What things do you find odd that are considered normal in your society/culture?

[BrucesBarAndGrill]

This is inspired by a conversation I was having earlier that I found interesting.

The thing that sparked the conversation was that I said I thought it was odd how adults are expected to share beds and on the flip side of that how parents who co-sleep with their children are seen as doing something odd or different to the accepted norm. I can't understand why it's seen as normal to put a baby/small child to bed on their own in a different room while adults, who don't have the same need of protection and care, share a bed in a different room.

I assume that other people must think about things like this aswell and I was wondering what social/cultural norms felt strange to you?

Worship of the NHS - it’s bloody awful

I hate it when people hold their knife and fork in the wrong hands, but I do recognise that’s irrational.

Ah ok, Still though I don’t understand why it hasn’t been made illegal in England.

That 'charm' is not a valued characteristic and continuum thinking is shunned and anti-intellectualism is embraced e.g. if you discuss the Arts or culture in any way, let alone in depth, you are seen as a pretentious w**nker. You can only really discuss STEM subjects and not receive any backlash.

It isn't the "wrong" hands

Do you insist that left handers write with their right hands as well?

I can only speak for my family but in our case it is everyone mucking in, children, parents, grandparents, extended family etc. all step up to help care for dc, the disabled and elderly as and when they are needed. Male or female. There is always someone available, and it is always reciprocated.

The societal love for dogs. Not at an individual level - I can understand someone loving their dog. But the assumption that everyone does, and the very very strong reaction if you say you don’t.
I know people who love their horses, or their cats, but if someone says “oh I don’t really like horses” they don’t act like that person is a social pariah.

@smallglassbottle oops😂 yes, I seemed to have contradicted myself with my last post. TBF the City I live in is a world away from my 90s West and South London comps so youngest's school is more likely to have parents who are keen on the Arts, work in the creative industries. An example of which was when we were invited by our eldest's friends parents to their house for some Christmas drinks, at one point in the evening we were all discussing the artist, Marina Abramovic, specifically when put a gun and knives on a table in front of her and told strangers passing they could do what they liked to her, someone ripped her clothes off, held a gun to her head...most parties we go to don't have that level of intensity but we lots of our friends would talk about politics and current affairs as well as small talk.

That’s not the point I’m making, though. If you specialise early, regardless of how well or badly you then do at your specialism, you drop other subjects too early, meaning your general education is poor.

As you mention architecture, I have two close friends who are architects, both of whom came through the school system in my home country. One has his own practice, the other works for an internationally famous practice which has won a lot of awards. Their careers certainly haven’t been hampered by not being able to specialise as narrowly as early, and they will inevitably have a better overall standard of education. Extrapolate that a population at large, and you have a significant difference in general educational standards.

My mum drilled into us the 'proper' way to hold a knife and fork. I know it's completely ridiculous but I get secretly irritated when I see people doing it the 'wrong' way. Then I get annoyed with myself that it bothers me!

So out of curiosity, why do you hate it? Why are they the ‘wrong’ hands?

By “wrong” I just mean according to etiquette. Obviously not objectively wrong. I guess, as another poster said, it’s because it was drilled into me to do it the “correct” way as a child. I won’t force my children do it, though.

I’m the opposite. People who are “very British” like you annoy the crap out of me. If there’s something on my face tell me. There’s nothing rude about asking directly for personal questions. If the other person doesnt want to answer they can just say so. All the dancing around topics trying not to offend is exhausting. Ask the question and move on to something productive.

There’s nothing rude about asking directly for personal questions.

That's the thing though, it is considered rude in our culture. If you don't acknowledge that, you risk getting people's backs up unwittingly.

Depending on how much space you have it can cause problems with banging elbows.

Some cutlery doesn't work in the 'wrong' hands eg fish knives.

I find it interesting when it is right handed people doing it. You use a knife and fork in both hands so it isn't like you are just using one hand.

If you are buttering a slice of bread or cutting a slice of cake do you use your left or right hand?

One of my friends eats like this and he doesn't cut the meat on his plate, he will hold it with the fork and sort of drag it away with the fork he doesn't actually cut the food.

You say the UK - it's not legal in Scotland

Have you seen French mothers discipline their children?

No but the very fact that you asked makes me think I would find it awful. Or maybe I'm thinking too negatively and it's all respectful and gentle and works really nicely?

What is the standard child discipline technique in France?

I'm probably seen as a weirdo then because I say hello or more likely alright bab to people I walk past, see in shops etc all the time🤭

I find the level of maturity and responsibility that different countries expect of their children fascinating... or even within the same country.
From 6/7yos walking home alone from school in some places, to others insisting that 12yos are to young to be left for 10mins alone. What makes a Swiss 6yo more responsible than an Irish 11yo?

I don't agree that the early specialism equates to a lack of general knowledge. In my case, A-levels cultivated analytic skills and fostered an intellectual curiosity, that along with cultural references, familial norms is IMO, what expands your general knowledge. Equally, that process needs to begin before going to a UK university as this approach is needed to do well on any Arts/Humanities degree course where there is limited contact time and extensive, independent reading around the subject is required.

Yes, DH works and has worked for award winning practices, he's at Director level so I don't think he would have got to that point in his career if his overall general knowledge was poor as creativity is informed by intellectual curiosity. That's not to say I think the people you know don't have that but I don't think you need to be taught general knowledge, you can acquire it for yourself, if a love of learning is fostered at a young age .

Equally, by understanding the process of learning and expanding my own general knowledge rather than being taught it, I am pretty versatile in the world of work and have pretty much taught myself my current job in data as I am intellectually self-reliant.

The drinking culture. Excessively drinking so much that you have limited/no control of yourself and your actions, vomiting/nearly shitting yourself
and feeling like crap the next day.

It’s bizarre that it’s seen as quite normal and a sort of right of passage.

I eat the same way and I've never had anyone comment on it...

Dairy....

nobody breastfeeds as an adult and yet its completely normal to ingest the breast milk of other animals once over the age of weaning.
I mean its weird, isnt it?

People double parking even if there’s a normal space a few cars away, so they can be exactly outside their house (or the house they’re visiting).

we have terraced housing with wide streets and wide pavements, so cars tend to park on the pavement leaving plenty of pavement space for wheelchairs, and the road entirely free. However, if a second car wants to park outside the same house, instead of pulling in behind or in front, they’ll park parallel in the road, so as to be exactly opposite the house. The road is wide, but it still forces traffic around it and if the same happens on the other side of the street, the narrowing is significant. Why not park normally and walk the 1.5 meters?