Am I out of step on lunchbox contents?

[Rainallnight]

DD is 9, and has switched to packed lunches at school recently. She didn’t like school lunches and I don’t mind doing a packed one.

Now she sits with all the other packed lunch kids and is lobbying for what I see as crap, because that’s what the other kids have. The big ones are Pepperamis, mini cheddars, and chocolate covered fruit.

I think Pepperamis are horrendously processed crap, and mini cheddars not great either.

My DC do get treats but I’d never have thought of putting stuff like this in their lunchbox every single day.

But am I out of step? What are you all doing?

Full disclosure - DD is very sedentary and is a bit overweight. She tends towards over eating as a sensory thing (she’s on a waitlist for an ASD/ADHD assessment) so I guess I am a bit cautious.

These other kids are like rakes!

My kids eat a lot of treats, they have biscuits etc. They have packed lunches a couple of times a week and I use them to get some goodness in.

They'll have a sandwich, either decent ham or smoked salmon or cheddar
Veg sticks
Fage Greek yoghurt
Fruit
Some kind of oat bar.

I don’t think you should worry about what others have. Just do what you think is best for your child, people are very different and have different circumstances.

My kids were skinny as rakes and so I didn’t control too much.

but we were veggie so no pepperami. Choc cover fruit sounds a major hassle. Mini cheeses fine.

My daughter usually has a sandwich, crisps, a cake bar , fruit, and a smoothie. She is very thin so i don't usually worry about what i give her to eat as long as it is balanced.

Mine are 8 and 12 and have packed lunches. They have:
Sandwich (usually ham)
cucumber & carrot sticks
mini sausage roll
some sort of chicken satay skewers or similar or a couple of slices of salami
Fruit (selection of grapes, kiwi, melon, pineapple, plums, blueberries etc, whatever’s in season chopped up like a fruit salad)
small treat such as a pack of mini cookies, Rocky bar (usually under 100cal)

So mainly crap but some healthy stuff in there. They eat it so I’m happy and it’s better than some of the lunches their friends bring in.

Younger dd also likes taking cheesy pasta with peas in a thermos pot and then will still have the fruit and veg and sweet treat with that.

I think in an otherwise balanced packed lunch (like a healthy filling on some good quality bread), some chicken, celery and hummus, fruit, etc, a bag of mini cheddars or whatever is fine 🤷 junk is everywhere, it's important we learn to eat it in moderation. A snack items a day won't harm you.

Don’t put that in lunch boxes, if other parents want to then fine but you are right it is processed crap

Our school has a strict lunch policy so items like chocolate, crisps etc are a no go.
A typical packed lunch for us is similar to what they had today; a ham sandwich, green beans, raspberries, strawberries, grapes, rice cake and yoghurt.
Lunches are always on the healthier side as my kids like to try have a competition between each other to see how many of their five a day they can eat each day (how lucky am I that they find this fun 🤣). So the more I put in at lunch the more relaxed I can be for dinners if we have a busy night etc.

We do:
Carb element - sandwich, pinwheels, filled bagel, pesto pasta etc
Meat element - fridge raiders, peppami, left over roast meat (DS loves left over roast pork!)
Fruit / veg element - cucumber, grapes, apple, strawberries etc
Crisps or mini cheddars the odd occasion some pringles if they are left over from the weekend.
Then sweet element - cake, choc bar, cookie, treat bag etc.

DS has one of the healthier lunch boxes from what he comes home and asks for. School have to constantly ask not to send treats for their snack (DS has his fruit/veg then). I think as long as it balanced its fine and its important for my DS to understand everything in moderation.

DS is extremely limited in what he’ll eat so we generally do sandwich + something like Pom bears or hula hoops + raisins + biscuit. It used to be a flapjack-type bar but they’re not allowed. No chocolate/sweets per the school’s policy and they have fruit available to them in school.

Cheese strings... that's all DS wanted in his lunch box and I refused to put them in except in extreme situations as a HUGE treat! And yes, the irony was never lost on me that the super skinny kids were almost always the ones with cookies, biscuits, cheese strings vs my kid who ate fresh, homecooked food etc whose weight was often a problem (also ADHD) etc. Sigh.

Lots of lunchboxes do include these things as they are a) easy b) will be eaten and c) get at least some protein etc into them.

I'd stick to the healthier options you're going with but consider the odd treat int he form of what her friends are having, or some other treat that you consider acceptable. Those lunch box dunker things were a good compromise I felt and he loved the whole ritual of opening them. So he'd get one of those every week or two as a treat! Ditto to pepperami or cheese strings. Although I didn't actually mind the pepperami that much - I did sometimes give other forms that are probably a bit better like decent quality chorizo or, if we'd been to the South African shop, biltong/droewors. Ditto, I refuse to add crisps to lunch boxes but will occassionally put some in on a Friday.

Could you give her a couple of those little saucisson things you get in small bags. It's like pepperami but less crappy? Or give her salami or chorizo in her sandwich sometimes?

As for cheddars, they're not really worse than any other crisps type thing. So maybe once a week. Or give her something like home made popcorn seasoned with parmesan if she likes cheesy things?

As long as she has fruit and a couple of veg in there each day then one less healthy snack a couple times a week is fine I think.

No you're fine, stick to your guns. My daughter used to come home asking why she couldn't have the pringles and chocolate other kids have. I told her why not and eventually she accepted it (my reasoning - the school had asked parents not to send chocolate etc and we were choosing to abide by that - and that the food she was taking was nice enough even if it wasn't fulla sweet or crisps). Occasionally we will slip something nice in, if it's her birthday or something. She normally has either sandwiches or a flask with hot food (soup or pasta mainly), fruit, yogurt, sugar free jelly, crackers etc.

However due to after-school activities she sometimes takes in two snacks - sometimes one of them is a packet of crisps or mini cheddars with a piece of fruit. So I think as with everything it's often about balance.

I don't allow crap of any kind in lunchboxes. Stick to your guns. If the other kids get it, 'that's nice dear' is a good response.

Our packed lunches tend to be:
Carton of juice
Sandwich or wrap
Crisps
Fruit or veg (carrot/ cucumber sticks)

Sometimes I’ll put in an extra snack. But if we were having a sandwich at home, it would just be that and crisps for all of us. So I think it’s enough with extra fruit or veg, plus always put fruit in bag for morning snacks (other snacks not allowed!)

Does she like pepperoni and mini cheddars? Presumably she’s eaten them to know she wants them or is it just lunch box envy?

If you’ve let her have them elsewhere, I’d pop something like that in her lunchbox every now and again as a treat. I do usually include crisps or popcorn in my kids lunchbox, and there’s a sweet treat in there too. I have a biscuit with my mid morning coffee, I’m not going to be too precious about my child having a Kit Kat in their lunch.