Always validate their feelings and never tell them to “man up.” I’m sure you don’t, btw!
The suicide rate in young men is very high, we need to ensure that we raise a generation of men who are “allowed” to have negative feelings and be able to talk about them.
Have lots of fun with them, laugh with them, do daft stuff. Housework can wait.
I’m not suggesting that you live in a hovel 😂 but don’t prioritise a tidy house over having fun.
They won’t remember the neatly arranged cushions but they will remember the time you set up an assault course in the living room on a rainy day!
Have their friends round and include them on outings if you can. Get to know them, make friends with them.
This is SO important as they become teenagers.
Let your house be a welcoming space for them and their friends. Check in with them.
Far better to have a few lively boys in your house than drinking in the local park.
And they probably WILL drink. So make sure it’s safe for them. Be ready to rescue anyone who has had too much, without judgement.
Give them lifts, pick them up. I’d rather do that and know they were all safe.
I once spent NYE driving my boy and his friends around. Yes, I’d rather have been at home with a glass of something and the telly on.
But they still remember the fun we had. I literally sat in the car for two hours while they were at a friends who lived miles away. I didn’t mind.
Keep the lines of communication open. Tell them that you love them and that you’re proud of them. Be affectionate with them.
Often.
When difficult times come, it’s easier to deal with if they know that you’re on their side. It’s easier for you, too.
Mostly, have fun with them! It passes far too quickly! Oh and take LOTS of photos and videos!