Empty nest.. dropped ds off this weekend

[Enko]

Drove ds to his girlfriends today with all his stuff. (3.5 hours away) He has been at uni the last 5 years (doing a masters right now) so a regular returner but this time its for good. Girlfriend is lovely and they are so good together so its a good thing.

Dd2 moved out end of August to start her Masters with a part time job. Dd1 is getting married next month!!!!

Still dd3 left who is at uni 5.5 hours away in her last year.

I have had children in and put of the house. Off to uni back for a while etc for the last 8 years. Yet somehow this time feels more significant as there is only dd3 left to return home (if she does she is looking at a studentship straight after uni) and the house is soo quiet. Ddog snuggled into me and dh next door (working on his Masters)..

Said to my friend "time for another baby" but those days are long gone.

Im so very proud of my 4 and they are all right where they are meant to be right now. I know we have brought them up to be dtrong independent individuals and thats wonderful..

But this silence and knowing this is it. Is very very strange..

I know I will fill the time. I know dh and I (and dawg) will be fine (once dog stops sulking like he does each time one of them Goes)

I just want to put it out there how strange a feeling this empty nest is. How I dont think its some silly joke or something to make fun off or put down. Its a massive life shift. While Im happy for my lot and proud of them it is a change and a big change.

It’s hard, really fucking hard and people saying ‘it’s how it’s supposed to be are right, but it’s still hard!! With 4 kids, two of whom with long term partners, odds are you’ll have grandkids soon enough who will fill your house with noise and chaos but with a time limit - the best of both! I would make plans with DH about how the two of you have a riot in the next 3-5 years travelling, having new experiences, taking up hobbies etc so that, if you want to, you can be an involved grandparent later on. It’s a new temporary stage of your life where you can make the most of the independence, then decide what is next later on

I know its a temporary stage. But unfortunately dhs health doesnt allow us to make grand plans. I hope he will be around for grandchildren. Finances are also at a pinch but my children have a good base and they know they are loved. Thara umportant.

Yea its hard.

My DD is 20 and spending her 3rd year of university abroad. DH and I were together a long time before DD was born. We were happy then and we're happy now but oh we miss her!

She is so much fun, brings so much energy into our home.

I wish you and your DH well, OP.

It’s hard!!
really hard - I’ve been single for a long time last year DD1 moved in with her boyfriend, DD2 went to uni and then Ddog passed away at the grand old age of 16 😥
although DD2 comes back not very offen as her life is now in her uni town.
but!! I survived it was a new way of life and I’ve decided that this year was going to be my year of healing.
getting used to my own company and doing things on my own and it’s actually been ok.
I’ve got a busy job and really good friends.
maybe next year I’ll start to date but had to get used to being properly on my own.

so you have my hugs because although you’re super proud of them and happy that they have the confidence to excel in life it does sometimes feel we’ve been left behind ❤️