenty of space in the boot for shopping and it was "nice and easy to park". 🙄

Vaninees · 15/11/2025 13:09

It’s a bit tough, it suggests she assessed you as not very well off and old fashioned lifestyle. Eek!

Largelemontrees · 15/11/2025 13:11

I wonder if she thought it was an engagement ring and therefore that your partner/husband should be paying for it.

Karatema · 15/11/2025 13:13

Love that ring. Reminds me of my aunt’s which I never wear because I bought it for her - her birthstone.

TroysMammy · 15/11/2025 13:27

DarkRootsBlue · 15/11/2025 09:41

I had a heating engineer come round and he commented that an outlet pipe needed some cement around it. He followed that with ‘Do you have a husband? A son?’. I found it really awkward, I have neither and felt judged. I was embarrassed so weakly just said ‘No’ and he apologised. Which made it worse!

It caught me off guard. I’ve lived alone for 20 years and am more than capable of a bit of minor DIY.

The response to do you have a husband should have been "Why, are you asking me out on a date"? and watch him squirm.

Iwasneverafan · 15/11/2025 13:36

lemonraspberry · 14/11/2025 20:54

It happens. I was after new windows for my house which I was paying for. Whilst on the phone arranging for someone to come round & quote they asked if I had a partner/husband. When I said I had a partner they insisted he would have to be there as well, with the salesman, to help make the decisions on type of windows etc.

needless to say I went elsewhere for a quote.

Exact same happened to me with windows- my house, my windows and they wanted my partner there!! WTAF!

Original poster
jumpingthehighjump · 15/11/2025 13:43

Vaninees · 15/11/2025 13:09

It’s a bit tough, it suggests she assessed you as not very well off and old fashioned lifestyle. Eek!

I flippin' hope not!!

To add, she was probably a similar age to me!

OP posts:
Original poster
jumpingthehighjump · 15/11/2025 13:44

Largelemontrees · 15/11/2025 13:11

I wonder if she thought it was an engagement ring and therefore that your partner/husband should be paying for it.

Doubtful. I have stacked rings on my wedding/engagement finger. And I took the ring off, from my right hand when I gave it to her.

OP posts:
Odiebay · 15/11/2025 13:48

I had this with a fishmonger at the door. I said no thanks we don't really eat fish and he said "do you want me to wait whilst you ask the decision maker of the house". I said " well your looking at her" 🤣

YarraValley · 15/11/2025 13:48

I once went to a hairdresser who when I asked for a couple of inches off, asked me if I wanted to call my husband first!

Wishimaywishimight · 15/11/2025 13:57

I have never encountered this! It's so blatantly ridiculous I would just laugh and say "don't be daft".

ShinyWorthKeeping · 15/11/2025 14:43

jumpingthehighjump · 15/11/2025 13:01

Haha... I wonder! Place the jewellers is, begins with C !

Show quote history

Not my aunt then, which unfortunately means there's more of these people in the world!

notatinydancer · 15/11/2025 21:54

CalmShaker · 14/11/2025 20:39

I think with it being a ring she probably thought your husband would pay, not to be belittling but just as a 'he should pay' thing.
What did your husband say?

Edited

Are you the jeweller ? What a strange assumption that she even has a husband?

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