Anyone on here have many friends?

[Benny91]

As me and my partner at age 33 don’t have any if at all, just work colleagues.

Do you have many friends if at all?

And how did you meet those friendss?

I have a few close friends from my school days that I speak to daily and see every school holidays and on our and our kids birthdays. Our kids are close and have grown up like cousins.

I have a few mums from my children’s schools that I occasionally meet for lunch/dinners.
I’m really shy and awkward so I think I just got lucky.

Really depends on how you define "friend". A friend to me is someone that I would get out of bed for at 2am, drive 80 miles for and bail them out.

In which case I have 4.

Probably got about 6-8 in my outer circle. I like socialising with them very much but we are not intimate friends.

I do think definitions vary significantly. One of my friends will call someone she had met once a friend. I would not even call them an acquaintance.

Though I expect she thinks I'm a bitch because she was trying to get me to go out on the grounds that I might make new friends. I told her that I had just the right amount with no vacancies.

My life is just so hectic that I don't get to go or with the people I want to, let alone think I should do.

I have lots now, but I went through a dry phase in my early twenties before I started work properly . Twenty years later I am still friends with a lot of the people I met in my first job although we see each other less now, we are still very tight and speak most days, but we were all single and alone in London so we sort of all had to be friends. And I now have new work friends, plus friends I've made on my road and through school too. I feel very blessed, it's such an outlet to have people to reach out to who get you. I have a lot of negative stuff in my life but my friends really lift me up.

My husband has loads of friends and is perpetually making new ones. I often hang out with his friends by default but I would only call maybe 4 or 5 of them my friends that I would hang out with without him.

I have my old school friends, which is becoming quite difficult in our 30s, in particular as I am the only one who has children. I think we’ll stay in touch but I do feel a bit at arms length right now.

I also have a small group of mum friends from the school run. These are my ride or die, would (and have!) call in an emergency and know they would come running.

im not very good at making friends at hobbies or evening classes or anything like that, but I keep trying!

No im in my forties and found I lost friends in my thirties when everyone got busy with work and family.
I have two old friends from school I see a couple times a year.
A couple of mum friends I see sporadically for a coffee.
Dh has a group of school friends he sees a few times a year.
Tbh im pretty busy at the moment to invest more in friendships. But if I feel differently down the line I will join some social groups.

I have lots of friends and a few really close friends. Most I have met from work over many years and working in different teams but also some via my children and also some from school or through my partner or studying.

For me the important thing is making an effort to keep in touch and meet up.

I have friends but don’t live near most of them.

School, uni, work, NCT and nursery. Most of them from previous jobs.

Oh also a previous flatmate and someone i met on twitter!

Yes I have quite a lot. I would say I’m on the edge of several circles of friends rather than having a bestie, but actually there’s a reason for that and it suits me. In terms of people I actually see, a group of 4 primary school friends, a couple of secondary school friends, 6 uni friends, 2 antenatal group friends and then a big bunch of ‘mum’ friends who I met when ds was a baby/toddler. With those ones I also now have a big history of volunteering and hobby activities too, plus holidays together with some.

DP has some uni friends of 40 years and then several brilliant more recent friends, all around his main hobby which is tabletop gaming.

We both get on with people at work but neither of us really has work friends.

I’d say it takes two years to make a solid friendship, but it can be fun from day 1, in fact that’s the point! But you cant make friends without meeting people. If you want more friends, do more things.

Not really that many. The ones I do have are one from university, one from postgrad and a few old work colleagues who I became friends with.

The thing is, when you re younger, it's much easier to hang around together. But when you become older into your 30s, people attending to be starting families. Meeting people settling down moving away, possibly. Friendships do dwindle.

I have a lot of friends (not a brag, just answering your question). But everyone is busy and we don't get to meet up all that often.

I have three friends from school. One lives abroad. We tend to meet up when the one who lives abroad comes home for her annual holiday.

I have two very close friends. One has been my friend since childhood and the other is a college friend. But they don't live near me. So location is a challenge.

I have a lot of friends from work. A few have retired now, so we have a get together occasionally. But we keep in touch during the year by messaging, so it feels like we're in contact more often. I meet one of them more regularly. She never married or had kids and I don't think she has a lot of friends. I suspect she may be quite lonely. So I try to meet with her more often.

I have a few local friends. I got to know them through an activity I'm involved with. I don't socialise with them really outside of the activity, but we meet up at organised events on a regular basis. I'm closer to one of them and I meet her for coffee from time to time.

I never got friendly with local mothers when DD was a baby. That's one thing I regret. But my maternity leave was short (I had four months paid maternity leave and never took any unpaid leave). The first few months of maternity leave was a blur of sleepless nights, feeding, nappy changing etc. By the time I was considering joining a mother and baby group, it was time to go back to work. I got friendly with a few parents of DD's school friends through birthday parties etc. But we were friendly, not real friends iykwim. Now that our children are young adults, we never see each other. However, I did form a close friendship with one of the mothers. We meet for coffee from time to time.

A lot of these friendships didn't happen overnight. It took time (in some cases, years) to build. And the friendships have waxed and waned at different periods. I didn't have a lot of time for friendships when DD was a baby and a small child. I have more time to invest in them now.

Some friends from school, others from work, two very close friends through my children and okay groups, and a bigger group through my hobby

Yes we’re similar age and both still friends with people from school, uni, former/current colleagues. Don’t necessarily see them all that often due to busy lives and being quite spread out.

1 primary school. 3 University, 4 work, 1 antenatal class, 1 as her DH asked me a question on the bus, 2 via school gate, 2 via walking group, 1 through voluntary work. 1 through a bereavement group, 2 neighbours.

My closest friend who I met when I was 12 died 5 years ago and also 2 other friends, lovely women I knew at University have died within the last 5 years. I have a few other acquaintances I’m friendly with. I have also not pursued friendships with some people though I have had the chance.

I am 59 and have totally relocated twice in my life.

DH says I’m very good at storytelling and have an open honest face and that’s why people are very comfortable with me.

I have one small group of friends ,we all used to work together and are now retired. I also go to a social group and tend just to keep things on a basis where we can chat about things. I also go to a dance group and the women are older than me and of course have a lot going on. We have around half an hour when we have a cup of coffee and we find out how everyone is and if anything important is happening.

I’ve got a couple of close friends one through baby groups with my eldest DS and another I made through a old job. I then have a handful of friends I have made through DCs school but they are more acquaintances. Not friends with anybody from school/college anymore.

I’m in my 50s, happily single & childfree so no couple friends / friends met through kids. I met most of my friends through feminist campaigning & volunteering for my local animal rescue.

Also some old friends from university & from when I first came out as lesbian, back around the millennium.

Yes, quite a lot.

A big circle from school/6th form. Of which about 4 I’m in touch with weekly, and who I’d call in an emergency before I called my parents.

A few from a 10-year stint living abroad, all know each other but not all specifically one friendship group. One of which I could 100%rely on and is godmother to my kids.

Some more recent ones: kids friends parents, a little group of other Sen parents etc. I’m not sure how closely we’ll stay in touch after the kids leave primary, but there are at least 2 who I definitely wouldn’t want to lose touch with.

Plus other people from my current work and a volunteering role I do, who I would class as friends but am unlikely to stay in touch with afterwards.

A fair few yes, some back from childhood and university, some from interests and some from work.

What are you interested in? It's probably the best way to find them, if you want them

I’ve got quite a few friends yes - some from school days, from university, from previous jobs and now from being a mum people I met at baby/ toddler groups etc.

What I don’t have is one, coherent large ‘friend group’ which is what I’m sometimes envious of - lots of couples and families socialising together kind of thing.

Did have that more in my 20s (in previous relationships). People drift and life gets busy.

I’m also not seeing/ socialising with friends particularly regularly - I’m out twice this month for lunch/ drinks with different friends - that’s probably the most it would ever be these days. I did go trick or treating with a couple of mum friends and their kids last night, and have a play date with another arranged later - but that’s more for the kids although I’d consider the mums friends it isn’t for our benefit!

Because most of my existing friends had kids younger and I was older, we’re at a different phase of life so I was quite determined to make ‘mum friends’ (sorry I know some people hate that term) so went about it quite deliberately- inviting people to things, asking to swap numbers, making a point of putting myself out there. Helping out when I could too - that was a big one. You have to take some knock backs but I found it easier once I got going and I have a couple of really good friends now that I’m so glad of. I’m using these friends from baby groups as an example, and I do think it’s maybe slightly easier in this setting as you have a group of women with similar things going on probably looking for connection - but still I think I’d apply that approach again. It’s definitely helped my confidence in terms of putting myself out there and if the other person isn’t interested well fair enough, I’m not for everyone and they’re probably not for me.

Quite a few with varying levels of closeness - old friends from uni and travel 40(!) years ago, friends from previous jobs, mum-friends from when my kids were at school quite a few years ago now, baby group friends who now meet occasionally for dinner. My most recent good friends I made were from answering a post in a local fb group to form a book club.

I am reserved and socially awkward and find it difficult to put myself out there to make and maintain these friendships, but I force myself because they’re important to me, and my life would be far poorer without them.

Quite a few.

My very oldest friend who I met the first day of primary school over 50 years ago! We lost touch about 15 years ago but reconnected recently which is lovely.

My next oldest and best friend and DD1's godmother. We met 36 years ago when I was going out with her cousin. I dumped him and kept her!

My next oldest friend and DD2's godmother. We met 30 years ago when we worked together. We are total opposites but get on like a house on fire.

Then there's the wife of DH's best friend. I met her for the first time on our wedding day 23 years ago. We had an instant connection and have been good friends ever since. She lives 4K miles away, but we message regularly and holiday as a foursome.

My 4 local girlfriends. We all met nearly 20 years ago, at the school gates when our DDs started at primary school. We see each other all the time for coffee, shopping, lunch, weekends away etc. An added bonus is that DH is very good mates with their husbands too.

I'm also close with my two female cousins who I've known all my life obviously.

Then there's various ex school, university, work colleagues that I'm still in touch with and we meet up occasionally, but not particularly close.

How do you make friends at the gym? Do you mean that you just chat to them in spin class or do you regularly meet them outside of the gym?

I wonder if you have a loose definition of friends as I don't see how you can maintain so many friendships.

None. All my “friends” are family members. Fine with it tbh.

I’m 58 and I’ve acquired them in different ways; early days of nursing, house shares, previos and present jobs, school mums. The thing is I work at my relationships. I keep in touch, I arrange, I plan. Some people expect that friendships endure without any investment, they don’t. I’ve also lost some friendships along the way. Some because it became apparent our values no longer aligned, some that offered no reciprocation of the work I was putting in.

I have 3 close friends who I met in different ways.

One I met at a hobby, one I met online originally but we talk almost every single day and we’ve met up multiple times now despite living a few hundred miles from each other and the last was a friend of a friend type situation (I was at a party hosted by a school friend where I met the school friend’s friend’s SIL, I became friendly with the SIL and I then met my close friend at a party the SIL invited us both to, a bit complicated but we clicked straight away and eventually became really good friends and she’s now joined me and my first friend at the same hobby).

I have quite a few other friends and acquaintances through that hobby too. I’ve also recently joined a darts team and I’m getting to know everyone there well too.

My DC are older now but when they were younger I didn’t have many friends as I was one of the first of my friends from school to have kids so we started to drift apart a little then and it was only after going to toddler groups (then later nursery and school) that I started to make friends again. Having the time for hobbies now DC are older has definitely helped me expand my circle too.