I hate driving now. After a collision i might give up.

Alicew00 · 2025-10-12T15:51:35+00:00

Last week i was slowly edging forwards out of my drive and another woman who was speeding collided with me. Couldn't see her because of vans parked up. I didn't hear it either. My DD began crying bless her. Both got damage obviously and I'm unsure if they'll write off my car but i hope they do. I've had headaches and dizziness since but luckily all ok. I'm going back to walking,bike etc 🤦♀️ probably both our fault or mine but everyone's such in a rush and angry.

Wherethewildthings · 12/10/2025 17:16

Well, this was your fault as you edged into her right of way. But, given driving causes you a lot of stress and you have alternative transport, that sounds like a reasonable decision.

YorkshireGoldDrinker · 12/10/2025 17:25

Driving used to be a fun and leisurely experience. There has since been an explosion in the number of people on the road and equally a decline in standards, so there are more accidents on the road than ever before.

I honestly think you should try to get back behind the wheel. Please don't give up. You will lose your confidence and getting it back is extremely difficult. I speak from experience, although my accident was a prang rather than a full on smash like yours sounds (I don't mean to be rude).

I, too, have edged out of my driveway when some knobber has appeared suddenly, slammed their brakes on and given me a dirty look for inconveniencing their poor life choices and my daring to leave my house.

Please don't give up driving.

Original poster

Alicew00 · 12/10/2025 17:35

YorkshireGoldDrinker · 12/10/2025 17:25

Driving used to be a fun and leisurely experience. There has since been an explosion in the number of people on the road and equally a decline in standards, so there are more accidents on the road than ever before.

I honestly think you should try to get back behind the wheel. Please don't give up. You will lose your confidence and getting it back is extremely difficult. I speak from experience, although my accident was a prang rather than a full on smash like yours sounds (I don't mean to be rude).

I, too, have edged out of my driveway when some knobber has appeared suddenly, slammed their brakes on and given me a dirty look for inconveniencing their poor life choices and my daring to leave my house.

Please don't give up driving.

Thank you for your reply i appreciate it 🙏

OP posts:

TwinklyStork · 12/10/2025 17:38

You admit that you couldn’t see her coming past the vans, so you either weren’t edging out slowly enough, or you weren’t doing so at the correct angle. Why did you pull out if you couldn’t see past the vans that it was safe to do so?

That she was speeding (was she really?) is neither here nor there; you pulled out into her path when you couldn’t see it was safe to proceed so yes, insurance will deem it your fault. It worries me that people who drive like that are on the road so yes, if you have an alternative way to get around you should probably take it.

MadridMadridMadrid · 12/10/2025 17:42

I think any kind of accident can really shake you up and knock your confidence, but I wouldn't give up driving altogether. If you lose the confidence to drive at all, I think you will end up really regretting it. There are times when it's just so useful to be able to drive and public transport/taxis are simply not an adequate alternative.

BreadInCaptivity · 12/10/2025 17:44

I love driving but after a crash - not my fault as I was rear ended by a man failing to brake as was on his phone (thankfully no one injured) - I had a bit of a wobble about driving for a few weeks.

So if you’re not a confident/enthusiastic driver to begin with I can see why you feel as you do.

That said if you give up now it’s only going to get harder to start again after a long gap.

You may be fine without a car now, but circumstances change and personally I think it’s an important skill to have and I think there is a high chance of you really regretting stopping.

So I’m sorry this happened, understand your feelings but think you shouldn’t let this stop you driving.

edit for typo.

thatsmyhouse · 12/10/2025 17:55

TwinklyStork · 12/10/2025 17:38

You admit that you couldn’t see her coming past the vans, so you either weren’t edging out slowly enough, or you weren’t doing so at the correct angle. Why did you pull out if you couldn’t see past the vans that it was safe to do so?

That she was speeding (was she really?) is neither here nor there; you pulled out into her path when you couldn’t see it was safe to proceed so yes, insurance will deem it your fault. It worries me that people who drive like that are on the road so yes, if you have an alternative way to get around you should probably take it.

Genuine question - if she couldn't see past the vans was she supposed to sit there until they moved? If you're coming off a drive and there are parked vehicles there doesn't tend to be much leeway with angles either. I'm sure you're right about insurance but I do think the driver on the road has some responsibility as well - the hazard perception test is all about stuff like anticipating that cars could appear from driveways concealed by vans, not just going along oblivious. And I'm sure the OP knows the other car was going pretty fast, hence thinking her own car might be written off. That wouldn't be likely if it was a low speed prang.

YorkshireGoldDrinker · 12/10/2025 18:27

TwinklyStork · 12/10/2025 17:38

You admit that you couldn’t see her coming past the vans, so you either weren’t edging out slowly enough, or you weren’t doing so at the correct angle. Why did you pull out if you couldn’t see past the vans that it was safe to do so?

That she was speeding (was she really?) is neither here nor there; you pulled out into her path when you couldn’t see it was safe to proceed so yes, insurance will deem it your fault. It worries me that people who drive like that are on the road so yes, if you have an alternative way to get around you should probably take it.

Do you want the OP to lose their confidence forever? All those lessons, the theory test and practical test were all for nothing, were they? Driving is the single most liberating activity in recent history and you want the OP to be confined to bus timetables? Come on.... she went slowly and got hit by someone going considerably faster than her. That sounds like speeding and a lack of due care and attention.

Let me tell you, parking is atrocious these days. Lots of illegal parking, pavement parking (a nightmare for prams and wheelchair uses), parking right on the edges of junctions/blind corners, so you are forced to edge out slowly and stick out a fair way before you can see enough. It's all part of the decline in standards. Round my way, even buses are blighted by horrendous parking and are often made late because of it. In an area so built-up and seemingly more cars than there are people, if you want to avoid accidents or near-misses, everyone must cooperate, but not everyone does, do they? It only takes one inconsiderate tosspot in the neighbourhood or just someone failing to read the road far ahead enough while driving or parking and you've got an accident waiting to happen. I've been driving for 15 years and most of what I've experienced has been through observation. I could probably have started a YouTube channel combining dashcam footage and CCTV footage of idiots in cars who probably should have surrendered their licence years ago tbh.

MonGrainDeSel · 12/10/2025 19:05

thatsmyhouse · 12/10/2025 17:55

Genuine question - if she couldn't see past the vans was she supposed to sit there until they moved? If you're coming off a drive and there are parked vehicles there doesn't tend to be much leeway with angles either. I'm sure you're right about insurance but I do think the driver on the road has some responsibility as well - the hazard perception test is all about stuff like anticipating that cars could appear from driveways concealed by vans, not just going along oblivious. And I'm sure the OP knows the other car was going pretty fast, hence thinking her own car might be written off. That wouldn't be likely if it was a low speed prang.

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I agree with you. It sounds like OP was doing what driving instructors recommend in this situation - peep and creep, where you inch forward slowly and give anyone coming along the road plenty of time to see you. If the other driver was going so fast that they could not stop in this situation, they are in the wrong rather than OP.

TwinklyStork · 12/10/2025 19:38

YorkshireGoldDrinker · 12/10/2025 18:27

Do you want the OP to lose their confidence forever? All those lessons, the theory test and practical test were all for nothing, were they? Driving is the single most liberating activity in recent history and you want the OP to be confined to bus timetables? Come on.... she went slowly and got hit by someone going considerably faster than her. That sounds like speeding and a lack of due care and attention.

Let me tell you, parking is atrocious these days. Lots of illegal parking, pavement parking (a nightmare for prams and wheelchair uses), parking right on the edges of junctions/blind corners, so you are forced to edge out slowly and stick out a fair way before you can see enough. It's all part of the decline in standards. Round my way, even buses are blighted by horrendous parking and are often made late because of it. In an area so built-up and seemingly more cars than there are people, if you want to avoid accidents or near-misses, everyone must cooperate, but not everyone does, do they? It only takes one inconsiderate tosspot in the neighbourhood or just someone failing to read the road far ahead enough while driving or parking and you've got an accident waiting to happen. I've been driving for 15 years and most of what I've experienced has been through observation. I could probably have started a YouTube channel combining dashcam footage and CCTV footage of idiots in cars who probably should have surrendered their licence years ago tbh.

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Do you want the OP to lose their confidence forever?
If she’s pulling out in front of people when she can’t see then I’d rather she wasn’t on the road, yes.

YorkshireGoldDrinker · 12/10/2025 19:40

TwinklyStork · 12/10/2025 19:38

Do you want the OP to lose their confidence forever?
If she’s pulling out in front of people when she can’t see then I’d rather she wasn’t on the road, yes.

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She purposefully edged out slowly to avoid this very incident, and you consider that as 'pulling out in front of people'?

GreyCarpet · 12/10/2025 19:41

We're you reversing off your drive or pulling out forwards?

Just seen you were coming put forwards 🤦🏻‍♀️

Difficult one, OP, I know how you feel though.

TwinklyStork · 12/10/2025 19:44

YorkshireGoldDrinker · 12/10/2025 19:40

She purposefully edged out slowly to avoid this very incident, and you consider that as 'pulling out in front of people'?

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She pulled out into the path of a car and was hit, so yes, she pulled out in front of someone, that’s what it means!

And that’s a good question someone else asked: if she was reversing out she’s even more at fault because of course she wouldn’t be able to see past a parked car or van if that was the case.

Thissickbeat · 12/10/2025 19:56

TwinklyStork · 12/10/2025 19:38

Do you want the OP to lose their confidence forever?
If she’s pulling out in front of people when she can’t see then I’d rather she wasn’t on the road, yes.

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Should she have moved the van or scrapped her outing?

Creeping incredibly slowly is the only thing she could do. The other car should have been anticipating cars or children appearing and been driving very slowly and more to the centre of the road ( if possible) to allow for this.

YorkshireGoldDrinker · 12/10/2025 19:57

TwinklyStork · 12/10/2025 19:44

She pulled out into the path of a car and was hit, so yes, she pulled out in front of someone, that’s what it means!

And that’s a good question someone else asked: if she was reversing out she’s even more at fault because of course she wouldn’t be able to see past a parked car or van if that was the case.

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She edged out slowly to avoid being hit because the onus is then on any oncoming driver to be paying attention. The slower she goes, the more chance even a speeder has of noticing her.

You think she's unsafe, I think the moron who crashed into her needs to go on a speed awareness course.

I agree to disagree.

Here endeth the conversation.

TwinklyStork · 12/10/2025 20:01

Thissickbeat · 12/10/2025 19:56

Should she have moved the van or scrapped her outing?

Creeping incredibly slowly is the only thing she could do. The other car should have been anticipating cars or children appearing and been driving very slowly and more to the centre of the road ( if possible) to allow for this.

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She clearly either wasn’t creeping slowly enough to stop, since she crept into path of an oncoming car, or was creeping out at the wrong angle if she couldn’t see. You’re obviously not a very good driver yourself if you don’t understand that.

TwinklyStork · 12/10/2025 20:03

YorkshireGoldDrinker · 12/10/2025 19:57

She edged out slowly to avoid being hit because the onus is then on any oncoming driver to be paying attention. The slower she goes, the more chance even a speeder has of noticing her.

You think she's unsafe, I think the moron who crashed into her needs to go on a speed awareness course.

I agree to disagree.

Here endeth the conversation.

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There’s absolutely no proof that the other woman was speeding. Only that the OP pulled out into her path without being able to see clearly enough to ascertain whether it was safe to do so. It wasn’t, clearly, since she was hit. The OP is 100% at fault.

Thissickbeat · 12/10/2025 20:07

TwinklyStork · 12/10/2025 20:01

She clearly either wasn’t creeping slowly enough to stop, since she crept into path of an oncoming car, or was creeping out at the wrong angle if she couldn’t see. You’re obviously not a very good driver yourself if you don’t understand that.

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I've done an advanced driving course and managed 30yrs without a blip.

If the other driver wasn't looking (possibly on phone) they wouldn't have seen her creeping out even at snails pace.

TwinklyStork · 12/10/2025 20:10

Thissickbeat · 12/10/2025 20:07

I've done an advanced driving course and managed 30yrs without a blip.

If the other driver wasn't looking (possibly on phone) they wouldn't have seen her creeping out even at snails pace.

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Total speculation that she was on the phone. You don’t even know she was speeding, other than taking the word of an overwrought and anxious driver who a) has just caused an accident and b) couldn’t even SEE the other car by her own admission, so has no business saying she was speeding since she couldn’t even see her (or hear her, apparently).

The OP pulled out in front of another car when she couldn’t see whether it was safe to proceed. She is 100% at fault.