Non screen based hobby idea for ADHD 10 year old boy?

[Boyyyy]

DS (10) has adhd is absolutely obsessed with screens (tv and video games). I limit his access to them because it wouldn’t be healthy for him to use them as much as he’d like to! But he has no hobbies, all he does is talk about screen time (video games). He will still play with toys, but almost reluctantly and whines a lot about wanting to be on a screen.

I have adhd (genetics!) and loved my hobbies and still do. None of them were screen-based. So I’d like to help him find an activity one evening a week that he’ll hopefully love.

Any ideas? I’m going to give him a list of things to help inspire him. So far I’ve got the basics: drama, learning an instrument, gymnastics (he doesn’t stop moving), a racquet sport.

He already does football with friends on Saturday afternoons, so that doesn’t need to be on the list! He quite likes it but doesn’t want more of it and often complains about going.

Please give me some suggestions!

Climbing tends to be popular with ND kids.

Also D and D if he likes making up worlds

My 10 year old suspected ADHD son likes piano lessons, athletics club (variety of hurdles, relay, sprinting, jumping and throwing), football, bike riding and cricket but also likes 'fiddly' things like rubix cubes, origami and learning card tricks.

I have 2 DSes with ADHD and am pleased to see their hobbies listed by so many people! A nice feeling of belonging.

Between them mine do
Gymnastics, trampolining, climbing, tennis, judo, table tennis, sailing and cycling. Oh and a new hobby since we moved to a new town by the beach: cliff jumping. My 11 year old adores somersaulting off the local cliff.

One adores reading and hyperfocuses on that. The other is hard to get into reading.

They are basically on the move all the time unless on the screens (which I strongly limit). We've actually overhauled our lives in order to live somewhere that's more suited to them. We moved from an inner city flat to a large house with a garden near a beach. They can run and climb and be noisy to their heart's content and there are no neighbours to annoy!

No swimming required in a Sailability club. No member should be going in the water, the boats are designed for stability. Can be sailed by wheelchair users, kids with ASD, sight impaired etc. Also, nit very expensive and run by volunteers who can sail.

And Lego. A shop full of Lego in our house.

That’s such a valid point.

Loads of ND kids in Scouts!

Squash! Fast, loud, busy and adrenaline-pumped. My ADHD DC, now 13, is obsessed.

Find some old or broken tech (cd or dvd players etc or buy from charity shop) and let him loose with a screwdriver. Hours of fun taking it apart and putting back together!

I truly do believe screens ruin my son’s day. He is obsessed with them and begs for them constantly! We have to hide the tv remote etc. It makes me imagine him as a heroin addict! I wish we had a house with no tv and no tablet and no video games, to be honest - but that ship has very much sailed. (Although we don’t actually have a tablet!)

I LOVE these suggestions! I’ve got a nice long list now! I am going to put it to him this weekend and help him choose something. My guess is he’ll say climbing or trampolining!

I think you’re right and hadn’t thought of it this way! When he’s involved in reading or Lego, he’s really involved.

I advise checking availability before giving him choices... I currently drive 20 miles (40 mins minimum, often more with traffic, I can 30 mins to get tonthe main roads sometimes on the way home) for climbing for DD. Its totally worth it, but we didn't realise exactly how much of an impact it would have.

Drumming is great for ADHD
Also climbing

I don't believe screen based hobbies are therapeutic - they are definitely addictive.
We have a "choose an activity out of three" policy - DS (13) has diagnosed ADHD and DD (11) is waiting for assessment.
DS does riding (very low level), guitar (again very much a beginner), swims as a fun activity rather than lessons, goes to a church youth group (it's an hour of play and half an hour chat - we don't stay for all the chat) and is loosely attached to DD Scout group. DD does flute, cycling training, swimming lessons, a different church youth group.
We follow advice from ADHD Dude (start with YouTube channel and the ADHD Guys podcast.)

We recently took them both to a PGL family holiday and we agree that climbing is great!

Also I agree re simple hobbies at home - both DCs draw and DS makes elaborate Lego models of, mainly, TV characters, DD does other crafty things.

have you tried taking him to a session at the Warhammer shop?

Have you considered horse riding?

Climbing/bouldering is very good for ADHD apparently because it combines mental and physical exercise.

My DS liked a local Parkour club at that age. You sometimes find things like "ninja warrior" clubs too.

Agree with looking at martial arts and drumming as well - these used to be the classic hobbies for hyperactive kids as can help them channel their energy.

And agree don't completely demonise the screen, although I do agree they can be addictive and limiting time can help a lot - DS1 only became less obsessed with the screen stuff when we cut it right down. But in addition to limiting time - join him in this - see what he is actually doing. Roblox IME is disastrous, as is youtube/tiktok. (Youtube is tricky - because there are some great things on there, but also a LOT of brain rot type content).

But there are plenty of games which are positive and can teach all kinds of skills. He is probably in the "dark years" for minecraft where it seems too babyish and hasn't quite had a comeback yet Be careful if he is playing a lot of free games. Some of these can be designed to be highly stimulating and addictive, or steer you heavily towards paid for content. It can be better to look at the themes or types of games he likes, and then search (e.g. on reddit) for some better quality alternatives which aren't so crammed with adverts and in-game purchases. And try playing games with him. It can be great fun and a bonding experience. Figure out how long you want to do it for and set a timer in advance so there isn't a huge battle when it's time to stop.

Is he interested in coding at all? There are tons of brilliant coding apps and programs he can learn, or look into how to make mods/content for games he is interested in.

If he likes watching people play games on youtube, you could also let him try making his own videos although I would be cautious about letting him release video content to the public because of potential privacy issues. But they could be shared privately with friends/family, or if you're inclined to, you could moderate the channel for him and screen everything he puts out to avoid things like him accidentally mentioning his location/school/name etc and everything that comes back in (comments, etc). But this teaches all kinds of things - presentation skills, video editing, etc and can be really valuable transferable skills.

My son is older, 14, but similar with screens. He has a daily limit of 1 hour but it overtakes his thoughts & he gets upset when he had has to come off, even with warning. His behaviour after screens is often markedly worse.

Other things he enjoys are:

At home - Lego, Gravitrax, making rolletcoasters out of Brio, junk modelling (he raids the cardboard recycling), making board games for us all to play.

Out of the house: Explorers (older Scouts), SEN choir, watching his brother play football & keeping score. Playgrounds especially zipwires. Basketball. Roller coasters & water slides.

He is a thrill seeker & loves the adrenaline rush, but we have to be careful as he also has epilepsy (& autism) so some things could be dangerous if he has a seizure 😏

Completely agree with the commentary about considering why and how screen-based activities are "therapeutic" and looking to recreate aspects of that.

We are a screen heavy family anyway. We will never be 100% screen free and that's one reason why I try to embrace the positive aspects of them. But I think the blind insistence that screens "help kids self-regulate" is simplistic and may not be correct in all cases. Being quiet and still is not necessarily "regulated", and for my middle DS who is now 7, he has poor interoception (awareness of his body needs - hunger, temperature, need to move, toilet etc) anyway, and the screen is so all-encompassing that it tends to eclipse this even more. So he will go even further past being hungry/needing a wee etc and this has the potential to put him into an extremely dysregulated state it's very difficult to get him out of.

Sometimes we use screens as a tool or bribe to e.g. separate children who are antsy and prone to fighting because they are both tired and hungry and food will be ready soon but not immediately. And sometimes we use it as a carrot to encourage certain behaviours or practice of skills. Sometimes it can be a soothing, predictable, familiar thing where they can feel competent which can be restorative after a day of having their self-esteem battered at school for example, so I do see the self-regulation benefits with it there. And also it's fine to just zone out in front of mindless TV sometimes. We all do that, and it's fine for children to do that too, but wanting to do it all of the time is probably a sign that somewhere the balance isn't quite right - either there's too much access to addictive content or they are incredibly overstressed by other aspects of their life or possibly both.

I do notice with all of my DC (I have 3) when I get too relaxed about screen time it is very quick that they gravitate towards that and nothing else and then when it's the norm that screen time is much more restricted, there is far less of a barrier to them choosing other activities. They just automatically do that, and seem to get much of the same quiet, regenerating relaxation type benefits from it.

Definitely a line between pacifying and regulating when it comes to screens.

tbh imo i would build off that wth some sort of course in java or python so his screen time becomes productive. if he is glued to it tho wth no interest in actually building smth up then ye thats a problem. key thing tho is that you should never force anything onto a child that will make them hate said activity. instead you should coerce them into an activity slowly. then again im a random yr 9 on mums net who literally has a PC set up worth £1.7k so idk if you would wanna take my advice

have you ever played minecraft?

Chess Club. You could learn at the same time (assuming you don't already play) and then you could have a real chess board at home and maybe entice him away from screens for an hour of chess.