How do you react if you bump into someone from school?

[MariaLioness]

I'm going to preface this by saying that I've just turned 25. So yes I'm a lot younger than most of the posters here. I went to a selective mixed-sex private secondary school and stayed on at this very school for 6th form.

I'm making this thread because I've had a varied reaction when people from school see me these days. At uni a few people I went to school with went to my university. I even had a class with a few and we'd always greet each other in a friendly manner. I changed uni for master's and had someone purposely avoid me when they saw me.

Now occasionally I'll see people in central on public transport. I've had a former acquaintance come up to me, shake my hand and ask me how I'm doing. Someone a few years below me asked me for a job because they wanted to work in my industry.

I'm a friendly person and like saying hello. But I know not everyone is like that, so it doesn't bother me at all if someone gives me the cold shoulder.

Just wondering what experiences others have had.

If the person could see me/had seen me (ie I’m not going to bellow at someone across the road) I’d be surprised and excited! Attended school abroad in a tiny place, so running into an old classmate would be a real shock. I’m nearly 40 and it hasn’t happened yet (not counting organized meet-ups).

Basically pretend I haven’t noticed them, I’ve got no with to revisit school times with people I haven’t stayed in contact with

I’m a similar age and terrible with faces - I barely recognise people I see frequently if it’s outside the usual context that I see them. If someone recognises me and says hi then I’ll say hi back and then continue on with whatever I’m doing.

Shocked but trying not to show it. Recently on separate occasions three “old” men have greeted me warmly and told me they were in my class at school. I don’t know how it happened that they are retired and I am still 26😂

I'm 34 and in recent years have run into loads of women from my secondary school as it seems like everyone had kids around the same time. Most of the time they recognise me (I put this down to an unusual name and look being ethnic and definitely a minority in my school). I'm always happy to have a conversation when I come across someone, otherwise I've never kept in touch with anyone from school. I was a different person back then and it doesn't bring back great memories.

Depends on the oerson

Some I say hi, not seen you for ages

Others I say hi, are you still a c*nt, you always were, then walk away

You sound like you struggle to understand that everyone is individual and will have very different relationships with their school experience and with everyone in the school. It sometimes happens that you feel warm towards someone but they don’t like you so you go to say hello but they avoid you and vice versa. There isn’t a set rule on how to behave to others from school - people behave based on how they feel. It also happens that you might remember someone but they don’t remember you. I am wondering if you think that because you remember or like them they must remember or like you?

I don't live anywhere near I went to school but will be in that area for the next few days as dd1 lives there. I have face blindness so I hope no one is offended if I don't recognise them (I have been known not to recognise my own dc) but I'd be happy to say hello and a few words if someone recognises me.

I never really see anyone, aside from my very close friend who I went to secondary with. Loads of my year ended up in different parts of the country/world very quickly after school ended (back in the late 90s). Even the teachers I'm friends with on Instagram don't live in the UK anymore. I think a lot of kids went to Uni and ended up staying in the area afterwards, or went travelling and just never really came back. There are obviously a few still around but I'm bloody terrible with faces and would probably struggle to recognise them. If I did, I'd say hello.

You have “bumped” in to a lot of people Op

and quite a few peculiar experiences

were you actually friends with these people have supposedly ignored you. / forgotten about you?

Really regret reading this thread yesterday, I had nightmares last night about meeting people from
school!

Really depends how friendly I was with them. Great friends..I’d be delighted to see them.
Barely knew them..They’d get a hello if we even recognised each other.

My actual friends have said hello to me if we happen to bump into each other. Some former acquaintances and "just classmates" have said hello.

The person who purposely looked down at the floor to avoid me was not my friend, but a friend of a friend. And this friend of a friend had been nice enough to answer my questions about the university. The first time they saw me they said hello. The second time she purposely put her head down to avoid me. Initially that stung for a bit and made me think "what did I do wrong?"

Then I realised I was being over sensitive and I don't care anymore

When I was 25 and in my first job, I recognised someone from my class working in the same area. I think we both made the decision to not bother acknowledging each other even though our parts broadly crossed a few times a week.

Two years later, she died in a car crash and I have often thought about the fact that we couldn’t be bothered to catch up. Bit sad really.

I imagine I would say hello and make friendly small talk. Having said which, I once recognised one of the mum’s at my children’s primary school. She was in the year above me at senior school. When I reintroduced myself to her she knew who I was. She then said, “I’ve also seen a few other faces from Xxx School at pick up time.” I have no idea who she was talking about - I didn’t recognise anyone else.

You spend a lot of time bumping and re bumping in to people from school op

This issue aside…. Friends? Good social circle?

I'm just taking about experiences I had in the 6.5 years after leaving school.

Yes. Why do you ask?

spidey senses

Ime people who went to selective schools tend to keep in touch with a wider circle of their classmates, as they have a lot more in common.

Thanks

Mostly I'd pretend I didn't recognise them . Probably now I wouldn't recognise them.

I once, aged about 28, saw a girl from school on the Star Ferry in Hong Kong. We were stood very near each other. I didn't say anything to her or her to me. She wasn't a great friend at school tbf, a bit up herself.

I am now hesitant to posture a greeting incase I get rebuffed with indifference.

wtf

OP this is all a little peculiar.

All this bumping in to people, and then bumping in to them again, and one of them ignoring you, and you navel gazing about it all.

You are in your mid twenties and say you work and have a good circle of friends and socialise. Just enjoy that if it’s the truth