Donating a loved one's body to science

[Rhond24]

Elderly DDad, at age 93, has decided that he wants to donate his body to science (ie to a medical school). I've made preliminary investigations for him but I'm not sure how I feel about it. DM is 91 and after a lifetime of obeying, wouldn't go against his wishes - but deep down I'm not sure that she loves the idea either.
I feel like it's depriving those left behind of their own choice in the matter and the chance to say goodbye in a "normal" socially accepted way.
Does anyone have experience of doing this? How did it work out for your family?

Lucy Owen spoke about this recently, I've tried to attach the link

www.bbc.co.uk/news/articles/cly7lwp8pyno

I’m a registrar. This comes up periodically. Age isn’t necessarily a factor… I’ve done the paperwork for a 105 year old who donated their body to medical research.
I’d say about 50% of the time, it doesn’t end up happening for one reason or another, but the family feel they have honoured their loved one’s wishes by going through the process.
Please don’t do a big company like Pure Cremation though if it doesn’t work out. I don’t really want to go into it for those who have used them but your local cremation service will do a direct cremation for a similar price and it’s much nicer (I think!) for your loved one not being stored and transported perhaps hundreds of miles. A local crematorium and a direct cremation is just the same without the flash advertising.
The person donating their body to medical research can also choose not to have their bodies returned at the end. They can choose to have a cremation and nobody know when. That’s their choice if they want to make that. Just so you’re prepared for that as an option.
I think it a marvellous choice to want to make. My eldest is a medic and they did dissection at med school: they attended a service every year held by the University for the family members of those who had donated their bodies. The bodies are always treated with so much respect. It’s invaluable for future surgeons.

Funerals are for the living, not the dead. The idea that you pay your respects at a funeral is crazy - you pay respect to the living, by being there for them when they are alive not by gathering to cry at the side of a grave.
My mother was my best friend, the one person I wanted to tell when something good happened or wanted to turn to when something bad happened. I arranged the traditional funeral (it's what was expected back then) but today I can barely remember it. I can't remember which hymns we sang, or who attended, I don't remember what the flower arrangements were like or what the celebrant said in his eulogy. The funeral was pointless; I remember the gaping hole I felt in my heart, the sorrow of her loss, the pain of accepting that I would never speak to her again or sit at her table eating a piece of her legendary chocolate cake.
Funerals don't give closure, losing a loved one isn't something you can get over, you just learn to live with the pain because there's nothing else you can do. The only comfort I take in my mother's death is that I followed her wishes in life and death. That's the most important duty you can do.

I loved that my grandma did this as her last wish, it was characteristic of her to want it. We said goodbye without her body but with her favourite foods and all of our memories. We got what was left of her remains (cremated) a good long while after she passed and used it as a chance to get together and have a memorial, which was nice to do a while on anyway. They’d probably be able to give you an indication of timeline, I can’t remember as Covid muddled everything.

The documentary she did about this is really great and probably on iplayer.

My PIL tried to do this.
DH also was asked to fill in paperwork, acknowledging his father's choices.
Didn't happen in end as he died on a bank holiday and the body wasn't collected in time.
Was stressful and upsetting. I wouldn't do it.

I’ve been part of organising this for a friend who was terminally ill and I was next of kin for, it was a bit of a surreal experience.

From an organising/managing point of view the uni she used were amazing, they have a dedicated liaison person who was my contact person from initial enquiry until eventual cremation, super professional, empathic and caring, were clear that all questions were welcomed and answered honestly and they came to the cremation, sent beautiful flowers.

Practically the forms were easy and straightforward, she signed up to the program and agreed she could be kept up to 10 years, they actually only used her for just over 2 years, getting the phone call from the university to say she could be cremated was odd and came out of the blue! The uni paid for and organised the cremation but allowed us to choose lots of things, the undertakers used by the uni obviously managed all the donated bodies and spoke at the funeral about the importance and impact of body donation. It was a lovely cremation actually.

From a grieving point of view, we were able to visit her at the funeral directors for a couple of days before she moved to the uni, we had a celebration of life not long after she died which was lovely. The time while she was at the uni was tricky, I found myself randomly wondering what they were doing to her and her children (teenagers at the time) said the same thing - it was like an intrusive thought that none of us could quite get rid of.

At the time I was quite vocal about my emotional struggles with the process, but in hindsight I’d support anyone who wanted to do it.

My 99 year old granny donated her body and we were all really pleased. My grandad had also done it about 20 years ago. I will do the same.

On a practical level, when she died it took a few hours to get things arranged as she had completed the paperwork a while ago. So we had to speak to someone at the university to make sure she was still eligible.

We had a memorial service for her with music, readings just like a funeral and it was obviously discussed during the ceremony that she wasn't there as she had given her body to medical research. No one seemed phased by it.

The university do a thanksgiving service each year where family members go and they thank them and there were some medical students talking about how much they appreciated being able to learn from our relatives.

We got her ashes back after about two years. We had been through it all with my grandad and knew what to expect and really all think it is a great thing to do.

The person who has died, obviously. It’s their body.

I was thinking of that story.
I would be uncomfortable with it and would try and discuss it with him. I would not arrange it for him. He could arrange that himself.
I think that donating organs is as far as i would go

Respectfully, completely disagree. A funeral (or not) is the last wish of the departed person. It has to be respected.

Respect his wishes, hold a memorial service. It’s a very valuable thing to do, I know it’s hard and I’m sorry for your loss.

I tried to leave my body to a teaching hospital. I talked the decision over with my adult child, and we agreed that it was fine. Id gone way past the age when any of my organs would be of use to anyone, but leaving my body just might.

I took my sibling out for lunch and told them of my intentions. They didn't like my decision, I didn't expect them to, hence the lunch, but they accepted it.

The teaching hospital accepted my "donation" with a few caveats. Like, if I died over a weekend, bank holiday or they had too many bodies, they wouldn't take me.

ten years later I got an email from them saying they no longer accept bodies for students to practice in because they use AI.

so I've opted for a direct cremation.

H however I've told my adult child that they must do with my dead body what they wish. I won't be around, so really shouldn't have an opinion.

if a funeral is something they want, to help with their grief that is what they should have.

Again, I won't be around so shouldn't have an opinion.

I understand why people who have a religious beliefs may think differently, but neither me not my child have those beliefs

I couldn’t do this now, at one time maybe. My dad died in awful circumstances, it was a routine procedure and he had a massive stroke whilst going under anaesthetic. He survived for a further two weeks trapped in his body. They had to determine how and what had happened so a post mortam was performed. This absolutely freaked me out, the thought of him being cut open traumatised me so much.

I’m not a religious person but it hurt me that he’d had to go through this before his funeral, just couldn’t get it out of my head. I’ve also removed myself from the donor organ register, I want to be whole when I die. My reaction to the whole situation surprised me, I was quite blasé before this happened to my dad.

I once watched an interview with a funeral director who also said he would never donate his organs. He explained that even though the donor is brain dead they’re being kept alive, so they are given a medication that paralyses them to stop them jerking when the organs are harvested. I’d never heard this before and was utterly shocked if that’s the case, someone may correct me on here. Does the body still feel pain??

Any hoo I’ll be whole when I shuffle off this planet 🤷‍♀️

Sounds like a good thing to do...until you read stories like these:

https://www.sciencealert.com/an-elderly-woman-s-body-was-donated-to-science-and-then-her-son-found-out-the-truth

https://www.reuters.com/legal/litigation/harvard-must-face-lawsuits-over-theft-body-parts-by-ex-morgue-manager-court-2025-10-06/

https://arstechnica.com/science/2021/11/man-donated-his-body-to-science-company-sold-500-tickets-to-his-dissection/

https://www.france24.com/en/20200710-france-investigates-report-of-bodies-left-to-rot-at-paris-research-centre

It’s a wonderful thing to do. I’ll be doing it. My body my choice. His body his choice. You have the memories. Donating your body when you no longer need it is the ultimate gift to humanity. Well done for him, and get a grip over your ‘feelings’.

None of those are in the UK though.

@Snippit I fully agree with you. Check out the book "The Brain Death Fallacy" by Dr. Heidi Klessig.

Funeral directors deal with the dead. They are not experts in surgery of any type, be that on living people, or brain dead who are donating organs.
It would be like a cleaner making out they are an authority on space travel.

I looked into this. In my area they have very specific requirements.

If it helps at all, I had the privilege of studying anatomy with full body dissection as a medical student.
It helped our understanding immeasurably and there was an atmosphere of immense respect throughout.
We were very aware that these people were someone’s loved one.

I suspect research is a little different, but still very respectful.

As others have said, there’s a few things that have to align for it to actually happen at the time anyway so be prepared for that.

I've signed up to do this. Thankfully the amazing hospital that saved my life a few years ago accepts donors for this sort of thing, and it's my way of thanking them for what they did for me. My family are fine with my decision.

There are a lot of conditions for acceptance though, and there is no guarantee my body will actually be accepted when the time comes (eg. No open wounds, no dementia or specific types of cancer). But I think it's a great thing to be able to do if you can, as medical people agree that AI can't replace the real thing.

You need to contact your nearest medical school to arrange this. But as others have said he can't die on a weekend or a bank holiday unless he (his body) is correctly stored.

Can you tell I'm signed up?

If you can find it there is a documentary, 'donated to science'. It interviews people who have opted to donate their body (obviously while still alive) and then they filmed medical students dissecting them, and yes it does take two years, finally it shows the medical students the film of 'their' body.

I seem to remember the medical school hold a memorial service for the relatives of those who have donated.

A friend trained as a med student and the first years dissected the same body throughout the year. At the end of the year, they went to a service for the people they dissected. The students felt a connection to the person and the service was quite moving.

locally they only accept bodies Monday to Friday 9-5 and that’s not when most people die. So it’s not that likely to actually happen despite your parents best planning.